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[ENFP] Noboby Can Piss Me Off Quite Like An ENFP

F

figsfiggyfigs

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I didn't read the entire thing, in fact I stopped about page 6.


It got really repetitive with people taking shots at you and you defending how you were behaving, and I couldn't grasp what your ultimate point was.


I shouldn't even comment considering I lack adequate information to do so. But from what I got on the first few pages TG, was of you expressing your anger over something you could not control because it had not gone YOUR way. If anything I say was corrected onwards in the thread, forgive me.

Everything I had to say was pretty much posted by Tallulah and Mon. You've used circumstantial excuses, in the end, the teacher owes you nothing other than her ability to judge a paper adequately, and she believes she's done her job, and you don't. Complaining about the issue(which is by-all-means, normal) will get you no where, find a PROPER way to mend it, although quiet honestly, it is way beyond late now. Complaining to the teacher, esp the way you did, passive-aggressively, was your down fall. If anything, it will make your teacher resent you more, which I know you don't care about. The original issue was not with you, it was with the paper itself; and you made it personal.

Even if she did give you the grade you didn't deserve, and she's as irrational as you say, she's probably thinking " that bitch deserves it!" now, and there is no way in hell she's going to even reconsider it. You can't use logic to deal with everyone, you should've appealed to her instead of attacking her and telling her she is lacking as a teacher.

I don't take "types" seriously enough, but I'm sure a few people on here do. Relating an individual's type with the individual themselves is not going to help you get a very good understanding of said person or people in general. You need to better understand individuals to learn how to work with them in the most efficient way possible, especially if you want something going your way. It is a tool more than anything. Type will give you NOTHING regarding who an individual actually is, what they believe, and how the will respond to the things you say/do. Bad reactions come from threats, and threats come from beliefs being questioned, which vary person-to-person.

You have a lot to grow as a person TG, you said it yourself. I honestly think your biggest problem is communication and self-awareness. As we discussed yesterday. From what I've noticed from some of your posts, you take this " who can win this" stance, instead of an open, accepting mind where a discussion is not whose wrong and whose right but a " what can I get out of this" mentality. You can't learn, grow, AND remove your faults if you're not willing or refuse to acknowledge them as such.

You defended yourself when you felt it be needed, although used the wrong technique to do it, but in the end, circumstance aside, your teacher believed your paper was not up to par for an A. This is something you have to accept. If you want to change it, retake the class, but since you've pissed off the teacher, I doubt it's going to change very much. lol.


She is annoyed by Fi driven Ne dom ENFP "championing" of issues or causes, she thinks it messies up the facts, and creates unnecessary drama.

Basically what she's saying is that she doesn't want to deal with people's feelings or ethical issues. Bah humbug. Et al.
btw tg, does it worry you that an ENFP understand what you're saying better than anyone else ? ;D
 

Laurie

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I don't think this thread is about ENFPs. :(
 

Thalassa

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btw tg, does it worry you that an ENFP understand what you're saying better than anyone else ? ;D

Perhaps this is due to my being an ENFP and she being NTJ...we have that special connection, but it's covered in dysfunctional hate/love slime. :wink:
 

Synapse

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Perhaps this is due to my being an ENFP and she being NTJ...we have that special connection, but it's covered in dysfunctional hate/love slime. :wink:

Marmalade.sunrise...accepting her enfpishness
*gasps*
Something about vegan cheese burgers.
 
T

ThatGirl

Guest
I didn't read the entire thing, in fact I stopped about page 6.


It got really repetitive with people taking shots at you and you defending how you were behaving, and I couldn't grasp what your ultimate point was.


I shouldn't even comment considering I lack adequate information to do so. But from what I got on the first few pages TG, was of you expressing your anger over something you could not control because it had not gone YOUR way. If anything I say was corrected onwards in the thread, forgive me.

Everything I had to say was pretty much posted by Tallulah and Mon. You've used circumstantial excuses, in the end, the teacher owes you nothing other than her ability to judge a paper adequately, and she believes she's done her job, and you don't. Complaining about the issue(which is by-all-means, normal) will get you no where, find a PROPER way to mend it, although quiet honestly, it is way beyond late now. Complaining to the teacher, esp the way you did, passive-aggressively, was your down fall. If anything, it will make your teacher resent you more, which I know you don't care about. The original issue was not with you, it was with the paper itself; and you made it personal.

Even if she did give you the grade you didn't deserve, and she's as irrational as you say, she's probably thinking " that bitch deserves it!" now, and there is no way in hell she's going to even reconsider it. You can't use logic to deal with everyone, you should've appealed to her instead of attacking her and telling her she is lacking as a teacher.

I don't take "types" seriously enough, but I'm sure a few people on here do. Relating an individual's type with the individual themselves is not going to help you get a very good understanding of said person or people in general. You need to better understand individuals to learn how to work with them in the most efficient way possible, especially if you want something going your way. It is a tool more than anything. Type will give you NOTHING regarding who an individual actually is, what they believe, and how the will respond to the things you say/do. Bad reactions come from threats, and threats come from beliefs being questioned, which vary person-to-person.

You have a lot to grow as a person TG, you said it yourself. I honestly think your biggest problem is communication and self-awareness. As we discussed yesterday. From what I've noticed from some of your posts, you take this " who can win this" stance, instead of an open, accepting mind where a discussion is not whose wrong and whose right but a " what can I get out of this" mentality. You can't learn, grow, AND remove your faults if you're not willing or refuse to acknowledge them as such.

You defended yourself when you felt it be needed, although used the wrong technique to do it, but in the end, circumstance aside, your teacher believed your paper was not up to par for an A. This is something you have to accept. If you want to change it, retake the class, but since you've pissed off the teacher, I doubt it's going to change very much. lol.



btw tg, does it worry you that an ENFP understand what you're saying better than anyone else ? ;D

You really should take the time to read the rest of the thread, where all of what you stated was addressed, as you may have anticipated.

I do agree that I need to grow more as a person, but I disagree a lot on the areas you stated.

I am very much able and willing to admit when I am wrong, that doesn't mean I am some how obligated to take irrelevant hits when I am right.

If in fact it did come down to a measure of offending the teacher, and by doing so, she became impervious to reconsideration, then it is her who made the situation personal. As you can see from the rest of the thread, my comments were indeed accurate, which the teacher should have been aware of, since she herself participated in the situation.

There is only so much one person can do, when interacting with others. I believe I treated the teacher with respect in the first E-Mail by not trying to manipulate her into seeing it my way, but by accurately addressing the situation as it was.

I am not responsible for her, or anyone else's, interpretations. I have done that enough in my life, to chose not to participate in sacrificing my own truth or integrity in order to make people feel better about things they are wrong in.

This may seem like an oxymoron, and I am aware that this means I will not always get what I want. Though I am just as entitled as anyone else, to not approve of the situation. I take responsibility on my end for myself, and others should as well.

That is their issue, not mine.

I don't think this thread is about ENFPs. :(

It was about how my interactions with ENFPs always pan out at one point or another.
 

Amargith

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I wonder, TG...what the purpose is of this thread? Is it to release some steam, to vent, if you will? Coz you're definitely welcome to do so. But if it is in fact to have a look as to why that is and learn from it, I'd be glad to contribute.

For what it's worth, I never had a real issue with who you are, and I am in fact ENFP. And, from what I recall, we never really did get into arguments. I guess I'm hoping I can inspire you not to give up on us just yet ;)
 

Kalach

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I want to point out, that even in writing this letter, yes I felt uncomfortable. I have never disputed a grade before, ever.

Once again, taking such a leap to question a professors decision, my goal was to provide clear data as to the situation.

Showcasing how I was consistent in putting in my best effort, even despite obvious set backs. That the quality of my work was good, even if it shouldn't have been (not having a text book for the mid term).

That I am a person of integrity, not just trying to get ahead by whatever means possible. So one cannot claim I am simply asking her to fudge my grade.

The goal was to produce the idea of WHY my claim against my grade was worth taking another look at. As a teacher, I would never look at someones grade who just said, I disagree. I would just answer, well that sucks.

I was hoping that in seeing the effort, consistency, and doing generally well despite set backs, it may create some doubt as to why I suddenly received marks so low.

It makes no sense, that I suddenly would have produced poor work for no reason, when even when there were good reasons, I still did well.

That doesn't seem off to anyone else.

Like hmmm that's kind of fishy, that all off a sudden a 35/35 paper writer turns in a 17 point assignment? If there were reasons, like I was flakey, not taking the class seriously, or disregarding my assignments or responsibilities, that would make sense.

That wasn't the case ever, so that is what I tried to show.

Could I have worded it better, sure, in hindsight.

The other point is that when I am that frustrated, and have addressed an issue SEVERAL other times with no, wait, negative results, the LAST thing I am looking for is to be soothed.

If I wanted to FEEL better about the grade, I would have gone home and licked my own wounds.

If she had put the effort she put into being soothing, into looking into the content, I wouldn't have gotten even more pissed off.

As it was my actual concern was being ignored. I could care less how either of us feel about it.

If you look at my cognitive functions scores posted in the INTJ thread, you will see that I do use higher Ti than Te.

So if I used weird functions during this interactions, it makes sense.

I am not an ENTP though.

Besides, I am sort of sick about debating my type since almost everyone has a different idea of it. It seems like ENTP is the psychosomatic illness of type. If it doesn't fit anywhere else, it must be an ENTP.

When you put me against real entps like Timeless or Entropy you can see I am nothing like then and obviously lack the Fe.

Heh. Really?

If you would just agree to be ESTP, then the whole doing, promoting, negotiating trip you've been working on this teacher wouldn't have to be out there marring the fine INTJ brand we've all got going back here.

It's all the integrity and the feeling that's screaming iz not INTJ. You've got the feeling out there, demanding attention, expecting reciprocation. It's all floating around the place, meant to dictate to this poor excuse for an educator that she's supposed to meet you half way. (And then you close the trap and she's suckered into doing the right thing.)
 

Poki

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Heh. Really?

If you would just agree to be ESTP, then the whole doing, promoting, negotiating trip you've been working on this teacher wouldn't have to be out there marring the fine INTJ brand we've all got going back here.

It's all the integrity and the feeling that's screaming iz not INTJ. You've got the feeling out there, demanding attention, expecting reciprocation. It's all floating around the place, meant to dictate to this poor excuse for an educator that she's supposed to meet you half way. (And then you close the trap and she's suckered into doing the right thing.)

What you said sounds like Fe to me :doh:
 

Jaguar

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If you would just agree to be ESTP, then the whole doing, promoting, negotiating trip you've been working on this teacher wouldn't have to be out there marring the fine INTJ brand we've all got going back here.

Fine INTJ brand? Is that why a male INTJ entered a thread to tell another male INTJ:

" I just wanted to tell you I think you're disgusting. Have a nice day."

:hi:
 
T

ThatGirl

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Heh. Really?

If you would just agree to be ESTP, then the whole doing, promoting, negotiating trip you've been working on this teacher wouldn't have to be out there marring the fine INTJ brand we've all got going back here.

It's all the integrity and the feeling that's screaming iz not INTJ. You've got the feeling out there, demanding attention, expecting reciprocation. It's all floating around the place, meant to dictate to this poor excuse for an educator that she's supposed to meet you half way. (And then you close the trap and she's suckered into doing the right thing.)

I never realized integrity was type related. By all means, please refer me to the type, you believe, actually has some.
 

skylights

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^ well, that's been obvious since your first post, hasn't it?

kalach does have a point though. i'm not saying that all ENFPs have integrity or that ESTPs don't, or any such generalization, but he has a good point about how you've handled the situation in a way rather foreign to what would seem to be typical Te and Fi usage.

relatedly... ENFP integrity, at least, would certainly seem to be anchored in Fi. my guess, types' integrity tends to lie in their top J function.

Jaguar said:
Fine INTJ brand? Is that why a male INTJ entered a thread to tell another male INTJ:
" I just wanted to tell you I think you're disgusting. Have a nice day."
that does sound like typical Te and Fi usage. brief and genuine... though not particularly suave, lol.
 

Thalassa

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Fine INTJ brand? Is that why a male INTJ entered a thread to tell another male INTJ:

" I just wanted to tell you I think you're disgusting. Have a nice day."

:hi:

That's INTJ dry humor right there. :heart:

It's not for everyone.
 

Kalach

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Where did that "you're disgusting" post happen? I remember seeing it but forget where and it's not showing up on search. I also remember thinking at the time that there were usurpers and brand assassins at the gates again.


And Kalach does not have a point about ENFPs having integrity. He was making a joke inasmuch as this thread's eponymous "ENFP" has caused distress upset irritation for ThatGirl by refusing to alter a judgment, and since such a refusal has at least the form of "integrity", being as it is a resistance to external influence, then we have here a humorous juxtaposition of some sort. But I forget what sort.
 
T

ThatGirl

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If that was integrity, people need to increase the quality of the principles they stand on.
 
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