• You are currently viewing our forum as a guest, which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community, you will have access to additional post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), view blogs, respond to polls, upload content, and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, so please join our community today! Just click here to register. You should turn your Ad Blocker off for this site or certain features may not work properly. If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us by clicking here.

[INFJ] Evil Infjs

Danbenyo

New member
Joined
Oct 4, 2010
Messages
26
MBTI Type
INXP
Enneagram
5
:devil:? Indeed.
How do you deal with those kind if people?
Its not a blog so I aint gonna tell my story, but what is the way to deal with those kind of people?
Dont get me wrong, I love INFJ, I have INFJ friend but this one used to be my friend and I really trusted him, eaven when he consistently back stabbing me. He scar me for life, he is not very smart, he got a short temper, but man he is bad.
Should I finaly confront? Im pretty scare from this guy willing to go to DARK places to remain his ego.
plz give me some tips.
 

Forever_Jung

Active member
Joined
May 23, 2009
Messages
2,644
MBTI Type
ESFJ
:devil:? Indeed.
How do you deal with those kind if people?
Its not a blog so I aint gonna tell my story, but what is the way to deal with those kind of people?
Dont get me wrong, I love INFJ, I have INFJ friend but this one used to be my friend and I really trusted him, eaven when he consistently back stabbing me. He scar me for life, he is not very smart, he got a short temper, but man he is bad.
Should I finaly confront? Im pretty scare from this guy willing to go to DARK places to remain his ego.
plz give me some tips.

An INFJ with a short temper who you're afraid to confront? That's a rarity! I have never dealt with such a dark INFJ (I only know a couple other INFJs, and they're very agreeable people), so I don't know what to tell you.
 

Arclight

Permabanned
Joined
Nov 5, 2009
Messages
3,177
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
6w5
Criticism is what makes INFJs evil.. Before that happens .. The worst they are is most likely, just a bit oblivious to things and how their behaviors might affect those around them. Maybe a bit controlling.

The problem is bringing it up.. How do you criticize someone who dies every time they are criticized??

I have tried to love 2 INFJs .. so please don't give me the usual "it's how you deliver it" .. I am very creative and accommodating.. I have tried everything. I have stuck with what was recommended to a T.. Still doesn't work..
Some INFJs just refuse to be wrong,admit they made a mistake, are inappropriate bad or flawed (Human?). Tell them you hurt.. They don't care, you've insulted them.. Tell them you love them, and that the only reason you brought it up is because it hurt you and all you want is to prevent further hurt in the future. It doesn't matter.. Your hurt doesn't matter.. You have hurt them by being critical.. and That's IT!!! you are now in evil INFJ territory.. The only way out is total submission or to walk away..

So How do you deal with a butt hurt INFJ who can't see 2 inches beyond themselves?

I don't know either. :(
 

Danbenyo

New member
Joined
Oct 4, 2010
Messages
26
MBTI Type
INXP
Enneagram
5
Arclight, we meant diffrent things.
Im tallking about a INFJ that his self image is so poor that he have to hurt others that he see as a threat, and he have no shame hitting u in the balls while ur shaking his hand.
For your problem, I think u should just let it chill, wait for the right time/opprutunity( when they need you/want to understand the problem they didnt notice) and say what U have to say in His\Her face, Worked for me.
 

OrangeAppled

Sugar Hiccup
Joined
Mar 20, 2009
Messages
7,626
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Sounds a bit like my INFJ aunt. I adore her and get compared to her a lot by family (so this criticism is not as harsh as it seems; and she does have good qualities), but she might qualify as an Evil INFJ (and yes, she has tested INFJ & even gone to an MBTI seminar & verified it). I'm going to illustrate with a detailed description of her flaws, because I know many can't imagine the all mighty INFJ type ever being a mere mortal with flaws.

1) She is very much a "dish it out, but can't take it" type. She can say extremely nasty, mean things to people in the heat of emotion, and you had better forgive her later, but if you do it to her, she'll hold a grudge for years over how awful you were to her (she'll be "traumatized" and blah blah). I may be sensitive also, but I get over stuff way faster, and I know if I dish it out, then I have it coming back to me & can't gripe about it.

2) Has a really, really bad temper that she takes out on people a bit too easily. Worst of the FJs in my family; and she has no shame about it & will never apologize later. Sometimes her sharp tongue is funny. She'll insult strangers in public by making purposely loud comments about them to her friends/family. I have to admit, it's hilarious & we egg her on. However, when her sharp tongue terms on someone close to her, it's shocking how cruel she is. She once was mad at her ISTx husband, and in a store when it came time to pay, she took money out of her purse, tossed it on the ground and said to him "Pick it up and pay" in front of a line of people. How humiliating and emasculating for him... Before she had couple's therapy she did stuff like that a LOT to him.

3) Has possibly never uttered the words "I'm sorry" in her whole life. Like too many INFJs, there's an arrogance about their rightness, so that they can never humble themselves to admit they were wrong. The other person always has to make the bridge first because they never see their part in it; too quick to criticize others, and an aversion to self-scrutiny. I cringe every time my ISFJ mom has to extend the olive branch with her sister, when my aunt was the one who crossed the line (she called my mom a "stupid cow" once when my mom emailed her to tell her their mom, my gma, was very ill in the hospital, implying my mom was trying to lay a guilt trip by telling her about it - who does that?!).

4) Manipulates people's sympathy to get her way or hide the truth. When she was a kid, my mom said she played up her asthma with their dad to get attention and her way. As an adult, she does this to some degree. It's a lot sneakier than open victim-playing though. Her husband and her separated for a bit years ago, and she successfully painted him a jerk to others; anyone who witnessed scenes like the above mentioned store example could sympathize with him a bit though....

5) Two-faced. She's on the side of whoever she is talking to, eager to criticize whoever is not there.

6) Massive hypocrite. She'll talk on and on about being vegan and boycotting McDonalds and all her green peace crap, but then she'll start eating meat again when her vegan diet causes her to gain weight (too many carbs). She gets fast food all the time, because she does not like to cook and is a working mom; out of convenience, she'll break her boycott against McDonald's because she's to tired to go out of her way to another drive through. The inconsistency with her beliefs and behavior is astounding to me. To an FP, this kind of inconsistency is inexcusable, especially when accompanied by a shamelessness. She justifies it so easily in her own mind (Ni perspective shift?). Also, she can go on and on about her beliefs, however much they contradict yours, but don't you dare mention your beliefs that contradict hers, or she gets all huffy & accuses you of guilt-tripping.

7) Bossy in a way that insults other people's intelligence, and just butts in where it's not her place. She tried to plan the menu to my HS grad party - even though she was not attending it. She once sent a list of foods her son could and could not eat when staying with us (ridiculous stuff like "only organic beef", and he can't drink out of plastic cups :rolli: ). For many years, my mom trusted her to watch me as a child, without any detailed set of instructions, before my aunt was even a mother herself. My mom has raised two kids; it's not like she's going to poison her nephew.... Plus, as we took care of most of his expenses while he stayed with us, it was very rude to expect us to go out and buy special food for him. This is even more ridiculous considering my aunt hardly cooks. Her family eats out all the time (I stayed with them for a summer once). My mom, however, cooks everything from scratch and we have wide pallets. My cousin is picky about food and prefers processed packaged stuff, because that's what my aunt feeds him.

8) Snobby, but pretends she is not. She'll wail on about how materialistic SoCal is (she's in NorCal), but then makes fun of how people in her hippy town dress. She's always been into name brand clothing. The label is more important than the style to her. It can be the most bland dress ever, but if it's a designer label, then she likes it. She acts picky about food quality in restaurants, but then cooks packaged stuff and feeds fast food to her family a lot. She's very status conscience & places a lot of emphasis on getting degrees and having impressive job titles (especially for her son), but yet, she never finished college herself and has some non-descript office job. This sort of goes hand-in-hand with the hypocrite thing...

9) Not affectionate. Her personality is only warm in that she compliments people a lot and can be outgoing socially (not a shy introvert). She hates hugging and sentimental expression though. I would have typed her a T (I thought eNTJ maybe), but I realize now she is very Fe, just not typical soft Fe.
 

Arclight

Permabanned
Joined
Nov 5, 2009
Messages
3,177
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
6w5
Arclight, we meant diffrent things.
Im tallking about a INFJ that his self image is so poor that he have to hurt others that he see as a threat, and he have no shame hitting u in the balls while ur shaking his hand.
For your problem, I think u should just let it chill, wait for the right time/opprutunity( when they need you/want to understand the problem they didnt notice) and say what U have to say in His\Her face, Worked for me.

Yeah.. I am sure my impatience doesn't help.. But I hurt and I need that to be attended to and if by being hurt I am hurting the INFJ ..It's defiantly a deadly combo.
 

Danbenyo

New member
Joined
Oct 4, 2010
Messages
26
MBTI Type
INXP
Enneagram
5
Bomb their bunkers.

Ur right, I thought about it and I come up with a plan. This guy isnt that smart after all. Ill update with the result to help others that have the same problems with an INFJ.
 

Forever_Jung

Active member
Joined
May 23, 2009
Messages
2,644
MBTI Type
ESFJ
Sounds a bit like my INFJ aunt. I adore her and get compared to her a lot by family (so this criticism is not as harsh as it seems; and she does have good qualities), but she might qualify as an Evil INFJ (and yes, she has tested INFJ & even gone to an MBTI seminar & verified it). I'm going to illustrate with a detailed description of her flaws, because I know many can't imagine the all mighty INFJ type ever being a mere mortal with flaws.

1) She is very much a "dish it out, but can't take it" type. She can say extremely nasty, mean things to people in the heat of emotion, and you had better forgive her later, but if you do it to her, she'll hold a grudge for years over how awful you were to her (she'll be "traumatized" and blah blah). I may be sensitive also, but I get over stuff way faster, and I know if I dish it out, then I have it coming back to me & can't gripe about it.

2) Has a really, really bad temper that she takes out on people a bit too easily. Worst of the FJs in my family; and she has no shame about it & will never apologize later. Sometimes her sharp tongue is funny. She'll insult strangers in public by making purposely loud comments about them to her friends/family. I have to admit, it's hilarious & we egg her on. However, when her sharp tongue terms on someone close to her, it's shocking how cruel she is. She once was mad at her ISTx husband, and in a store when it came time to pay, she took money out of her purse, tossed it on the ground and said to him "Pick it up and pay" in front of a line of people. How humiliating and emasculating for him... Before she had couple's therapy she did stuff like that a LOT to him.

3) Has possibly never uttered the words "I'm sorry" in her whole life. Like too many INFJs, there's an arrogance about their rightness, so that they can never humble themselves to admit they were wrong. The other person always has to make the bridge first because they never see their part in it; too quick to criticize others, and an aversion to self-scrutiny. I cringe every time my ISFJ mom has to extend the olive branch with her sister, when my aunt was the one who crossed the line (she called my mom a "stupid cow" once when my mom emailed her to tell her their mom, my gma, was very ill in the hospital, implying my mom was trying to lay a guilt trip by telling her about it - who does that?!).

4) Manipulates people's sympathy to get her way or hide the truth. When she was a kid, my mom said she played up her asthma with their dad to get attention and her way. As an adult, she does this to some degree. It's a lot sneakier than open victim-playing though. Her husband and her separated for a bit years ago, and she successfully painted him a jerk to others; anyone who witnessed scenes like the above mentioned store example could sympathize with him a bit though....

5) Two-faced. She's on the side of whoever she is talking to, eager to criticize whoever is not there.

6) Massive hypocrite. She'll talk on and on about being vegan and boycotting McDonalds and all her green peace crap, but then she'll start eating meat again when her vegan diet causes her to gain weight (too many carbs). She gets fast food all the time, because she does not like to cook and is a working mom; out of convenience, she'll break her boycott against McDonald's because she's to tired to go out of her way to another drive through. The inconsistency with her beliefs and behavior is astounding to me. To an FP, this kind of inconsistency is inexcusable, especially when accompanied by a shamelessness. She justifies it so easily in her own mind (Ni perspective shift?). Also, she can go on and on about her beliefs, however much they contradict yours, but don't you dare mention your beliefs that contradict hers, or she gets all huffy & accuses you of guilt-tripping.

7) Bossy in a way that insults other people's intelligence, and just butts in where it's not her place. She tried to plan the menu to my HS grad party - even though she was not attending it. She once sent a list of foods her son could and could not eat when staying with us (ridiculous stuff like "only organic beef", and he can't drink out of plastic cups :rolli: ). For many years, my mom trusted her to watch me as a child, without any detailed set of instructions, before my aunt was even a mother herself. My mom has raised two kids; it's not like she's going to poison her nephew.... Plus, as we took care of most of his expenses while he stayed with us, it was very rude to expect us to go out and buy special food for him. This is even more ridiculous considering my aunt hardly cooks. Her family eats out all the time (I stayed with them for a summer once). My mom, however, cooks everything from scratch and we have wide pallets. My cousin is picky about food and prefers processed packaged stuff, because that's what my aunt feeds him.

8) Snobby, but pretends she is not. She'll wail on about how materialistic SoCal is (she's in NorCal), but then makes fun of how people in her hippy town dress. She's always been into name brand clothing. The label is more important than the style to her. It can be the most bland dress ever, but if it's a designer label, then she likes it. She acts picky about food quality in restaurants, but then cooks packaged stuff and feeds fast food to her family a lot. She's very status conscience & places a lot of emphasis on getting degrees and having impressive job titles (especially for her son), but yet, she never finished college herself and has some non-descript office job. This sort of goes hand-in-hand with the hypocrite thing...

9) Not affectionate. Her personality is only warm in that she compliments people a lot and can be outgoing socially (not a shy introvert). She hates hugging and sentimental expression though. I would have typed her a T (I thought eNTJ maybe), but I realize now she is very Fe, just not typical soft Fe.

This is a very good dissection of a mean INFJ. I hope I don`t come across like that to my family, but I can actually see a lot of those things in myself. Maybe not that bad, but sometimes I am two-faced and paint other people as the bad guys instead of owning up to my own flaws and misdeeds. Ever since I was little I have questioned my sense of integrity. I think with inferior Se, it`s hard for me to see myself objectively. When I do realize the truth and stop shifting perspectives to ignore it, I feel completely awful. I just want to crawl out of my skin and be someone else.
 

Thalassa

Permabanned
Joined
May 3, 2009
Messages
25,183
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx
My guess is that an evil INFJ would be hypercritical, hypocritical, and not entirely unlike a very cold and status conscious ISFJ. Except possibly even more pretentious, like being "more politically correct than you"...kind of what OrangeAppled was talking about with her aunt and the vegan/organic stuff but then turning around and making excuses for why she eats fast food.

I picture an evil INFJ as being an uptight, insanely judgemental, physically cold, overly liberal, hipster from hell.
 

Danbenyo

New member
Joined
Oct 4, 2010
Messages
26
MBTI Type
INXP
Enneagram
5
This guy is more of a dumbass with plan.
The best thing I can do is to let him rot in his own hate, But what will be the fun of that? The people want vendetta!!
 

Arclight

Permabanned
Joined
Nov 5, 2009
Messages
3,177
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
6w5
This guy is more of a dumbass with plan.
The best thing I can do is to let him rot in his own hate, But what will be the fun of that? The people want vendetta!!

So you want to kick someone when they are down? I can see why you and Mr INFJ don't get along ..
 

Danbenyo

New member
Joined
Oct 4, 2010
Messages
26
MBTI Type
INXP
Enneagram
5
No, you dont understand.
First of all I dont wanna kick any body that is down, I meant that he doesnt have the support.
He is terrible, abusing the weaks, manipulating,intriguieng, WAITNIG WHE SOMEBODY AT HIS WEAK SPOT AND THEN ACTING.
Its not only about MBTI u know. Not all the Infjs are good as they described, Ill quote Coppola:
" Then I thought, what's the difference between five good guys holding that kind of power and five bad guys? Just good intentions, and intentions can be corrupted."
Trust me I never meant harm, but this guy is really something.
And I realy like INFJ one of my best friends is a golden hearted INFJ
 

sleepy

Member
Joined
Dec 6, 2007
Messages
536
This thread was enlightening. Evil INFJs and bad Fe. How interesting. I may have figured something out, must think some more about it.
 

Lily flower

New member
Joined
Jun 28, 2010
Messages
930
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
2
As an INFJ, I have to at least defend my type a little bit. I think we are usually sweet. I always try to never insult anyone or hurt their feelings, and I am often told that I am an encourager.

I do admit to the accusation of thinking I am right in a disagreement, but don't most people think they are right?
 

Quay

Peaced
Joined
Feb 17, 2010
Messages
271
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
6w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I honestly think here isn't much you can do about a dark INFJ. Any self-improvement is gonna come from deep self-reflection, and it may take a trigger that he isn't aware he has to drop him into that mode.

I do want to say, if he begins "recovery", so to speak, be there to listen to him and help him through it just for kindness sake. It may restore his faith in humanity.

from my perspective anyway. :D
 

Aquarelle

Starcrossed Seafarer
Joined
Jun 16, 2010
Messages
3,144
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
so/sp
2) Has a really, really bad temper

3) Has possibly never uttered the words "I'm sorry" in her whole life.

7) Bossy in a way that insults other people's intelligence

This is a very good dissection of a mean INFJ. I hope I don`t come across like that to my family, but I can actually see a lot of those things in myself. Maybe not that bad, but sometimes I am two-faced and paint other people as the bad guys instead of owning up to my own flaws and misdeeds. Ever since I was little I have questioned my sense of integrity. I think with inferior Se, it`s hard for me to see myself objectively. When I do realize the truth and stop shifting perspectives to ignore it, I feel completely awful. I just want to crawl out of my skin and be someone else.

I admit that I can see certain degrees of these things - especially the ones I quoted above - in myself as well, or I have seen them in myself in the past. INFJs are imperfect human beings, just like every other type. But I think we do have the redeeming quality that we are very introspective, so we do examine ourselves closely, and if we can learn to be honest with ourselves (not the easiest thing to do), then we can be aware of our flaws and try to change them.

For example, I used to have a very bad temper. Part of that came, I think, from my INTJ father, who had a very bad temper when we were growing up. (He was never violent, though, and has very much mellowed out as he's gotten older.) But one day, I just realized that getting really angry didn't help anything - it didn't change the situation, it wasn't productive, and it only ended up making me miserable. Once I realized that, my temper instantly evaporated. Sometimes I still have to try to have patience with certain people and/or situations, but I don't burn with anger the way I used to.

I have definitely said "I'm sorry" before, but I admit it's not a terribly frequent occurrence. Of course, this is because most of the time I am right ;) :cheese:. But when I'm wrong, I sometimes have a hard time admitting, or even realizing it. That's something I've become a lot more aware of since I've been with my husband. One of his major criticisms of me is that I don't admit when I'm wrong. And since he brought that up to me, I've really tried to get better about that, but still, I'm not perfect, and that is one of my flaws.

I don't think I'm terribly bossy most of the time, but in certain situations, like if I see a more efficient way to do something that someone else is doing inefficiently, then I can become impatient and bossy. But I'm aware of that too, and working on it.

After re-reading the above, I realized I kind of make it sound like I'm aware of all of my flaws and working on them, thereby making me closer to perfect. I don't mean to sound that way. I'm sure there are many flaws I'm not aware of, or things about me that I don't consider flaws but that nonetheless annoy people. :yes:
 

Razvan

New member
Joined
Aug 28, 2010
Messages
26
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
9v8
This guy is more of a dumbass with plan.
The best thing I can do is to let him rot in his own hate, But what will be the fun of that? The people want vendetta!!

The best thing you can do is try to help him, without judging him. Even if you know he is wrong, the best thing you can do is be kind to him and try to use reason to tell him when he is wrong. Use his own system of values, even if he will deny that he is wrong, inside he will know it and all you can do is be patient and apply the policy mentioned before. Now I know that is really hard to apply and if you can't the best thing you can do is to back away and ignore him, yes, let him stew in his own soup if you cannot be of any help, but pushing him over the edge will only make things worse.

Now what I have just said should work in my opinion for any personality type, INFJ or not and also, vengeance will never work. If all of us started applying the "eye for an eye" rule, we'd all be left blind. :D In your case all you will succeed is to make him feel miserable and he will return your "favour" so basically both of you would be living a miserable life. Unfortunately, with unhealthy people, INFJ or whatever there is not much you can do, maybe only get them to do some therapy, but the important thing is that they must want to be helped.
 

Mysterious15

New member
Joined
Mar 8, 2011
Messages
48
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
5
INFJ or not that person is an individual, and as an individual he must have had some changing factor in his life to act like this. I don't think it depends much on the personality type, even an INFJ who has been under the influence of bad people/conditions will turn rotten. Its in human nature, nobody can stay an angel after being maltreated, and I don't know what this person's background is but he must have been through a lot to be so emotionless and apathetic to other people. For him doing bad to others won't count so much since people have done bad to him. Not every one is strong willed and doesn't change after a trial, the proof can be seen in this world. I recommend you to just leave the person be, they will not listen to anyone, and one day maybe years later they will regret their own actions. And let me tell you that is punishment enough for an INFJ, hope this helps......:)
 
Top