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  1. #11
    Senior Member KDude's Avatar
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    I rarely tell anyone to put their act together. Unless it's on the highway. Maybe I have a bad case of road rage or it's an ugly shadow Te, but quite often I'm thinking to myself that people need to get their act together, in so many words. Maybe this is normal.. Lately, I've been extra freaked by driving.

    I'm more hypocritical in a Fi-Fe sense.. I like to consider myself cooperative, but I struggle between wanting to cooperate with conventional standards and following my own.

    edit: Of course, if something's bad, I'm going to fight about it. I guess if you call that "telling people to put their act together", then yes, I do. I don't consider myself a hypocrite for that though.

    I just don't generally get into a supervisory mode and start telling people to get their act together or to suck it up. Most of the time, I'd probably tell the person who's telling someone else to suck it up that they need to chill out and look at how someone is suffering. Not a big fan of tough love.

  2. #12
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    Originally posted by flameskull95
    If you're implying I'm an ESTJ/ISTJ, I can't be, I've gone over that option and I actually started off mbti thinking I was ISTJ, then INFJ then I looked at functions and found out that I was actually INFP, except my Te is stronger, like an INTPs.... so that's where that 'suck it up' stuff probably comes from, was just wondering if it was an INFP thing also.
    I wasn't implying that you were ESTJ or ISTJ, I just meant that in general INFP's don't typically say things like that, but they can sometimes. I mean I would be lying if I asserted that I never say those things to people sometimes (actually perhaps you were right on the hypocrite thing). I apologize if I offended you in any way.

  3. #13
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    It happens, it's frustrating, then again some things I end up learning too. The refining of anything is never pretty and employs as much destruction as it does construction.
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  4. #14
    Senior Member tkae.'s Avatar
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    Never.

    If anything, I'm likely to over-coddle people.

    I am hypocritical and selfish though. I always talk about everyone getting along and letting go of negative feelings, but I'm horrible about holding grudges and actively hating people for various reasons (resentment for being mean to me, etc).

    But in the situation you've described? No. Never.

  5. #15
    Senior Member flameskull95's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Savage Brain View Post
    I wasn't implying that you were ESTJ or ISTJ, I just meant that in general INFP's don't typically say things like that, but they can sometimes. I mean I would be lying if I asserted that I never say those things to people sometimes (actually perhaps you were right on the hypocrite thing). I apologize if I offended you in any way.
    I wasn't offended.... just the facts. lol.
    I'm a INFP - The sociopath

    I think I'm either a 4w5, 4w3, 6w5 or 9w1. Most possibly 4w5.

    Feeling FiNe

  6. #16
    Senior Member rowingineden's Avatar
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    Uh, no, I'm pretty much the opposite of that. Which is not actually fortunate for me, because I tend to be the only one. So other people end up taking advantage of me a lot.
    "You get what you're given, it's all how you use it."
    Pink - "God is a DJ"

  7. #17
    Junior Member Maizy's Avatar
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    I've no qualms telling someone something along those lines. I don't feel hypocritical for it, because I feel it's what I've had to do to get along. But it's not so much what you say as it is how you say it.

    Berating someone to be proactive will not get anyone anywhere.. a bit of encouragement may push someone to make a positive change and "get their act together."

    Also, I am heavily influenced by my line of work. I work at at DV/Homeless shelter and there I've seen how enabling can hurt more than it heals.

  8. #18
    Senior Member KDude's Avatar
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    I worked at a homeless shelter once before too. I never spoke to anyone in a counseling type of way like you it seems.. I was just there to help around. Kept some people company, tried to make friends, etc.. But, there was one incident where a drunk kept knocking on the door after hours, acting belligerent. Then we tried to talk him away, and he broke through.. I almost beat the guy up. I kicked him out.. but in an extreme case like that, then yeah.. I'll berate someone.. "Get it together.. also, get the hell out of here too.. " I just don't know how to be so authoritative in a casual setting. Maybe if I really had a leg to stand on, but honestly, I have my own problems. I have no place to speak like that with the majority of people.

  9. #19
    Junior Member craigensa's Avatar
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    I have an INFP female friend (told her to take the test and she came out as definite), and I thought they were good listeners...recently when I've been upset or something and I've come on fbook chat to her, she would start talking to me asking what was wrong, I would go into a bit more detail and she would make maybe one comment and then go offline, not texting me or anything. This isn't really like her...we've been there for each other in the past. I was genuinely upset...parent issues...divorced but still living together and they're both being horrible.

    Is there something wrong with her that she's not telling me about? I concede that I had a moment with her when I told her I liked her...unreturned...so we spent a few months out of contact then got into contact recently. She sent me a very sweet card on my bday not too long ago and it seems like things are all good. Is there still residual fallout? It seemed like she was being very hypocritical by just not paying any attention to me, as she has mother issues too.
    "Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life." Berthold Auerbach

  10. #20
    morose bourgeoisie
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    Quote Originally Posted by flameskull95 View Post
    Are we?

    I.E - Don't you feel like telling some people to 'suck it up' or 'put your act together'.
    But then not saying it 'cause you'd notice how hypocritical we'd be because we would probably and might obviously do the same.
    Sometimes a person need to hear those words.

    Sometimes I need to hear them.

    So what? we're all imperfect. (I like this one!)

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