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  1. #61
    Vaguely Precise Seymour's Avatar
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    I find my INFJ friend and acquaintances to be really quite different once you get past the surface. Were we INFPs tend to often come across as alternately warm or withdrawn, it seems like INFJs often come across and more cold and critical than they feel internally. While we INFPs can definitely be critical, I think that judgment isn't nearly as visible externally as it is for INFJs (unless one of our core value land mines gets stepped on).

    For example, I see my INFJ coworker at work continually pushing and nudging things in the direction she believes they could go. She will sometimes ruffle feathers and create controversy in way that I as an INFP rarely do. I think INFJs tend to be more polarizing on the whole. When I campaign for a change, it's definitely done subtlety by talking to people one on one and trying to win them over that way. I think the influence of INFPs tends to be more subtle and less visible.

    I also find my INFJ acquaintances to be more suspicious of motives and more likely to see inconsistencies in behavior… and even to ascribe motive to those inconsistencies, where as I tend to chalk up those things to mood and/or flakiness. I feel like unchecked Ni can lead to a kind of credulity about conspiracies and alternative medicines (although certainly not true of all INFJs... and certainly inferior and tertiary Ni can be prone to this, too). And, of course, that's not to say the Ne is always accurate, either.

    Anyway, I think there's a world of difference between INFJ and INFP, even if we can have very similar values. Our functions have opposite orientations and I think that makes a big difference (J vs P means opposite orientation for every function, after all). I find expecting some mismatch/misunderstanding when interacting with INFJs helps me avoid unpleasant surprises.


    EDIT: Subjectively, once you get past the (sometimes cool) surface other INFPs feel like external warmth/softness surrounding a steel core. INFJs feel like external spikiness surrounding a warm interior. To outside appearances, INFPs look softer and more flexible than they are, while INFJs look more critical and less warm than they are.

  2. #62
    Earth Exalted Thursday's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by angell_m View Post
    What do you mean, googly eyes? I don't think I have googly eyes.
    like when the girl looks at you with smiling and lively eyes, but is too timid or coy too actual confess her feelings or make a move.

    Hence why attracting dominant women is such a relief; even if they don't make a definite move, like directly ask you out, they at least show interest

    Am I correct or is this just my experience?
    I N V I C T U S

  3. #63
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thursday View Post
    like when the girl looks at you with smiling and lively eyes, but is too timid or coy too actual confess her feelings or make a move.

    Hence why attracting dominant women is such a relief; even if they don't make a definite move, like directly ask you out, they at least show interest

    Am I correct or is this just my experience?
    I don't know. The only ones I notice are the "Vanessa Marcil"- types, and they are the only ones that seem to notice me. They're just... natural, with everything they say and do, and they don't really seem to give a damn about.. what.. we think make us weird?

    [YOUTUBE=hrYFQ0kTumo]Vanessa Marcil at Ellen Show[/YOUTUBE]

  4. #64
    meh Salomé's Avatar
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    Weird or not, let's not forget that the Sexiest Man ALIVE is an INFP.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  5. #65
    Earth Exalted Thursday's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by angell_m View Post
    I don't know. The only ones I notice are the "Vanessa Marcil"- types, and they are the only ones that seem to notice me. They're just... natural, with everything they say and do, and they don't really seem to give a damn about.. what.. we think make us weird?

    [YOUTUBE=hrYFQ0kTumo]Vanessa Marcil at Ellen Show[/YOUTUBE]
    I concurr
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  6. #66
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    Quote Originally Posted by Morgan Le Fay View Post
    Weird or not, let's not forget that the Sexiest Man ALIVE is an INFP.
    I'm just not convinced. Maybe I don't see it in my life is all. I sure want to though.

  7. #67
    Earth Exalted Thursday's Avatar
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    i was recently told that letting my guard down and trusting in the relationship is pretty damn cool. crying in front of her out of joy(the only reason I cry) probably earned extra points.
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  8. #68
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    I don't cry. Ever.

  9. #69
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    Quote Originally Posted by Abstract Thinker View Post
    Agreed, but the thing about me is, there's no middle ground when it comes to violence. Cross the line and the rage overwhelms me. That's why I relate so much to what angell_m said.

    Fortunately, it takes a lot to make me angry, the only exception being a threat to my loved ones.

    INFP or just me?
    I read your longer post and I cheered on the inside. I don't know if it's INFP or just you, but I 100% agree with you. There is ABSOLUTELY no force on this earth strong enough to stop me from destroying you if you ever hurt the people I love. Non-physical abuse from others, fine, I'd take my loved ones aside, and do my NF thing, but physical violence against my loved ones WILL NEVER happen as long as I am within an arms length of them.

    Never.

  10. #70
    meinmeinmein! mmhmm's Avatar
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    i've been hanging out with an infj guy
    for about two years. very loyal, very charming.

    but he crosses between being a complete
    doormat and having super high expectations
    of people around him even though he's stubborn
    about the stupidest shit... always has to learn
    the hard long way...

    i have to edit in my head what we talk about
    i never really wanna hear his 'life stories' or
    'what's going on now stories'...

    so we just sit and eat.
    every normal man must be tempted, at times,
    to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag,
    and begin slitting throats.
    h.l. mencken

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