User Tag List

First 444525354555664 Last

Results 531 to 540 of 938

  1. #531
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    Enfp
    Enneagram
    497 sx/so
    Socionics
    IEE Fi
    Posts
    14,658

    Default

    I don't think PB is taking it personally

    Funny...maybe other Fi-users aren't going to agree with this, but...

    Fidelia is talking about how she's at the top of her what she can maintain, relationship-wise. I instantly went...'Why does that matter?'

    I guess in a way, to me, Fi is about intimately connecting in the moment. Kinda like a one-night stand with a guy you really like and trust. Just..in the moment. It's intimate, intense, and soothing..but there are no other expectations after that night. There has to be trust as there's a great deal of vulnerability that comes into play. There's just that special moment you share. And perhaps, if things went really good and you both like the idea of it, you could make it a more regular thing. And from there on, it could turn into the full blown thing. But that expectation isn't there from the beginning. And neither is the expectation of maintenance. It's just sharing a really intense experience and gaining a new way of looking at things..It's enriching to both parties, but not binding in any way.
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  2. #532
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    1w2 so/sx
    Posts
    11,133

    Default

    Wow Tallulah's post before last was pretty much all sentiments that I share. I really think what I find most upsetting is the inaccuracy. I am my ideas mostly. They are a big part of me. Therefore if you misunderstand them completely, it's going to make me feel like you really don't understand me, which makes it difficult for us to connect. That's true even about factual stuff.

    For example, someone wrote up a little blurb once to introduce me to a group of people. They were a person whose heart I had no question about and whom I truly valued. After they introduced me in print(with about four errors), I let them know about 1 or 2 although I didn't want to hurt their feelings. I just thought if I were them I'd want to know, particularly if we are friends. They just laughed it off and didn't change them. I didn't want to make an issue of it, so I didn't, but I still wish I could change it, rather than having people still be misinformed.

    Oh and skylights, that was a great post. Lots of stuff to go back over and answer. I will do it sometime today, but am teaching for the evening. I don't want to lose any of those thoughts though! In answer to the one thing - no, it's not that I think I'm deep and complex or that others can't handle me. I just think that Fe honesty and Fi honesty are different. I don't want to go around hurting someone with my Fe honesty, yet I am unlikely to feel truly close to someone unless I can be 100% me, even at my most unvarnished, frustrated or harsh. I don't exercise that on people close to me often, but of the maybe 4 people or so I've ever done that with, getting through that successfully is what allowed them into the very most inner chambers of my heart.

  3. #533
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    1w2 so/sx
    Posts
    11,133

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Satine View Post
    I don't think PB is taking it personally

    Funny...maybe other Fi-users aren't going to agree with this, but...

    Fidelia is talking about how she's at the top of her what she can maintain, relationship-wise. I instantly went...'Why does that matter?'

    I guess in a way, to me, Fi is about intimately connecting in the moment. Kinda like a one-night stand with a guy you really like and trust. Just..in the moment. It's intimate, intense, and soothing..but there are no other expectations after that night. There has to be trust as there's a great deal of vulnerability that comes into play. There's just that special moment you share. And perhaps, if things went really good and you both like the idea of it, you could make it a more regular thing. And from there on, it could turn into the full blown thing. But that expectation isn't there from the beginning. And neither is the expectation of maintenance. It's just sharing a really intense experience and gaining a new way of looking at things..It's enriching to both parties, but not binding in any way.


    Really? I don't have any relationships in my life like this. In fact, it doesn't even sound appealing to me. I've had people that I've enjoyed hanging out with intensely for a short time, knowing that they aren't going to be lifelong friends, but I wouldn't share much of myself with them in that way.

    Good to know...

  4. #534
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    937 so/sx
    Posts
    6,226

    Default

    Satine has it; no it's not personal, and yes, it is about this moment.

    Although, I will pull a classic INFP here and wonder if I've done anything to have precipitated this decision to not go further. I could hardly call myself an INFP if I didn't self-analyze to see if I did something here or in the past to have found myself in this position.

    And, I wouldn't really classify this as a "one-night stand" but I would say, that - in this thread, on this topic, I would go farther; so in that sense, the metaphor works. I too look for longevity and depth in relationships, but on certain topical issues, would go deep and have no expectation beyond that.
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

  5. #535
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    Enfp
    Enneagram
    497 sx/so
    Socionics
    IEE Fi
    Posts
    14,658

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post


    Really? I don't have any relationships in my life like this. In fact, it doesn't even sound appealing to me. I've had people that I've enjoyed hanging out with intensely for a short time, knowing that they aren't going to be lifelong friends, but I wouldn't share much of myself with them in that way.

    Good to know...
    Don't get me wrong, I don't wanna go back to being strangers the next day. I'd still acknowledge your presence and smile and even treasure that special feeling you invoke in me coz we *did* share something. Something worthwile. There is respect and trust...and i will be there for you if you need help, but it's not like I wanna move in with you or make you an integral part of my life...

    And in that way it's very much like fuckbuddies, or one night stands, I'd say.

    And I'll share that part of me coz it makes me feel good and hopefully does the same for you. To take away, if only temporarily, the pain, sadness, loneliness, and god knows what other negative emotiosn we're bombarded with daily, and go exploring some good emotions

    I might give you a tiny piece of my heart..a silly little secret about me, to show my trust, and to teach you something, either about me or about the world and *hope* you'll do the same for me, so I can see who you are..understand you better and the way you view the world.

    Consider it a time spent in a fantasy world. You know you have to go back to reality at some point, but right at that point, there's nothing in this world but you and me and the world we create together

    Consider it a dream...you have to wake up eventually, yes...but you might as well enjoy it while it lasts
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  6. #536
    Senior Member Tiltyred's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    468 sx/sp
    Socionics
    EII None
    Posts
    4,383

    Default

    The more we talk, the more Fi seems bizarre to me.

  7. #537
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    1w2 so/sx
    Posts
    11,133

    Default

    Sorry, it's just not how I roll. Even the thought of it makes me feel twitchy.

    If I share information for any other reason than being close to the person, it is merely to put the other person at ease or to see if there is potential for moving the relationship closer through mutual sharing.

  8. #538
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Enneagram
    4 so/sp
    Posts
    6,931

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Satine
    I guess in a way, to me, Fi is about intimately connecting in the moment. Kinda like a one-night stand with a guy you really like and trust. Just..in the moment. It's intimate, intense, and soothing..but there are no other expectations after that night. There has to be trust as there's a great deal of vulnerability that comes into play. There's just that special moment you share. And perhaps, if things went really good and you both like the idea of it, you could make it a more regular thing. And from there on, it could turn into the full blown thing. But that expectation isn't there from the beginning. And neither is the expectation of maintenance. It's just sharing a really intense experience and gaining a new way of looking at things..It's enriching to both parties, but not binding in any way.
    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post


    Really? I don't have any relationships in my life like this. In fact, it doesn't even sound appealing to me. I've had people that I've enjoyed hanging out with intensely for a short time, knowing that they aren't going to be lifelong friends, but I wouldn't share much of myself with them in that way.

    Good to know...
    haha.. yeah, I reacted similarly.

    I think this is where my pragmatism in relationships comes out.... I'll be frank, I tend not to see the *point* of an in-the-moment intensity/sharing thing. And I'm not that interested. For me, I'm about building, maintaining, and investing in longterm relationships - relationships that I believe can last. Also, for me to want to share deeply with someone and be really open/vulnerable, or whatever, it means I'm already to a point where I want them in my life for the long run - I share *because* I value the relationship and am already emotionally or relationally involved with them, and therefore want to get closer, and hope for that to continue and intend on my end to invest in it. I am sort of an all or nothing person when it comes to relationships. And to be frank again, I *would* have expectations that things would continue on afterwards. Perhaps this is why I would be/ am quite distrustful of the more typically 'P' approach of.. ok, let's just enjoy the moment and maybe things will continue or maybe on the other hand it'll just be an intense-moment-thing and that's that.....

    Basically I don't approach relationships/connections in any way remotely resembling what Satine describes.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

    My Photography and Watercolor Fine Art Prints!!! Cascade Colors Fine Art Prints
    https://docs.google.com/uc?export=do...Gd5N3NZZE52QjQ

  9. #539
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    Enfp
    Enneagram
    497 sx/so
    Socionics
    IEE Fi
    Posts
    14,658

    Default

    *smiles*

    It is why I don't have a problem hugging someone I do not know when I notice they're in intense pain and they need a hug..and nobody is there for them. I'll just jump past all those social niceties and steps, to get to the point...take away their pain. And I might share something with them at that point I've never told anyone before, becoz it's what will make us connect and ultimately, hopefully, will be helpful to them in that moment.

    I won't see them again after that, most likely as we are total strangers. But at least, at that point, at that time, I'm able to take away their pain and agony..and hopefully offer them something that will help them through that difficult time (especially if they have no one in their lives to turn to for this).


    And PB, correct me if I'm wrong, but the reason why PB offered Fidelia this 'journey' is becoz she knows Fidelia has been looking for answers, looking to understand for a *long* time. She's just trying to help you, using this method
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  10. #540
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    937 so/sx
    Posts
    6,226

    Default

    ^ maybe some of this is enneagram-related too; I wouldn't take Satine's metaphor to the extreme for myself. As an sx, Satine is primed to make those intense connections even more so.
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

Similar Threads

  1. When Fe meets Fi......
    By RedAmazoneFriendZone in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 45
    Last Post: 05-15-2016, 08:09 AM
  2. Fe vs. Fi, Disloyalty, Allegiance, Or the Lack Thereof…
    By Esoteric Wench in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 59
    Last Post: 01-13-2011, 07:55 PM
  3. [NT] Fe and Fi, the NT version
    By BlahBlahNounBlah in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 73
    Last Post: 04-20-2010, 09:55 AM
  4. Let's end the Fe/Ti - Fi/Te wars once and for all...
    By onemoretime in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 35
    Last Post: 03-16-2010, 12:00 PM
  5. Why does Ti always go with Fe and Fi with Te?
    By sofmarhof in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 73
    Last Post: 02-23-2010, 03:57 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO