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[NF] NF's and reading people, social settings and emotions

nolla

Senor Membrane
Joined
May 22, 2008
Messages
3,166
MBTI Type
INFP
Hi you other NF's! I was wondering if the following "issues" are common among NF's...

Yes to all of the questions. I actually can't help asking in my mind "doesn't everyone do this"... It comes very automatically and naturally to me. At least the people reading part. Sometimes the empathy isn't there, but that is usually when I am doubting the persons motives (this intervenes, since I can't empathize if I don't know they really are feeling what they are feeling).

Another question for NF's:

When meeting with new people, do you "feel" the person you meet? (Not physically, but in your "mind"/"body")

My own experience:
Some people "feel" very warm when meeting them. It's a soothing feeling of comfort with them. They don't actually feel warm when I touch them nor do I feel actually warmness in me, but I describe the feeling I get from them as warmness.
---
Or is just that I personally react to certain emotions with certain feelings in myself and it's not actually about how the other person is, but more like how I connect emotions to certain "feeling responses" in myself?

I've come to trust this instinct. I don't usually pay attention to it if the feeling I get is either good or something I understand. It's like, mostly I can guess pretty accurately the things people are stressed about, or actually, what I see are their defenses. But I never act on it, if it is something normal, there's nothing to worry about. But then there are the people I get all kinds of weird vibes from. I will watch out for them... Too many times I should have been more careful with certain people.

I guess this skill is about body language and interpreting how it fits a situation. It is hard to trust this fully, though, since how can I know when I am projecting?

Even more common is an outsized confidence that they've read people correctly.

Good reminder.

Kind of like the way where you flip through tv channels, only see a quick blip of some movie, and you get an idea of what it is. Except I usually don't mind looking closer. Even though some people might have something recognizable about them, they're always unique too. As long as they're pleasant people, I wouldn't mind the company, and I would eventually see something that surprises me (and I kind of want to be surprised..in a good way at least).

That's a great metaphor. :yes:
 

Onceajoan

New member
Joined
Apr 22, 2010
Messages
239
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
1w2
NFs are psychic. No further analysis or understanding necessary.
 

copperfish17

New member
Joined
Dec 13, 2009
Messages
712
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
I just can't help but rag on the type who does the most cowardly personal attacks most often. Most INTPs offend my Fi with that little trait.

Hmm... that's quite strange, IMO. How would you personally define "cowardly"? I ask because from what I've seen, you'll rarely find INTP's who would hold back when they really mean to attack someone.
 

nolla

Senor Membrane
Joined
May 22, 2008
Messages
3,166
MBTI Type
INFP
Hmm... that's quite strange, IMO. How would you personally define "cowardly"?

My guess: Sarcasm. Or some other passive-aggressive moves.

I guess it is more common among NFs to count sarcasm as an attack... and the least common among INTPs, hah!
 

Amargith

Hotel California
Joined
Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4dw
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
NFs are psychic. No further analysis or understanding necessary.

Grin..yes,we are the witches and magicians of this world *spooky witch emoticon I still have to petition Haight for*

Seriously, I think it can sometimes come off that way coz it's so hard to explain it and pinpoint how it works. Personally I kinda like that kinda mystery surrounding it, but it does create difficulties with credibility unfortunately.
 

You

New member
Joined
Jun 8, 2010
Messages
2,124
MBTI Type
entp
Enneagram
7w8
Hogwarts, here we come?
 

angell_m

Permabanned
Joined
Jul 6, 2010
Messages
818
MBTI Type
IxFx
Enneagram
5w4
Whatever happens, I will not touch any of yous brooms.
 

Arclight

Permabanned
Joined
Nov 5, 2009
Messages
3,177
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
6w5
I am so acute .. I can pick up a change in a person over IM Chat..
 

stalemate

Post-Humorously
Joined
May 6, 2010
Messages
1,402
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w6
INA; said:
Even more common is an outsized confidence that they've read people correctly.

I knew you felt that way.
 

KDude

New member
Joined
Jan 26, 2010
Messages
8,243
He has a point though.. Maybe an unnecessary one, but one's ability to intuitively draw a conclusion on social patterns is.. only as good as one's research/experience. A young NF could withdraw from people thinking he/she read something to be cautious about, when it might be that they're just not used to the new situation, and drew a conclusion from limited experiences.

At least, this is how Ne would work. Everything I've read speaks of it in terms of tying random patterns together and coming up with a possibility from that. Not psychic behavior. I mean.. we're still dealing with psychology anyways. I don't think it was meant to take into account other phenomena (even though they may be real too.. sometimes I get impressions that are almost strictly in the realm of "feeling" somehow.. not so much perception. I don't know what to say about any of that, although it's helped me at times, for sure).
 

Vamp

New member
Joined
Jul 2, 2010
Messages
579
MBTI Type
ENFP
Hmm... that's quite strange, IMO. How would you personally define "cowardly"? I ask because from what I've seen, you'll rarely find INTP's who would hold back when they really mean to attack someone.

Passive aggressive swipes at others, sideways angles, backhanded compliments, backbiting etc.,. Sarcasm. As was said earlier.
 

Billy

Crazy Diamond
Joined
Oct 20, 2009
Messages
1,192
MBTI Type
INFJ
My most natural talent is figuring out peoples motives. It's something I have been able to do since I was a kid. In 3rd grade I knew exactly who stole my macho man randy savage doll, I even convinced him to give it back. I love mind fucking.
 

Vamp

New member
Joined
Jul 2, 2010
Messages
579
MBTI Type
ENFP
My most natural talent is figuring out peoples motives. It's something I have been able to do since I was a kid. In 3rd grade I knew exactly who stole my macho man randy savage doll, I even convinced him to give it back. I love mind fucking.

If someone had stolen my Macho Man doll I'd have elbow dropped them from the top rope OHHHHHHHHHHHH YEEEEEEEEEEEAH!
 

KDude

New member
Joined
Jan 26, 2010
Messages
8,243
I never had a macho man doll, but I did shed tears when Hulk Hogan bodyslammed Andre. So I'm just gonna bond with you on that. :cool:
 

Billy

Crazy Diamond
Joined
Oct 20, 2009
Messages
1,192
MBTI Type
INFJ
If someone had stolen my Macho Man doll I'd have elbow dropped them from the top rope OHHHHHHHHHHHH YEEEEEEEEEEEAH!

I am not sure what cognitive function it is that makes me good at that kind of shit, but the elbow slam was the last resort, most effective as well, but then I would have had to deal with all those pesky ramification like going to the principals office etc and ruin my scholastic career from then forward, oh the thoughts of a 3rd grader.

His mind was weak though and I was able to plant suggestions to get what I wanted. :p
 

Billy

Crazy Diamond
Joined
Oct 20, 2009
Messages
1,192
MBTI Type
INFJ
I never had a macho man doll, but I did shed tears when Hulk Hogan bodyslammed Andre. So I'm just gonna bond with you on that. :cool:

I always sided with the bad guy, I liked the Hulkster better when he was a bad guy. But that was an awesome match. :D
 

Vamp

New member
Joined
Jul 2, 2010
Messages
579
MBTI Type
ENFP
I am not sure what cognitive function it is that makes me good at that kind of shit, but the elbow slam was the last resort, most effective as well, but then I would have had to deal with all those pesky ramification like going to the principals office etc and ruin my scholastic career from then forward, oh the thoughts of a 3rd grader.

His mind was weak though and I was able to plant suggestions to get what I wanted. :p

Exactly. I don't think most people realize how susceptible to suggestion we are.
 
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