tortoise
New member
- Joined
- Aug 25, 2010
- Messages
- 161
- MBTI Type
- ENFP
I think the basic ENFP dilemma and cause of stress is this. We are driven to interact with people -- always fascinated by people and want to get to know them deeper ... BUT ... we have an inner life that only a handful of people 'get'. We've learnt (probably from childhood) that if we express everything we think and feel, we'll be rejected for being way too weird, intense or out-there so we learn to guard our innermost thoughts and feelings. We want to share and connect at that deep level -- it's a very fundamental need -- but we keep the lid on it because we know that most people can't handle our intensity and the almost psychic insights we come up with.
So, we have hundreds of surface level friends who think we're charming, happy , fun and loving, but we feel lonely because there are so few people (if any) who *really* get us.
We are good at making others feel good, but it's hard for others to make us feel good because only that very deep connection is enough to make us feel good and less alone.
So, we have hundreds of surface level friends who think we're charming, happy , fun and loving, but we feel lonely because there are so few people (if any) who *really* get us.
We are good at making others feel good, but it's hard for others to make us feel good because only that very deep connection is enough to make us feel good and less alone.