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  1. #31
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    ^ To add a bit more....Fi-ers may not instinctively pick up on the sort of universal appropriateness Fe picks up on, but we do pick up on individual standards. So if you set the tone, then we may know how to proceed. If you call a lot or at certain times of day, I think Ne sees patterns & Fi devises a general concept of how to deal with you. Like skylights, I'm sort of petrified of annoying people & for every reason to call I may think of 5 not to; and it's probably bad past experiences blown seriously out of proportion in my mind due to hypersensitivity. I have some social anxiety though, but it seems like for even non shy NFPs there's some over-thinking involved in relationships, and it helps when the other person is direct about what they'd like/need. I find myself a lot more flexible than others, so if they call me, then I am usually cool with it, but I find other people have all these weird rules, and I'd rather to wait & see what they are before inadvertently crossing one.
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

  2. #32
    Senior Member TopherRed's Avatar
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    Very insightful my dears, thank you.
    Love is the point.

  3. #33
    Magical Firelie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Arclight View Post
    IN my experiences??.. Intriguing conflict.
    Hmm, that's interesting. Well, we certainly find each other intriguing, but there have been no conflicts as of yet. It is a fairly new relationship, though.

  4. #34
    Senior Member TopherRed's Avatar
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    If the two of you survive the entry into each other's atmospheres, the conflict will become a passionate benefit to the relationship. But it's a pride thing. If both of you can tolerate AND respect the other's pride, then it should be a successful relationship.

    P.S.- If you haven't come across this problem yet, don't anticipate it will happen for sure; this has been my experience though. My best friend is an INTJ.
    Love is the point.

  5. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by Firelie View Post
    Hmm, that's interesting. Well, we certainly find each other intriguing, but there have been no conflicts as of yet. It is a fairly new relationship, though.
    Well I was just going on personal experiences .. and of course there are always exceptions to every generality. All it takes is two people to value each other and no issue is insurmountable.

  6. #36
    Magical Firelie's Avatar
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    No worries, I won't judge my relationship based on other people's experiences. I was just saying. We do find each other incredibly odd at times, but it's more endearing than conflict-inducing.

  7. #37
    Senior Member Neutralpov's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post
    I don't think this is a fair statement. INFPs tend to show they care in non Fe ways, so if you're looking for Fe displays of caring, then no, you're not going to get it. However, that does not mean INFPs do not care; we may care so intensely that it's almost impossible to express.

    I've been on the other end of both an INFJ & ENFJ who only talk about themselves & only call when they're down & need to vent. I think this has more to do with NFs attracting broken people in need of a listening ear than any particular type being only takers & not givers (but sometimes those broken people are other NFs...). The other issue is, I know some ENFJs who refuse to open up & keep deflecting the conversation away from them; what's a person supposed to do then?
    Easy answer imo. You have to be trustworthy, reciprocal (give and take is healthy), sincere, and vulnerable yourself. If you aren't these that is why you hit a locked gate.


    P.S. Bonus quality is awesomely loving in conflict resolution with us and believe the best automatically of us.

  8. #38
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by HeatherC View Post
    Easy answer imo. You have to be trustworthy, reciprocal (give and take is healthy), sincere, and vulnerable yourself. If you aren't these that is why you hit a locked gate.
    I don't think it would be inflated of me to say that I possess those qualities; in fact, I'd say those are quite basic strengths associated with INFPs in general. It doesn't appear quite that simple, from my perspective....
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

  9. #39
    Senior Member ceecee's Avatar
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    They're a big, warm, furry blanket of awesome.
    I like to rock n' roll all night and *part* of every day. I usually have errands... I can only rock from like 1-3.

  10. #40
    Senior Member TopherRed's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post
    I don't think it would be inflated of me to say that I possess those qualities; in fact, I'd say those are quite basic strengths associated with INFPs in general. It doesn't appear quite that simple, from my perspective....
    If only I would be so lucky to find that someday, my dear.

    Quote Originally Posted by ceecee View Post
    They're a big, warm, furry blanket of awesome.
    *bear hugs himself*
    Love is the point.

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