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  1. #41
    Striving for balance Little Linguist's Avatar
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    Look at this thread. Who got irritated? The INXXs, especially the INXPs. They think things out FIRST. So they assume you brought this thread to the table completely well constructed, giving your best shot. And they ripped it to shreds, calling it crap. You wanted to start a discussion about something to mold it in the process. This is the best example of where IN meets EN and just goes WTF??????

  2. #42
    Senior Member Jaguar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThatsWhatHeSaid View Post
    An addict has certain needs. Is there a no wrong way to treat an addict? This isn't a debate about moral objectivity; it's about the understanding that certain medicines help relieve symptoms and certain medicines exacerbate them or just don't treat them at all.








  3. #43
    Retired Member Wonkavision's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nolla View Post
    Well, I'm just wondering. Partly, because your type is so close to mine, but your behavior in this case doesn't make sense to me. If you just want to express something and don't need anyone to express it to, then you could just as well beat that punch bag. If you need to express it to one or several individuals, then you are trying to influence them in some way. Right? Communicating is to influence and to be influenced. Even if we are talking about weather.

    I do want to discuss it with others. Otherwise I'd write a blog.

    Bouncing my ideas off of others helps me to flesh them out.

    It might be hard for an Introvert to understand the necessity of doing that, but it's typical for Extraverts to do it.


    My primary motive for posting threads here is to flesh out my ideas.

    Unfortunately, I don't do it often because there seems to be some unwritten rules about how to do it properly that I'm simply not understanding, or in some cases, refuse to submit to.

    Which sucks, because I'm a very curious person who loves to engage others.

    Hopefully, some day I will learn to navigate all the unwritten rules of etiquette on this forum without abandoning myself in the process.
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  4. #44
    Senor Membrane
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wonkavision View Post
    I do want to discuss it with others. Otherwise I'd write a blog.

    Bouncing my ideas off of others helps me to flesh them out.

    It might be hard for an Introvert to understand the necessity of doing that, but it's typical for Extraverts to do it.
    Ok, so you are here to be influenced. You want others to help you in building your understanding.

    Quote Originally Posted by Wonkavision View Post
    Unfortunately, I don't do it often because there seems to be some unwritten rules about how to do it properly that I'm simply not understanding, or in some cases, refuse to submit to.

    Which sucks, because I'm a very curious person who loves to engage others.

    Hopefully, some day I will learn to navigate all the unwritten rules of etiquette on this forum without abandoning myself in the process.
    In this thread (I don't want to talk about the others you've started lately, because I have really not paid attention to them that much) the problem wasn't that you didn't obey some unwritten rules, but that you were being defensive and aggressive. If your point is to bounce off ideas and come to a conclusion through that way, in other words to be influenced, you can't be overly defensive at the same time.

  5. #45
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Are we talking about venting here? Because I'm fine with venting. I'm less fine when someone is venting about me, TO me, because I can't detach from that situation and not take it personally. But yeah, if an ENFP friend needs to vent to me, I'm not going to tell them to calm down or just breathe or some such patronizing bs. I wouldn't necessarily want someone to vent to me multiple times a day or something, because that would drain me.
    Something Witty

  6. #46
    Striving for balance Little Linguist's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wonkavision View Post
    I do want to discuss it with others. Otherwise I'd write a blog.

    Bouncing my ideas off of others helps me to flesh them out.

    It might be hard for an Introvert to understand the necessity of doing that, but it's typical for Extraverts to do it.


    My primary motive for posting threads here is to flesh out my ideas.

    Unfortunately, I don't do it often because there seems to be some unwritten rules about how to do it properly that I'm simply not understanding, or in some cases, refuse to submit to.

    Which sucks, because I'm a very curious person who loves to engage others.

    Hopefully, some day I will learn to navigate all the unwritten rules of etiquette on this forum without abandoning myself in the process.
    Please explain what you mean in more depth. I'm grossly unaware of what has transpired recently to make you say this, so it is hard for me to make connections when I do not know the context.

    Maybe if you could be a bit more specific....

  7. #47
    Retired Member Wonkavision's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Linguist View Post

    Look at this thread. Who got irritated? The INXXs, especially the INXPs. They think things out FIRST. So they assume you brought this thread to the table completely well constructed, giving your best shot. And they ripped it to shreds, calling it crap. You wanted to start a discussion about something to mold it in the process.
    Yeah, that's what really surprises me, and always has, since I've been on this forum.

    At first, I assumed that the purpose of posting a thread was to get a discussion going.

    I didn't realize that you were supposed to labor over your OP to create irrefutable positions, or to go the other extreme and to be so objective about everything that no one could possibly get mad at you.

    I've tried to conform somewhat to the expectations of people on this forum but the expectations are like shifting sand, so it doesn't work.

    What else can I do but just post the way I think is right?
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    TAKE CARE.

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  8. #48
    Retired Member Wonkavision's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nolla View Post
    Ok, so you are here to be influenced. You want others to help you in building your understanding.
    I think that's a strange way to put it, but yeah--bouncing my ideas off of others helps me to flesh out my ideas.

    This is common with Extraverts.
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    I'M OUTTA HERE.

    IT'S BEEN FUN.

    TAKE CARE.

    PEACE OUT!!!


  9. #49
    Striving for balance Little Linguist's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    Are we talking about venting here? Because I'm fine with venting. I'm less fine when someone is venting about me, TO me, because I can't detach from that situation and not take it personally. But yeah, if an ENFP friend needs to vent to me, I'm not going to tell them to calm down or just breathe or some such patronizing bs. I wouldn't necessarily want someone to vent to me multiple times a day or something, because that would drain me.
    You know what I find hard (not as an ENFP, really, but just as Renée)? I find it really hard to know when to differentiate between the following:

    a. venting just to vent
    b. venting at me to piss me off
    c. venting at me to clarify/correct a situation
    d. venting to get an answer
    e. venting about someone else when you're really venting about us/something to do with us vicariously and I'm supposed to somehow pick that out from high heaven
    f. venting about one thing when you're really pissed off about something else
    g. venting about general things when you really mean something specific
    h. venting about specific things when you really mean something general

    Etc. etc. very hard for me to distinguish. I think it's related to the topic. Any ideas how to hone that skill better?

  10. #50
    Striving for balance Little Linguist's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wonkavision View Post
    Yeah, that's what really surprises me, and always has, since I've been on this forum.

    At first, I assumed that the purpose of posting a thread was to get a discussion going.

    I didn't realize that you were supposed to labor over your OP to create irrefutable positions, or to go the other extreme and to be so objective about everything that no one could possibly get mad at you.

    I've tried to conform somewhat to the expectations of people on this forum but the expectations are like shifting sand, so it doesn't work.

    What else can I do but just post the way I think is right?
    I have noticed in general that INTPs especially will rip you a new one if they see your OP is not consistent/doesn't make sense and isn't well thought out. The problem is that they (sometimes) dismiss good ideas just because the logic was fuzzy/non-existent/not thought through. But mature INTPs will look at it despite the logical consistency or at least give you the chance to defend/revamp your argument, as most people here did in the thread.

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