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  1. #1
    Senior Member chippinchunk's Avatar
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    Default Following the crowd, or leading it? -not an NF thing?-

    In my small group of friends, I have been said to be the leader. At least, this is what my INTP friend told me. And because of this I had some strange realization, that i'm always the one to be leading not only my friends but everything. (i.e. where my family goes, what we're going to eat, what we should do...etc.) I'm always the one making the decision, like everyone else is indecisive.(Wait is that even leading???) It only seems right for me to step into that type of spot since everyone else doesnt care, or doesnt know what to do.

    And then when it comes to following the crowd, I completely turn away. It's like I dont care. If someones playing "follow the leader" I back away, or just dont care to participate. It's not like I have a problem with team work, I actually cant even do that - my I takes the best of me- but otherwise, I help and do what I can, but I notice when I'm not the person leading it, my interest is kind of just drifting.

    This also surprised me because im such a easy-going, dont-really-care, whatever type of person. I dont mind following, it just ---Ok, it really sucks. but I can deal with it...

    Do you tend to lead the crowd or are you just a drifter, kind of going with the flow?

  2. #2
    heart on fire
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    I don't want to lead, follow or drift. I want to go where I am moved to go when I am moved to. I want to be self directed as much as possible.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Priam's Avatar
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    Default

    I think that might have more to do with the J/P dynamic, rather than N or F. The drive to impose some form of order can be what makes someone step into a leadership role vs. letting the issue drift in some free-form state.
    "The subject chooses to sit in shadow and search for wisdom by reflecting upon his trial. The problem is not that he is cold and wet, but that cold and wet seems problematic, so he embraces those hardships in order to best them."

  4. #4
    Senior Member alcea rosea's Avatar
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    It depends on the group and the people in there. If there is no strong willed leader in the group, I don't mind leading. My leading involves always democracy. If I follow I follow if I see any sense in the whole thing. If there is no sense or idea I can refuse to follow. So I alter my behavior according to situation in hand and how I see it.

  5. #5
    Wild Card Atomic Fiend's Avatar
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    I try to go my own way, if people follow then whatever, but I rarely end up following someone else.

  6. #6
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    I tend to follow if there is already a preset hierarchy to the specific group, and if there is movement towards the goal. I tend to get quickly annoyed with stagnation, to the point that I will step up and lead if we're just sitting around gathering dust. I guess I tend to not make waves unless the boat isn't moving.

  7. #7
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    I seem okay in both roles, but people seem to put me up as a leader a lot. It's like they trust me. If I feel that someone's asking to do something I don't believe in, I'll resist, but otherwise I'll probably go along with them. I find group work stressful, but I can do it if I need to.

    But honestly, I don't usually participate with crowds often. I do most things alone...

  8. #8
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    I don't really follow blindly actually my choice is to do my own thing but if it's in a group setting I'll do the job I'm given, I just don't like telling people what to do, though I am good at arranging schedules just don't expect me to follow them. So really when it comes to scheduling I should arrange the schedule and someone else should put it into action.

    in a more casual setting I'm a drifter, my mom even commented on when I was a baby how I was content about everything and just went with the flow. People have always been scared that I could be walked on because of my laid back nature, even my grandma voiced her concern when I was about 7. People sometimes think its to avoid conflict but if it really bothers me I will say something, otherwise it doesn't really matter to me.
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  9. #9
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    I tend to be the brains behind the throne... kind of strange...
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  10. #10
    Resident Snot-Nose GZA's Avatar
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    I often take leadership roles. Is it because of NF or J, or P, or even I or E? I don't think so. I'm INFP, which generally doesn't strike me as a natural leader kind of personality. I don't like being told to take leadership roles, but sometimes I naturally fall into them. I guess sometimes there is something where i have an idea of what i want, a vision even, or a creative instict and I just NEED to make it happen, so I start directing people to do their part. I've had people tell me they'd never want to play with me as a musician because I would be too controlling, which is absolutely true and its happened.

    I like to encourage people to use their own ideas and I like to encourage their skills and talent and efforts. I like to exncourage people to do things in a way that feels natural to them, but at the same time, I sometimes make precise directions if i have an exact idea, and I apologize for it

    I don't think leadership is always related to type. I mean, yah, some types will naturally take leadership roles based on their type (ENTJ for example), but I see no reason why other types can't also lead in the propor given situation. A lot of leadership comes from charisma and confidence and how you treat people, and any type can have the right combination of those things.

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