User Tag List

First 34567 Last

Results 41 to 50 of 135

  1. #41
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sx
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    25,301

    Default

    I talk to an Si dom sometimes all day long.

    My ESFJ ex and I, one of our main points of connection were our long conversations. We still write each other long e-mails sometimes.

    There's this thing apart from MBTI called "shared interests" and it seems to me you're presuming that the Ne dom has not developed their Si (and perhaps you haven't) and the Si dom doesn't use their Ne.

    But sure, okay, what would I talk to with an ISTJ about all day long? I've got no clue. I've never been put in such a position. My grandfather wasn't very talkative and his idea of spending time together was each reading a book on seperate chairs in the same room.

  2. #42
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    ISFJ
    Posts
    6,020

    Default

    Maybe you're presuming I don't know ISTJs that share my interests (actually quite a few) and can't tell the difference of talking with them from talking with a Ni dom or a Ne dom or a Se dom. It's different.

    But not here to say someone else won't prefer it. Just find it very weird.

  3. #43
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/so
    Posts
    18,086

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by IZthe411 View Post
    So would you call your lack of desire a willingness to not adapt?
    what does this mean? are you asking if i lacked the desire to want to adapt?

    obviously all i know is myself and my experience it could be different for others but what i see is that the two might be drawn to each other sometimes because we're so different...maybe we find each others quirks charming in the beginning...maybe we unknowingly project some of our own characteristics onto each other because it's hard to imagine someone not feeling the same about certain things that to us seem so obviously right...so...really iz...it's not even about adapting...it's about two people with completely opposite motivations...so you compromise constantly...but all the while you're thinking this is so stupid...or so petty...and why is this so important...this is stupid...and you do it constantly...both of you...and it's annoying...and neither of you feel valued...you both disagree with each other's whole being...just...it's not about adapting...at least not in my view.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  4. #44
    Senior Member 2XtremeENFP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    3w4
    Posts
    446

    Default

    what do you mean enfp blindspots?

  5. #45
    Senior Member Chloe's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Posts
    2,204

    Default

    i know a guy who is married to ISTJ - boy, he is miserable. Its like he is completely alone in that marriage. And she is not of intellectual ISTJs, like my sister is for ex, or m ex-bf who liked bullshititng a lot, which is fhe biggest problem in their marriage. Onls thing thats keeping him in are his children and fear of letting her go; because he loves her but all his needs are unfullfiled in that marriage except maybe for safety.:/

    i pretty much expect it to be like lady x's experience... i was with an istj but it wasnt serious relationship enough.

    i wonder would ISFJ make a difference?!:/

  6. #46
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sx
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    25,301

    Default

    I think ISFJs give and need a lot more attention. Couldn't really comment on how that manifests in a LTR, though.

  7. #47
    Senior Member animenagai's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    NeFi
    Enneagram
    4w3
    Posts
    1,573

    Default

    IZ, the ENFP's here trying to be negative. I do think that in general, the combination is not a natural one. I think most ISTJ - ENFP relationships don't mesh very well and that's all these guys are trying to say. It's incredibly important to find people you work with quite naturally and sometimes, you can care for someone with all your heart all the while knowing that you can only get so close. Of course, that doesn't mean that no ENFP's can work with ISTJ's, but do understand that it's a minority and expect that.

    If you want any constructive criticism, maybe try doing something eventful together like watching a movie, going ice-skating, paint balling etc. Things like that usually bridge the conversation gap quite well and can give your more opportunities to really get to know each other. That's all I have though :P
    Chimera of Filth

    A gruesome beast with dripping flesh
    Clings to me as a sick fixture
    My throbbing heart it gnawed apart
    It stalks and hunts me through mirrors

  8. #48
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sx
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    25,301

    Default

    OMG I was lying here falling asleep and remembered one of my closest friends from back in NC is an ENFP and is married to an ISTJ. They have a child together, and she said he brings a wonderful stability and calm to her life that she didn't have with others. She says they have a "slow burn" as opposed to wild passion, and it gives her a feeling of it being a lasting thing. They've been together for at least five years - I have to check - but it's significant enough, maybe even longer than that.

    She said something to the effect that emotionally he was slow to come around, and she didn't want to put all of her eggs in one basket at first, but that came to realize that he was worth the slower process it took for him to commit - you know that whole thing where they have the Great Wall at first, but once you're in YOU'RE IN. That sort of thing.

    She says he handles her moods really well, really calmly and rationally, and that he's a wonderful husband and provider, but that sometimes she has trouble getting to him to take risks or try new things.

    I've seen no huge complaints from her, they seem to be happy from what she's told me about their relationship, it really seems to work for them.

  9. #49
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Socionics
    SLI None
    Posts
    9,635

    Default

    perhaps it's different for me as a gay guy, but I find I'm mostly attracted to FP types because they're cute and playful

  10. #50
    Klingon Warrior Princess Patches's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    MBTI
    ISTJ
    Enneagram
    6w5 sp/sx
    Posts
    5,312

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Esoteric Wench View Post
    Also, I would be keenly sensitive to them being terse with me. My best friend in high school was an ISTJ and she made me cry more than once. Her bluntness and her lack of awareness about how what she said would be received by others both hurt and angered me.
    I'm inclined to agree with this from the opposite perspective - As an ISTJ, I would avoid dating an ENFP because they would not handle my coldness/bluntness well. I wouldn't be able offer them the kind of emotional support they needed. In a way, I would be borderline emotionally abusive to a more sensitive NFP - and it wouldn't be on purpose. That relationship just goes nowhere good.

    Quote Originally Posted by Moiety View Post
    And what's the problem with that? True love conquers all.
    I'll take financial stability and a good sex life over true love any day.

    (And in that single statement, I probably just confirmed several ENFPs fears about dating ISTJs. Please, don't judge all those other ISTJs based on my words. )
    “Everybody has a secret world inside of them. All of the people of the world, I mean everybody. No matter how dull and boring they are on the outside, inside
    them they've all got unimaginable, magnificent, wonderful, stupid, amazing worlds. Not just one world. Hundreds of them. Thousands maybe.” -Neil Gaiman

    ~

Similar Threads

  1. [ISTJ] NEED ADVICE PLEASE!! ESPECIALLY FROM AN ISTJ WOMAN!!
    By notgivingupjustyet in forum The SJ Guardhouse (ESFJ, ISFJ, ESTJ, ISTJ)
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 11-10-2016, 04:35 PM
  2. Greetings from an ISTJ
    By Patches in forum Welcomes and Introductions
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 07-17-2013, 02:16 PM
  3. [ISTJ] Thoughts From An ISTJ
    By FallaciaSonata in forum The SJ Guardhouse (ESFJ, ISFJ, ESTJ, ISTJ)
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 05-11-2009, 09:53 PM
  4. [ENTJ] Questions from an ENTJ
    By DiscoBiscuit in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 23
    Last Post: 04-26-2009, 01:46 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO