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Thread: be yourself.

  1. #11
    Senior Member Synapse's Avatar
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    Oh oh, I know, I know. Puts my hand up.

    Your tapping into your game face and and your poker face.
    You know like gently exfoliating your skin one minute then bungee jumping the next.
    Shifting gear sticks between energy states and moods and adapting to the energy states you find yourself in. Of course this is also an intuitive thing more than an introverted or extroverted thing I think. Its like when your in class your in a focus state where as in a playground totally different and at work different again. You show different energy states for different energy states maybe.

  2. #12
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phoenix13 View Post
    In my mind, insecurity would make one speak less for fear of being judged. ENFPs are almost always criticized for being TOO hyper, not not hyper enough. Rachelinpa is being accused of artificially pumping herself up in front of the ISTP's friends, which isn't something an ENFP would do if they feared being judged.
    Well i can imagine a scenario where the ENFP would sort of force extroversion, force the being hyper to get feedback.

    That's insecurity too.

  3. #13
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Moiety View Post
    Does not compute.
    what about it doesn't compute? doesn't everyone adapt to situations somewhat? one is quieter in a nice restaurant; louder outside playing tag. spontaneous on vacation; focused during test-taking. to me it seems very natural

    Quote Originally Posted by phoenix13 View Post
    You're assuming that she isn't being herself. Her point is that she IS being herself. ENFPs by nature adapt to their environments while remaining grounded by their values. To act similarly across a spectrum of situations would require tremendous self-control, because it is NOT NATURAL FOR US. Insecurity has nothing to do with it.


    it'd also, ironically, require... well, not being ourselves. to act the same all the time... that'd be awful. i couldn't be all the things that i am.

    we're actually probably more likely to change if we are secure, because we don't feel like we're restricted by needing to be accepted.

    Quote Originally Posted by Arclight View Post
    You can never be anyone else but yourself. No matter how you behave.. It's you.. who else is it going to be?

    On that note.. no one behaves with 100% consistency. Moods ,situations and the people present at any given time will alter your behavior.

    When I am with a girlfriend is not how I am going to behave when I am with my mother or at work.

    No matter.. Each behavior is still me,despite how different they might appear to an observer.
    yes exactly!

    i understand how it could be frustrating to someone to not be able to understand me because i change a lot though. sometimes it's hard for me to understand me because i change a lot. lol.

  4. #14
    Reptilian Snuggletron's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Arclight View Post
    You can never be anyone else but yourself. No matter how you behave.. It's you.. who else is it going to be?

    On that note.. no one behaves with 100% consistency. Moods ,situations and the people present at any given time will alter your behavior.

    When I am with a girlfriend is not how I am going to behave when I am with my mother or at work.

    No matter.. Each behavior is still me,despite how different they might appear to an observer.
    Yeah, I believe this too. People are chameleons...there are advantages to this. It's not always insecurity.

  5. #15
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    what about it doesn't compute? doesn't everyone adapt to situations somewhat? one is quieter in a nice restaurant; louder outside playing tag. spontaneous on vacation; focused during test-taking. to me it seems very natural
    No, you are mixing things. If I go to a restaurant the reasons for me being quieter is not the same as being more outgoing when surrounded by a sports crowd. One is confirming to good etiquette, not to bother other people. Another is trying to please other people.

    Some of those statements sounded contradictory so that's why I replied with "does not compute". They also sounded very un-Fi.

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Moiety View Post
    No, you are mixing things. If I go to a restaurant the reasons for me being quieter is not the same as being more outgoing when surrounded by a sports crowd. One is confirming to good etiquette, not to bother other people. Another is trying to please other people.

    Some of those statements sounded contradictory so that's why I replied with "does not compute". They also sounded very un-Fi.
    I don't see how what you are saying is any different.. Whatever the motivation is, it's irrelevant .. You adapt to each situation. Whether it be in the name of etiquette or personal values., it still amounts to the same thing, your behavior changes.

    This does not mean the core does not remain intact.

    It would also be nice if maybe, you refrained from telling people what their functions should look like?

  7. #17
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Arclight View Post
    I don't see how what you are saying is any different.. Whatever the motivation is, it's irrelevant .. You adapt to each situation. Whether it be in the name of etiquette or personal values., it still amounts to the same thing, your behavior changes.
    To me motivation and intent means the world, as I'm sure it does to other ENFPs. You're a Fe user so it's probably more foreign to you.

    It would also be nice if maybe, you refrained from telling people what their functions should look like?
    Why are you buttin in trying to make my comments ad hominem when they weren't?

  8. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Moiety View Post
    To me motivation and intent means the world, as I'm sure it does to other ENFPs. You're a Fe user so it's probably more foreign to you.

    It would also be nice if maybe, you refrained from telling people what their functions should look like?
    Why are you buttin in trying to make my comments ad hominem when they weren't?
    My protective nature??

    And motivation and intent mean the world to me too.. But don't you see how they are the cause of adaption not the counter to it.

    You are saying the exact same thing she is.. and getting fussed over semantics.. and telling her she doesn't sound very Fi

    That's why I am butting in

  9. #19
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Arclight View Post
    My protective nature??

    And motivation and intent mean the world to me too.. But don't you see how they are the cause of adaption not the counter to it.

    You are saying the exact same thing she is.. and getting fussed over semantics.. and telling her she doesn't sound very Fi

    That's why I am butting in
    No, I don't. Because as any Fi user will tell you preserving our identity irrespective of the crowd is very important sometimes. My intent and motivations have prevented me from adapting to the crowd numerous crowds.

  10. #20
    Senior Member Sparrow's Avatar
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    There is a time and place for everything, just because someone acts a different way around different groups of people doesnt mean they arent themselves .

    Examples:

    If you cuss like a sailor, you would do that at the bar with your friends, but you wouldnt do that at your nephews birthday party, or at church service (if you go to church).

    If you have friends who dont like punk rock or hardcore music, you wouldn't talk about it all night just because you like it....what would be the point in doing that when they arent interested it whatsoever.

    If you like to get wasted and do drugs, you wouldnt get wasted and do drugs at your annual work cruise, lol.
    Fe | Ni | Se | Ti ... 3w4 ... Lawful Neutral ... Johari -Nohari

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