There are a lot of things that are important to do, even if we do not feel like it. There are a lot of times when people don't feel love for their spouse at that moment, yet they choose not to treat them with disrespect. They may feel frustrated with their child, but they don't unleash a verbal tirade that will create lasting damage. They may prefer to go to bed or do something for themselves, but realize that tonight is when their teenager is in a mood to visit. They may find it difficult to go to the hospital to see someone they love, but they also realize that it is worse to force their loved one to face death alone. When an alarm clock goes off, people don't always feel like getting up, but they do. We eat well and exercise sometimes even when we'd prefer to do what is easiest. We clean our houses to prevent them from becoming dangerous, unpleasant to be in or losing value, even though cleaning is not most people's first compulsion. Life is made up of a series of tasks which may be unpleasant in the moment, but ultimate create resilience in us, better character, and a more ordered and happy existence.
I understand that Fi-ers may pick up on the fact that what we are doing, while being socially acceptable, is not where our heart lies. While I can see where it could hurt to come to that realization if it is you that is being tolerated, it doesn't mean that our desire is not to do everything within our locus of control to make the other person feel valued. Given the same circumstances, that is what we would hope for for ourselves.