[ENFP] What do ENFPs think of INFPs?

[skylights]

in general i INFPs. they're cute and understanding.

Sometimes I get tired of trying to get something out of a quiet person but once you get to know them they open up like anyone else. Unfortunately for me, an enfp, my attention span is short and by the time their ready I'm bored.

Your post saddens me. Because the quietness that you don't like is Fi. Which is also a part of your own self. Either way, sooner or later, you will appreciate your friends more. And it will come from within your own self-discovery and sense of Fi. Not from your demands on them. I guarantee. There's no way an ENFP can stay on the outside forever. You can run, but you can't hide!

what? i'm not running from Fi and i feel like this. sometimes INFPs just take too long. it's true with a lot of introverts. i would love to hang around with you and talk, but waiting for you to feel okay about talking is really hard because i'm being distracted by 10000 other things that are interesting too. it's more about Ne than Fi.

i also am beginning to notice the "teacher voice" that Fe users have pointed out in the Fe/Fi thread here. heads up to all NPs, the kind of speech pattern here - we feel like we're explaining things we know, because they're inside us, but it can come off as kind of self-absorbed and pretentious. this one kinda felt annoying to me because i felt like it was trying to say, no, you're wrong, because you haven't gotten all the way to your inner self yet because you're not a Fi dom. if you were better, like me, you would understand and accept my quietness. i don't think that tone of voice was intended but that's how it reads.

edit: wait, was i using the teacher voice here? the irony

 

[Xellotath]

I like INFPs, although apparently its more common for ENFPs to dislike them (so I hear).

What does sadden me is that their tertiary is our inferior and vice versa. So while there's tons in common, I imagine that its not easy to help each other mutually develop. Maybe that's where the antagonism is coming from?

 

[Vamp]

what? i'm not running from Fi and i feel like this. sometimes INFPs just take too long. it's true with a lot of introverts. i would love to hang around with you and talk, but waiting for you to feel okay about talking is really hard because i'm being distracted by 10000 other things that are interesting too. it's more about Ne than Fi.

i also am beginning to notice the "teacher voice" that Fe users have pointed out in the Fe/Fi thread here. heads up to all NFPs, the kind of speech pattern here - we feel like we're explaining things we know, because they're inside us, but it can come off as kind of self-absorbed and pretentious. this one kinda felt annoying to me because i felt like it was trying to say, no, you're wrong, because you haven't gotten all the way to your inner self yet because you're not a Fi dom. if you were better, like me, you would understand and accept my quietness. i don't think that tone of voice was intended but that's how it reads.

edit: wait, was i using the teacher voice here? the irony

It actually did read/sound that way. I just choose to let it lone. I still say I don't have time to wait and wait and wait, my life has been nothing but waiting and I'm just kinda done with the whole concept. I usually give up on the major introverts, no matter how Fi the silence might be- my Fi works differently and to my Fi that kind of guarded silence comes off as secretive and I strive for honesty in all my friends.

 

[Moiety]

I like INFPs, although apparently its more common for ENFPs to dislike them (so I hear).

What does sadden me is that their tertiary is our inferior and vice versa. So while there's tons in common, I imagine that its not easy to help each other mutually develop. Maybe that's where the antagonism is coming from?

Quite possibly. If an ENFP gets mad at an INFP he will probably use tertiary Te because he is stressed. The INFP leads with Fi, so Te is her inferior...so she will probably react very bad...stressing herself and using tertiary Si....which will cut the ENFP deep too being his inferior.

Or something like that

 

[You]

They're sexy emos.

 

[Chunes]

On the flip side, it does drain me that they often see the world in such negative gloom and although I do enjoy watching it at first, the Fi-Si loop is very much draining on my positive nature, after a while. INxPs that are stuck in their cynical world view coz they're too obstinate to want to build a bridge between their pristine ideal fantasy world and reality, are hard to endure, as that feeling of wallowing and melancholy, as well as fatalism is incredibly depressing. Still...I consider it a challenge to put a smile on their face at that point

There is absolutely nothing worse in this world than an ENFP who feels challenged to make me smile.

The other thing that sometimes annoys me is the elitism. I get it, it's a defense mechanism and a result of refining your tastes and identity, but it excludes others and makes you judgemental, imo, and since that's one of my personal Fi values...I kinda get annoyed at that

The selectivism is used to prevent situations like the above from happening.

To me it usually feels inherently belittling to be in the presence of some kind of over-positive jazzed-up ENFP. It's like they can't even see the evils in the world and it's as though they write them off and all the pain they cause others.

 

[You]

There is absolutely nothing worse in this world than an ENFP who feels challenged to make me smile.

You have a Pokemon avatar. Smiling shouldn't be a problem.

 

[Amargith]

You need a better defense mechanism as that one suck ***







My INFP usually gives me a faint little smile, but soon gets overtaken again by the cynicism, if it's eating away at him too much. We've been friends for several years and he refers to me as one of his oldest friends with a vibe of intense nostalgia and care, which I appreciate greatly and reciprocate. Still, hearing him get stuck in that Fi-Si loop and knowing what it feels like makes me wanna save him from getting stuck there though I usually instinctively know when I can and when I just have to let him work it out for himself. Hearing him rant and rave about the wrongs in this world, while not doing a thing about it, is taxing too, as he'll never be happy this way...and that's his own doing. As I am his friend, I wish I could make him happy...and I try, if only for a moment

 

[You]

Huh?

 

[Chunes]

Hearing him rant and rave about the wrongs in this world, while not doing a thing about it, is taxing too, as he'll never be happy this way...and that's his own doing.

The things we rant about are usually beyond the ability of one person to change. Yeah, a person can change his own situation, but that doesn't mean the problem is gone. Furthermore, 'doing something about it' isn't the best advice for an INFP, because we are more likely to regret something we did than something we didn't. Jarring change causes too much discomfort and after-the-fact moral analysis.

You do have a point, though. I just think the solution isn't what I think you think it is.

 

[nolla]

The things we rant about are usually beyond the ability of one person to change. Yeah, a person can change his own situation, but that doesn't mean the problem is gone. Furthermore, 'doing something about it' isn't the best advice for an INFP, because we are more likely to regret something we did than something we didn't. Jarring change causes too much discomfort and after-the-fact moral analysis.

You do have a point, though. I just think the solution isn't what you think it is.

Yeah... but it'll go smoother when the forces of the world crush his spirit...

(<--- here is the blank stare of a crushed spirit)

 

[Chunes]

I recently grew an optimistic streak in that strange INFP way. I'm out dancing with the flames. Maybe I can at least carve my own niche out of this stage they call a world. Maybe I'll become jaded again after the world crushes my spirit.. again.

Damn, I'm getting depressed.

 

[nolla]

Yep, I got my own way there too... I got to the point of seeing it so absurd that the comedy overrides everything. I mean, it's hilarious, all those big people with their "power" and none of them actually controls anything, everything just floating on and all those abstractions about saving the planet while at the same time fighting the nature with concrete and powerlines, and spilling the mexican gulf full of oil. The dwarves were too greedy and dig too deep. Hearing about the peace process in middle east. I heard about it twenty years ago and they still call it a process? What the hell... It is all absurd. I feel like I've gone the full circle and become on the opposite end of the spectrum.

 

[You]

You say "Hello", I say "Goodbye"

 

[Chunes]

For me it's all about how people expect me to spend my time. I'm supposed to be a slave who houses and feeds himself and is told that there are such things as 'dream' jobs.. as if my dream should ever be a job. Getting money. Heh. It's the only thing in existence that is impossible to do without sacrificing some irreplaceable part of your soul. In my world, we lock up people who start jabbering about money in the loony bin. I can barely cope with this world I'm stuck in now.

 

[nolla]

Tell me about it! That is basically the area of life the propaganda is the most effective and visible. It's of course only natural, since we are talking about a big thing here. You sell half of your life for something, so it would be better if it wasn't all pain in there. But, yep, it isn't easy trying to find that niche. I have trouble when I perceive I am not respected for anything else than the value in cash I can make the company. From my point of view the company is there so the people in the company can eat. Not the other way around.

 

[Chunes]

Exactly.. when was the point in history when money ceased being the means to the end of exchange and exchange became the means to accruing money? Why do so many people have to be stuck doing monotonous, life-draining tasks instead of the things their hearts urge them to do?

*sigh*.. Earth.. the only planet in the universe with the saying "Money doesn't grow on trees!" ........... when the things Earthlings need actually do.

 

[nolla]

Exactly.. when was the point in history when money ceased being the means to the end of exchange and exchange became the means to accruing money?

Well, that would be when they invented that you don't need to have as much gold in the bank than the amount of money you have printed, since the people wont be all coming at the same time.

*sigh*.. Earth.. the only planet in the universe with the saying "Money doesn't grow on trees!" ........... when the things Earthlings need actually do.

Ha! Yeah...

 

[Amargith]

The things we rant about are usually beyond the ability of one person to change. Yeah, a person can change his own situation, but that doesn't mean the problem is gone. Furthermore, 'doing something about it' isn't the best advice for an INFP, because we are more likely to regret something we did than something we didn't. Jarring change causes too much discomfort and after-the-fact moral analysis.

You do have a point, though. I just think the solution isn't what I think you think it is.

I know it's beyond his reach to change. That's why I wished he would use his Ne to think of ways to integrate his world with reality...to actually use that world of his to bring a bit of sunshine to this harsh reality..instead of adding more depression to it. Coz I've seen it and it's gorgeous. For that matter, I've been there, done that, and it sucks. It's hard to build that bridge, but very much worthwhile

 

[alcea rosea]

I'll turn it around. I think I'm too much for the most INFP's I meet. They say I'm too energetic, too "space conquering" and too talkative.

But when they'll get to their Ne mode and to Ne talk, it's like seeing your own thoughts, like talking to your kind. It's very cool. I do like INFP's way of being, because it's very familiar. I mean the independence of the thought, the openness for possibilities and things that most (some) people are "afraid" of. I think there should be 1-2 INFP's in everybody's life. At least every ENFP's life, so there would be somebody who understands, and the understanding is to both ways.