User Tag List

12 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 14

  1. #1
    Member bronson's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    MBTI
    ENFJ
    Enneagram
    3w4
    Socionics
    EIE
    Posts
    93

    Default Dichotomous Functions in an ENFJ?

    I've read on here that a persons various functions are utilised simultaneously rather than individually. However I feel that for me, particularly perhaps because of my personality type, I behave according to my two major functions separately. What I mean by that is that when I'm functioning in Fe I function in that alone, and then when I function in Ni I'm definitely not functioning in Fe.

    Maybe its just my lack of understanding, and I am aware that the various functions are all very different from one another hence their categorisations, but I feel that ENFJ's have two distinctly different functions that are quite difficult to reconcile.

    Fe is so energetic and lively, confident and vivacious. It's effective and engaging; people are influenced by me.

    Then I get sucked down into the often melancholic gully-trap of Ni that puts theories and concepts to the forefront of my mind that challenge all the social norms Fe is so smooth with, and starts randomly questioning and challenging the stupidity of all the ridiculously futile things people pursue in everyday life.

    Then when I flick back into Fe I have to work had to recover all the lost ground by acting out the farce again and saying 'sorry dont mind me don't know where all that shit came from' etc etc.


    Don't get me wrong, there are those lovely moments when it all comes together and I am able to relate my inarticulate Ni insights in the confident and expressive manner of Fe to (eg) a big group of strangers.

    Yet, most of the time I feel that when one switches on the other flicks off. And if something occurs that I need to process through Ni I will literally shut off on the spot from people and go into this dream - and everyone's like 'What's wrong with you? Still there?' but I can't help it.

    And I feel like most days are Fe days so everyone has this perception of me as that real friendly guy who knows everyone, but then they just get disapointed another day when I don't even notice them because I'm having a big old Ni day.

    Does anyone else ride on this seesaw?

    Am I not functioning as efficiently and productively as I could be?
    Last edited by bronson; 11-11-2010 at 08:10 AM. Reason: Typo

  2. #2
    That's my name biotch! JoSunshine's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    MBTI
    eNfj
    Enneagram
    2
    Posts
    660

    Default

    I think one of the hallmarks of ENFJ's is the internal "emotional roller coaster". It's not nearly as bad since I have gotten a bit older. I think it is about learning to be authentic and vulnerable by making sure my Fe isn't in conflict with my Ni. I'm better at letting people see my less pleasant, more controversial parts - even if it means they don't like me. I'm not nearly as popular as I used to be...what a relief! Life is getting easier. Does that make sense even?
    "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. " - Dr. Seuss
    I can't spell...get over it

    Slightly ENFJ, totally JoSunshine
    Extroverted (E) 52.5%........Introverted (I) 47.5%
    Intuitive (N) 65.63%..........Sensing (S) 34.38%
    Feeling (F) 55.56%............Thinking (T) 44.44%
    Judging (J) 51.43%............Perceiving (P) 48.57%

  3. #3
    Lungs & Lips Locked Unkindloving's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    MBTI
    ENFJ
    Enneagram
    4w5
    Socionics
    ENFj
    Posts
    2,900

    Default

    In terms of emoticons- my Fe alone can be very "" and my Ni alone is very "". Mine tend to compliment one another more often than not, but the moments where they act separately seem as if I've lost balance in myself for a brief time and am a bit of a pod person within my own body.

    I do find that I've actively sought out a lot of balance over the past 10 years, and have likely gone through the Fe/Ni highs and lows. I would say work to switch the balance. For me, it comes easier when I am more selective about the people I choose to interact with and Fe at. My Ni can haterade outside of my group, while my Fe is still intact with my group. You may just have to learn to utilize them both, but in different places.
    Hang on traveling woman - Don't sacrifice your plan
    Cause it will come back to you - Before you lose it on the man


    .:: DWTWD ::.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]


    2011 TypeC Exercise Challenge - My Weekly Goals: Cardio 4x. Yoga/Pilates 1x. Pushups 70.

    There is this thing keeping everyone's lungs and lips locked - It is called fear and it's seeing a great renaissance

  4. #4
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    MBTI
    eNFJ
    Enneagram
    4w3 sx/so
    Socionics
    eNFJ Ni
    Posts
    11,443

    Default

    I've been told I have a very distinct Fe mode and an Ni mode.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
    Neutral Good
    EII-Fi subtype, Ethical/Empath, Delta/Beta
    RLUEI, Choleric/Melancholic
    Inquistive/Limbic
    AIS Holland code
    Researcher: VDI-P
    Dramatic>Sensitive>Serious

  5. #5
    i love skylights's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 so/sx
    Socionics
    EII Ne
    Posts
    7,835

    Default

    ^ i think i see this in an ENFJ friend of mine. one second she's chatting warmly and lively and attending to people and the next she's staring hard at someone in the distance with a >:| face, and subsequently says something very insightful but only distantly related to the matter at hand.

  6. #6
    Senior Member TopherRed's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    MBTI
    ENFJ
    Enneagram
    2w3 so/sx
    Posts
    1,273

    Default

    I see Fe alone as a big thick rich field of brightly colored pizza. I see Ni as a big purple wave moving up and down through that field of pizza as seen from the side. When I was younger, the pizza would rise and dive like a magic carpet according to the big purple wave. Now the pizza is learning to observe, and swerve out of the purple wave's way; still observing where the wave is going, yet the pizza itself stays stable, catching the wave like wind on a birds' wings when it goes up, and avoiding it and gliding when the wave goes down.

    O.o I don't even know how to work Se and Ti into this mix. I suppose Se gives me the ability to counter the movement of the Ni-wave, and Ti gives me the ability to keep observing it, even when my pizza-Fe is not cruising with it.

    Cha, Ni is weird.
    Love is the point.

  7. #7
    Lungs & Lips Locked Unkindloving's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    MBTI
    ENFJ
    Enneagram
    4w5
    Socionics
    ENFj
    Posts
    2,900

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Fuzzcrossed View Post
    I see Fe alone as a big thick rich field of brightly colored pizza. I see Ni as a big purple wave moving up and down through that field of pizza as seen from the side. When I was younger, the pizza would rise and dive like a magic carpet according to the big purple wave. Now the pizza is learning to observe, and swerve out of the purple wave's way; still observing where the wave is going, yet the pizza itself stays stable, catching the wave like wind on a birds' wings when it goes up, and avoiding it and gliding when the wave goes down.

    O.o I don't even know how to work Se and Ti into this mix. I suppose Se gives me the ability to counter the movement of the Ni-wave, and Ti gives me the ability to keep observing it, even when my pizza-Fe is not cruising with it.

    Cha, Ni is weird.
    So this is what the male ENFJ language conjures? Interesting.
    ...Now I'm hungry. :noms on hummus and pretends it is super duper delicious:
    Hang on traveling woman - Don't sacrifice your plan
    Cause it will come back to you - Before you lose it on the man


    .:: DWTWD ::.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]


    2011 TypeC Exercise Challenge - My Weekly Goals: Cardio 4x. Yoga/Pilates 1x. Pushups 70.

    There is this thing keeping everyone's lungs and lips locked - It is called fear and it's seeing a great renaissance

  8. #8
    Senior Member TopherRed's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    MBTI
    ENFJ
    Enneagram
    2w3 so/sx
    Posts
    1,273

    Default

    Love is the point.

  9. #9
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Posts
    13

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by bronson View Post
    I've read on here that a persons various functions are utilised simultaneously rather than individually. However I feel that for me, particularly perhaps because of my personality type, I behave according to my two major functions separately. What I mean by that is that when I'm functioning in Fe I function in that alone, and then when I function in Ni I'm definitely not functioning in Fe.

    Maybe its just my lack of understanding, and I am aware that the various functions are all very different from one another hence their categorisations, but I feel that ENFJ's have two distinctly different functions that are quite difficult to reconcile.

    Fe is so energetic and lively, confident and vivacious. It's effective and engaging; people are influenced by me.

    Then I get sucked down into the often melancholic gully-trap of Ni that puts theories and concepts to the forefront of my mind that challenge all the social norms Fe is so smooth with, and starts randomly questioning and challenging the stupidity of all the ridiculously futile things people pursue in everyday life.

    Then when I flick back into Fe I have to work had to recover all the lost ground by acting out the farce again and saying 'sorry dont mind me don't know where all that shit came from' etc etc.


    Don't get me wrong, there are those lovely moments when it all comes together and I am able to relate my inarticulate Ni insights in the confident and expressive manner of Fe to (eg) a big group of strangers.

    Yet, most of the time I feel that when one switches on the other flicks off. And if something occurs that I need to process through Ni I will literally shut off on the spot from people and go into this dream - and everyone's like 'What's wrong with you? Still there?' but I can't help it.

    And I feel like most days are Fe days so everyone has this perception of me as that real friendly guy who knows everyone, but then they just get disapointed another day when I don't even notice them because I'm having a big old Ni day.

    Does anyone else ride on this seesaw?

    Am I not functioning as efficiently and productively as I could be?
    You know, its like you stole the thoughts right out of my head.

    Its whats been running through my mind as an ENFJ I dont really relate to this Fe harmonious loving overly friendly type.. I mean those are idealistic qualities I strive for..but I relate more to the calculating Ni..Like, Fe its very much suited for an Si user.. ESFJ. Were both Fe doms but in my experience we're worlds apart. Im more inclined to enjoy NTs ideas and thoughts than SFs who quickly irritate me in a way I cant describe.

    I guess the question remains, how do I genuinely keep up the act of Fe comeraderie, the sense of "life is perfect" like most ESFJs, with the other me who prefers my own distance and melancholic privacy and skepticism of the status quo. Im waiting on Jung specialists to define this polarization of Fe and Ni cause I dont have a clue as to what is the answer to this.

    Thing is, if my Thinking function were anywhere as strong as my Intuition function, I think i'd be happy being a bonafide IxTx type. I'm jealous of how detached they can be and in their own world.. Fe always pulls me back so I have to keep up as soon as I fall deep into my intuitive state

  10. #10
    i love skylights's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 so/sx
    Socionics
    EII Ne
    Posts
    7,835

    Default

    ^ so do you feel that Fe and Ni pull you in opposite directions? not just in and out, i mean, that dichotomy is a given, but towards/away from people? it sounds like you're kind of irritated with the "duties" of Fe - that it's just an act... so what if you just stopped acting?

    i don't really have a good juicy jungian answer for you but my thought is that maybe if you allowed yourself some time to just get away from people and indulge your Ni, you could return to Fe when you felt like you really wanted it, instead of feeling forced to come back. i don't know if you're like this too, but my ENFJ friend (same one that i was talking about earlier) has difficulty taking time off for herself - she's worried about what will happen if she stops interacting... she gets overextended and cynical if she doesn't, though, and she returns much happier if she takes some time to herself to shut out from the world for a while.

    actually to pull it into jungian/beebean (haha beebean?) terms, Ni is in your Mother/"Supportive Parent" function role - i wonder if maybe it would help for you to fall back on it some more, even if that means letting Fe drop the reins for a while. then i think you can move to integrating them more... i think ideally, as the Supportive Parent, Ni can be used for Fe to "bounce off" of - like for it to affirm the direction you want to take, and to help steer you when you're tired or not sure where to go.
    Last edited by skylights; 11-22-2010 at 03:58 PM. Reason: read more from beebe, adding

Similar Threads

  1. [ENFJ] ISFP males in the eyes of an ENFJ females
    By floral87 in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 09-25-2011, 04:07 AM
  2. Replies: 3
    Last Post: 02-13-2011, 01:35 PM
  3. [ENFJ] Was/is in love with an ENFJ.. can't understand how he feels, help!
    By sarahd242 in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 25
    Last Post: 01-25-2009, 07:32 PM
  4. MBTI functions in an RPG...
    By Athenian200 in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 26
    Last Post: 11-11-2007, 12:39 PM
  5. [JCF] How my Ti functions (crude representation) vs. F in an "argument"
    By MacGuffin in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 09-20-2007, 06:13 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO