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  1. #1
    Senior Member lightsun's Avatar
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    Default The Language of love

    ‎"The Language of Love"
    The author Gary Chapman came out with 5 basic styles of love in a relationships in his book The Five Love Languages. The five languages are as follows.
    I. Words of Affirmation style.
    Communication to be used : compliments, affirmation, kind words
    Actions to be taken with this style: send notes and cards.
    What to avoid: criticism.
    II. The quality time style.
    Communication to be used : one to one time, not interrupting, face to face conversation.
    Actions to be taken with this style: take long walks together, doing things together, taking trips.
    What to avoid with this style: long periods of being apart, more time with friends than with spouse.

    III. The receiving gifts style.
    Communication to be used with this style : positive, fact oriented information.
    Actions to take with this style : giving gifts on special occasions and not so special occasions.
    What to avoid : forgetting special day.

    IV. The acts of service type.
    Communication to be used with this style : action words like "I can," "I will," "What else can I do?"
    Actions to be taken with this style : helping with house and yard chores, repair/maintenance, acts of kindness.
    What to avoid : ignoring spouse's requests while helping others.

    V. The physical touch type.
    Communication to be used with this type : a lot of non verbals, verbals need to be word pictures.
    Actions to be taken with this type : touches, hugs, pats, kisses
    What to avoid : physical neglect or abuse.

  2. #2
    Starcrossed Seafarer Aquarelle's Avatar
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    I looooove this book! I think it really makes a lot of sense.

    I'm the physical touch type, followed by words of affirmation, I think.
    Masquerading as a normal person day after day is exhausting.

    My blog:
    TypeC: Adventures of an Introvert
    Wordpress: http://introvertadventures.wordpress.com/

  3. #3
    ReflecTcelfeR
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    Most definitly quality time and physical touch... affirmation third, acts of service, and then receiving gifts.

  4. #4
    Member Cephalonimbus's Avatar
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    I haven't read the book, but i remember taking an online test on this not too long ago. I'm not sure but i think i scored highest on words of affirmation, followed closely by physical touch and quality time. I scored really low on the other two.
    ik sprokkel wat dagen, drop baggage,
    soms heb ik geen zin om die koffers te dragen,
    ik laat los, los het op, word onzichtbaar
    en geef de buitenlucht wat ruimte terug
    dus.. nu zit ik op m'n fiets alsof het niets is,
    maar niets kan toch niet uit zichzelf pedalen laten draaien?

    ~ Typhoon

  5. #5
    THIS bitch stringstheory's Avatar
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    my preference goes somewhat like
    1. physical touch
    2. quality time
    3. words of affirmation
    4. receiving gifts
    5. acts of service
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    Introverted Feeling (46.7)
    Extraverted Intuition (45.7)
    Introverted Intuition (37.5)
    Introverted Thinking(26.5)
    Extraverted Feeling (25.4)
    Extraverted Thinking (22.1)
    Extraverted Sensing (19.5)
    Introverted Sensing (17.0)



  6. #6
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
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    Words>Physical Touch>Quality time>Acts>Gifts.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  7. #7
    Senior Member lightsun's Avatar
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    MEASURING 6 BASIC STYLES OF LOVE :
    This is a second typology from the one listed in the above posts. It is to be used as a companion
    and a comparison to the above listed The Five Love Languages.
    Listed below are sample items Hendrick and Hendrick's love scale, which was designed to measure
    the six styles of love identified by Lee (1977, 1988). Read through the various items and think
    about your current or past relationships. Which style or styles characterize each of these relationships?
    According to Lee, people could experience many different styles of love during their lives.

  8. #8
    Senior Member lightsun's Avatar
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    EROS :
    1. My lover and I were attracted to each other immediately after we first met.
    2. Our lovemaking is very intense and satisfying.
    3. My lover fits my ideal standards of physical beauty/handsomeness

  9. #9
    Senior Member lightsun's Avatar
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    LUDUS :
    1. I try to keep my lover a little uncertain about my commitment to him/her.
    2. I have sometimes had to keep two of my lovers from finding out about each other.
    3. I enjoy playing the "game of love" with a number of different partners.

  10. #10
    Senior Member lightsun's Avatar
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    STORGE :
    1. It is hard to say exactly when my lover and I fell in love. (Our friendship merged gradually into love over time.)
    2. Love is really a deep friendship, not a mysterious emotion.
    3. My most satisfying love relationships have developed from good friendships.

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