User Tag List

First 33414243444553 Last

Results 421 to 430 of 732

  1. #421
    Butterfly Amargith's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    Enfp
    Enneagram
    497 sx/so
    Socionics
    IEx None
    Posts
    14,529

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Pitseleh View Post
    "Bad listeners" but other than that, they are pretty cool. They will listen for a minute and then jump to several unfounded conclusions due to projection and minimal efforts to clarify what the other person saying before responding (this can come off as very judgmental). Also, talking over people in a group setting is kind of annoying.
    Overactive Ne

    Often it's a sign of having a hyperactive ENFP on your hands, at least in my case
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Be careful what you believe, because that is the world you'll create - Cassie Nightingale

  2. #422
    Senior Member chachamaru's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    ?
    Socionics
    EXPP
    Posts
    451

    Default

    I touch things.

    Sticky, gross things.

    And then forget to wash my hands before putting them in my mouth.

    Like this morning. Slime in the dirty dog bowl. Removed a piece of breakfast from my teeth. Awesome.
    a cat is fine too

  3. #423
    i love skylights's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 so/sx
    Socionics
    EII Ne
    Posts
    7,836

    Default

    oh god dammit i do that too. this morning i had my hands all up in scented lotion and then i went and bit my thumbnail in thought during an essay. tasted like slimey flowers

    Quote Originally Posted by Pitseleh
    "Bad listeners" but other than that, they are pretty cool. They will listen for a minute and then jump to several unfounded conclusions due to projection and minimal efforts to clarify what the other person saying before responding (this can come off as very judgmental). Also, talking over people in a group setting is kind of annoying.
    yeahh, Ne overdrive.

    just so you know, i feel like it's really weird that Fe/Ti users want me to ask them questions for clarification. like, i assume that yall are going to tell me everything you possibly can up front. that might be part of the reason why some ENFPs seem quickly judgmental. we Te on the basis of what we're given, instead of assuming that there might be more. (which, i understand why you would ask questions - because perhaps the other person doesn't understand certain parts of what you're saying as well - but that's not an automatic thought for me. i just kind of take what i'm given and go.)

  4. #424
    Glycerine
    Guest

    Default

    For me, personally, I reword what someone says from my perspective as a question to verify that we are on the same page but I got to say I have gotten a little lazy with that lately. lol

  5. #425
    i love skylights's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 so/sx
    Socionics
    EII Ne
    Posts
    7,836

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Pitseleh View Post
    For me, personally, I reword what someone says from my perspective as a question to verify that we are on the same page but I got to say I have gotten a little lazy with that lately. lol


    that makes sense. i feel like sometimes i have to do it with the NFJs i know because i'm not always sure i understand what kind of Ni point they're getting at.

  6. #426
    Senior Member pinkgraffiti's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    748 sx/so
    Posts
    1,489

    Default

    Thank you for this explanation. Reading through this thread made me understand many things about my behavior and your post was just the cherry on top of the cake. In fact as a scientist I have to try and be focused and organized. In fact I'm a total amateur at this and sometimes I freak out and develop a bitchy side. This was the reason I took several MBTI tests, I wasn't convinced I was a "true" ENFP. And after all, it was all in that nasty Te lol... thank you
    Quote Originally Posted by Orobas View Post
    ENFPs seem to be exceptionally diverse in how we present ourselves to the public-likely showing an underlying diversity in our development as you point out above.

    My guess is that Ne makes us very flexible, and without any Fe filter, those differences among individuals become very easy to see. Ne also makes us neurotic as hell, thus we are forced to learn adaptation skills (aka weird cognitive development patterns) early on. I'd suggest other MBTI types are just as diverse under the hood, but just do a better job at looking "normal".

    The ENFPs I meet tend towards the more Te side because they are in a corporate, scientific workplace. So I miss a whole chunk of the population as a result. I dont see flirting or attention seeking behaviors, or overt failure to follow up.. I do see blunt, overly direct communication, and complete obliviousness to intricate political Fe networks. WHAM! goes the Te hammer. The EXTPs all cringe.

    The down side to the Te heavy approach is that we are extroverting erratic tert Te. We dont look like a Te aux-we look like an immature Te dom who is kinda emo and hyper.

    We have baby ESTJs inside of us. If you totally quell the Fi, then the Te ENFPs can be very harsh and abrasive. Also under stress, we can become picky about stupid things-Si. So we are busy learning all the lessons ESTJs learned from ages 10 to 25. The best way to handle seems to keep the Fi near the surface and allow it to soften your reactions to the person-but not soften the Te analysis of the problem. It is a balancing act.

    Having said that I have had two ENFP COOs and an ENFP VP-all picked by an INTJ CEO. All male. They can be superb.

    The latest COO is fascinating as he "feels" blank. Fi feels people and I would reach out to "feel" him and feel nothing. However I can feel him feeling me at times. He is exceptionally observant of people dynamics on an individual level. A simple glance will stop him in his tracks and divert his attention. There have been a few times I have had unspoken Fi convos with him. Sort of a mutual agreement that didnt really involve words-then stuff happens to fix the issue.

    In meetings however the tert Te comes out and he will be direct and challenging-but without the Ne silliness or Fi defensive responses most enfps show. In one on one meetings you see the Ne begin to emerge as he skips huge numbers of steps, makes eye contact and we "just get it".

    The VP is like my older brother clone. My ENTP best friend works for him and wants to kill him. Hyperactive Ne, with more defensive Fi knee jerk responses then would be ideal but all funneled outwards in Te action plans.

    He once said "I dont understand what it is that we are discussing, but someone needs to make a decision. I will make the decision and take full responsibility on my back, if it allows us to move forward and make progress."

    The ENTPs call us "reactive" as we just plow straight through Fe and do so with a very quick response time.




    A little insertion of Ne insanity to go a long way in dealing with ISTJs

  7. #427
    Senior Member pinkgraffiti's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    748 sx/so
    Posts
    1,489

    Default

    omg, i can't believe i finally made it to the end of this thread...hurrey for me, uff! ok let me contribute to the chorus of enfp discussions: so great list yadda yadda, but minor things i don't agree with:
    - i really really don't have a problem finishing things...love to start stuff, get zzzzzz in the middle it's true, but love to finish them and get rid of the responsibility too. i only did not finish one thing i set my mind to once in my life, and i suffered like crazy for years (emotionally, self-inflicted pain, terrible guilt feelings, etc)
    - i have no problems apologizing?! i think i do it all the time...terribly self-conscious, always wondering if my inter-personal relationships are ok, i think i play that game "did you get what i said? / i meant x/ sorry if i made you feel y/ so we're ok yeah? ok ok great"
    - love maths. i think it's so refreshing that you only need to abide to a couple of rules and then you can make up the way you want that it will work out in the end. you don't have to memorize things, don't have to follow stupid rules, just use logic and do it your way.

    Oh and regarding someone who a couple of posts back was saying how they met an ENFP and they were a bitch blah blah, hey girl like john lennon said "i just believe in me". there are no gods, no groups are perfect. this is what life has taught me so far

    Last thing, is this thread dead? Come on people, I only just arrived, please help a poor ENFP. Pleeeease eheh

  8. #428
    Senior Member knight's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    MBTI
    entp
    Enneagram
    9
    Posts
    409

    Default

    this is a great thread

  9. #429
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    1w2 so/sx
    Posts
    10,275

    Default

    So, I was just talking with an ENFP friend of mine on the phone. (We'll refer to him as M). He's in his 50s now and has done a little bit of everything throughout his life in terms of work: worked on the railroad, was a ParksCanada person for a bit, did carpentry etc. When I met him 7 years ago, a bunch of us were at an orientation for a school division. He had gone back to school and gotten an ed degree and a degree in counselling. Since that time he has:

    Gotten hired as a counsellor, but was fired from the first place for tangling with the principal over treatment of chidren. Was paid out for the rest of the year, but asked to leave.

    Started counselling during that time for a band run school. They are notorious for covering up problems and so he was unpopular for exposing some of the things that he felt were not right.

    Went to the east coast and was a travelling counsellor between several inner city schools. One of the principal's there was known as a bully and 12 teachers took him on. Unfortunately this guy was the only one who did not have any tenure, so he got canned. He tried to fight it but the union was not interested, as it could be perceived as a racial issue (the principal was black). The principal later got fired for manhandling a kid, but was later reinstated as principal. M was paid out for the rest of the year.

    He then went to northern Saskatchewan and became a counsellor at a school which was very isolated and had a high suicide rate. They liked him so well that he was promoted to something like a counselling consultant. However, he tangled with them over them changing counsellors into only guidance/career counsellor positions instead of dealing with the real problems that are rife in small northern reserve communities. They gave him a make work project that was obviously meant to keep him out of trouble and he went on stress leave as a protest.

    Now he is being hired to go and VP in one of the worst places in northern Canada - a community that was so notorious for children sniffing gas that they actually relocated the community in hopes of making a fresh start.

    While M is somewhat dreamy and impractical at times, his heart is certainly in the right place and I think he does have some valuable attributes and insights to offer. To me, it seems that his strong outspoken Fi results in him disregarding the final outcome (he can't do any good advocating for kids if he gets fired, and he also is making it less and less likely that he can impact people if he is unemployable because of a dodgy work record). I think his observations are definitely valid, and there's a possibility he could effect change if he were willing to work within the system and influence the leadership rather than start by outright opposition or refusal to do anything that he disagrees with.

    From my interactions here, I realize how much like selling out that seems to a Fi user. Is there any way that you people can see (as he goes into a new situation) where he can be true to himself and still remain employed a year from now? I wish I could help him somehow, as this is very distressing to him, but he seems to be repeating the same mistakes over and over. The ironic part is that his specialty is conflict resolution! Any suggestions or perspective that would be of help, even in terms of how I look at it?

  10. #430
    Butterfly Amargith's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    Enfp
    Enneagram
    497 sx/so
    Socionics
    IEx None
    Posts
    14,529

    Default

    Man..I so relate to that. This is why I can't find my place in the business world. The jobs however he's doing sound very interesting. So. His specialty is conflict resolution? That would mean he can very well see where either party is coming from. My guess is what he hasn't learned yet (and mind you, this sounds mighty arrogant coming from someone just about half his age, but ok), is how to step outside the situation himself. He probably can negotiate conflicts fine, as long as he's detached from them. The second however his values get hit, that kneejerk Te-reaction burns all his bridges. And I get why. I'd be raging inside as well, however, as you said, that keeps him from actually getting anything done in those places.

    He needs to learn how to step outside the situation, and ask himself: if you were resolving the conflict between someone like you, and the other party...what would be beneficial? How would you go about it. How would you reframe victory in that situation? What would you recommend, if this wasn't your fight, but someone elses.

    Also, if he knows about MBTI, give him this to read:

    Tertiary Te (ExFP): "Unfair!! I have to stick to my guns, I will not be bullied or cheated. Any number of authorities agree with me. All my friends agree with me. Everyone can see that my response is directly mandated by the situation: anything else would be irresponsible. These facts absolutely settle the matter, and there is no point in looking at it any further." The Secondary Function (Fi) would say: "Fair or not, reasonable or not, recognized by anyone or not, what would truly accomplish some good here?"
    from: http://greenlightwiki.com/lenore-exe...ary_Temptation

    Tertiary Te temptation shows itself through slamming your fist on the table and going: 'That's not acceptable!' And it's tempting to do that, coz it' takes a loooooooot more patience and work and willingness to accept reality to step back, curb your frustrations and work out what the situation needs to de-escalate/resolve. Granted, sometimes the shock effect that Tertiary Te can bring to things can actually get people startled enough to get their asses moving, so it has its useful moments...but not in these kinds of situations..especially not with your boss and even less so with bureaucratic instances. Unfortunately however, these instances often llack of empathy, a good cause, and tend to have an the abundance of apathy, inefficiency and even corruption, so it's a hot trigger for Tertiary Te to come out swinging its hammer.

    So, in theory, it's doable to get him to adjust. But man, does it take a lot of patience and effort.

    Good luck
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Be careful what you believe, because that is the world you'll create - Cassie Nightingale

Similar Threads

  1. [INFP] Common INFP Issues
    By Seymour in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 395
    Last Post: 09-08-2017, 06:10 PM
  2. [INTJ] Common INTJ Issues
    By highlander in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 351
    Last Post: 09-06-2017, 06:02 PM
  3. [INFJ] Common INFJ issues
    By fidelia in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 685
    Last Post: 08-26-2017, 12:43 PM
  4. [ENFJ] Common ENFJ Issues
    By Domino in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 208
    Last Post: 06-15-2017, 10:25 PM
  5. [ISFP] Common ISFP Issues
    By highlander in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 101
    Last Post: 02-28-2017, 10:56 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts