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  1. #11
    Crazy Diamond Billy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lillyofthevalley View Post
    I hope I can get my thoughts across here. Do you often unconsciously assess the 'bigger picture' automatically before reacting to a situation? For example: At a restaurant with a group of people, the waitress (Hispanic) was taking our order for drinks. One of our group asked for a 'Blue Hawaiian' but the waitress was having trouble understanding what our group member was saying. Another one in the group got real testy with the lady. I shot the group member a dirty look. His final words were that the establishment should not hire people who don't speak perfect English. To me, it was irrelevant. The waitress was here, we were here, why not help the waitress until she got it right?

    Here's another scenario: Someone may be telling me about DVD players and without realizing it they may interject the wrong word. For example, they may at some point say TV instead of DVD player. I don't correct them because I know what they mean, what's the point? Yet, I'll be interrupted all the time by my BF which causes the conversation to stop. I've asked him before, "do you know what I'm talking about"? Yes. "Then why is it a big deal to correct me?" I have no problem with someone telling me I said the wrong word after I'm done, I just don't see the necessity to interrupt people for something that simple. Unfortunately, for some people, interjecting the wrong word completely confuses them, I guess. In that case, it's important to stop the conversation to clarify it.

    It would be different if I was giving an important demonstration at work or something but otherwise...who cares?

    Is this something that other INFJ's experience often?
    Yes that accurately describes how I let a lot of stuff slide in life. In the scope of things something so petty isnt worth getting upset over. Its easier to just correct the situation so that it works properly. And everyone comes out on top.
    Ground control to Major Tom

  2. #12
    Member Affably Evil's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Billy View Post
    Yes that accurately describes how I let a lot of stuff slide in life. In the scope of things something so petty isnt worth getting upset over. Its easier to just correct the situation so that it works properly. And everyone comes out on top.
    Exactly this. I'd rather have a smooth situation than to punish someone for making it temporarily unsmooth. It bothers me when people cause more friction than there was originally unnecessarily, especially when I don't see it leading to any kind of solution.

  3. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mister Eyebrows View Post

    I would love to hear if he actually had an answer for this
    I've called him on it a few times, he doesn't have much to say...but by this time the conversation has gone off on a tangent.

    Another scenario: Worker #1 needs someone to cover a shift so he asks worker #2 if she will cover for him. Worker #2 respectfully apologizes and says that she can't but gives no reason. When worker # 1 mentions it to another coworker, he is asked what the explanation was from worker #2 as to why she couldn't cover. Worker #1 says "I don't know, she didn't say." Now coworker says "Well, why didn't you ask, I would have", as if worker #1 has a screw loose. The fact is, it may not be important to worker #1, if he gets turned down by one person, the only important thing is to move on to try getting coverage from another...end of story.

    A scenario of what my ex-husband was like: I open a cupboard, out falls a vase and breaks in a million bits. When the hubby comes home I tell him that the vase broke. He asks how it happened...I tell him. Now all the questions start....Why was it in that cupboard anyway? Why wasn't it placed further back on the shelf? I finally get pissed off and yell, "It's broken, an accident, it's over and done with, let's just move on!" The deed is done and the fact remains...sheesh!
    Last edited by lillyofthevalley; 07-28-2010 at 06:50 PM. Reason: missing words.

  4. #14
    Senior Member Tiltyred's Avatar
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    Stop telling on yourself! And when you get the 3rd degree, answer something vague and stupid. Eventually, they will know better than to ask you. I would have been wide-eyed and "I don't know!" to all those questions. :-)

  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by lillyofthevalley View Post
    Another scenario: Worker #1 needs someone to cover a shift so he asks worker #2 if she will cover for him. Worker #2 respectfully apologizes and says that she can't but gives no reason. When worker # 1 mentions it to another coworker, he is asked what the explanation was from worker #2 as to why she couldn't cover. Worker #1 says "I don't know, she didn't say." Now coworker says "Well, why didn't you ask, I would have", as if worker #1 has a screw loose. The fact is, it may not be important to worker #1, if he gets turned down by one person, the only important thing is to move on to try getting coverage from another...end of story.

    A scenario of what my ex-husband was like: I open a cupboard, out falls a vase and breaks in a million bits. When the hubby comes home I tell him that the vase broke. He asks how it happened...I tell him. Now all the questions start....Why was it in that cupboard anyway? Why wasn't it placed further back on the shelf? I finally get pissed off and yell, "It's broken, an accident, it's over and done with, let's just move on!" The deed is done and the fact remains...sheesh!
    God, you continue describe the worst things in the world. Let's all incessantly drill people and hope that that helps anything at all

    People like your ex sometimes shut up when they finally get to a "why" that's their fault. Other times, they try to turn it back on others. In any case, they tend to believe that anyone who does anything different from what they'd do is apparently just a huge incapable retard

    derp

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