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Thread: Common INFJ issues

  1. #591
    Biting Shards Array Dr Mobius's Avatar
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    I believe I may have stumbled upon a common issue for INFJs. Given that all INFJs are madly and helplessly in love with Tom Waits who is already married; how do you deal with not having this perfect relationship? I mean do you use a Tom Wait Likeness Measurer? Or alternatively have you given up, and are currently living in a secluded environ with his entire back catalogue and several cats?
    Even when the sun is shining, I can't avoid the lightning Oh, where did the blue skies go? And why is it raining so?

  2. #592
    Senior Member Array cafe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dr Mobius View Post
    I believe I may have stumbled upon a common issue for INFJs. Given that all INFJs are madly and helplessly in love with Tom Waits who is already married; how do you deal with not having this perfect relationship? I mean do you use a Tom Wait Likeness Measurer? Or alternatively have you given up, and are currently living in a secluded environ with his entire back catalogue and several cats?
    I had to google him. If I look up his lyrics is it going to ruin my marriage? And does it have to be cats? I don't like cats.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
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  3. #593
    wants Mifune clone minion Array Z Buck McFate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dr Mobius View Post
    I believe I may have stumbled upon a common issue for INFJs. Given that all INFJs are madly and helplessly in love with Tom Waits who is already married; how do you deal with not having this perfect relationship? I mean do you use a Tom Wait Likeness Measurer? Or alternatively have you given up, and are currently living in a secluded environ with his entire back catalogue and several cats?

    OMG, I love Tom Waits.

    I think I used something like a Tom Waits Likeness Measurer when I was younger, but the disappointment/reality of how nobody is really ever enough like Tom Waits to satisfy me eventually set in. Yes, I have indeed resigned to being a hermit with cats. Because if I can't have Tom, what's that point. (And thanks to the stupid restraining order, I can't even get close enough anymore to try to feed him enough pizza to create a clone. So yeah, cats.)
    Reality is a collective hunch. -Lily Tomlin

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    Biting Shards Array Dr Mobius's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    I had to google him. If I look up his lyrics is it going to ruin my marriage? And does it have to be cats? I don't like cats.
    I think that your husband would definitely appreciate you not looking checking his music out. The cats are just a place holder, armoured hamsters, flying mongooses whatever animal you can psychically control.

    Quote Originally Posted by Z Buck McFate View Post
    OMG, I love Tom Waits.

    I think I used something like a Tom Waits Likeness Measurer when I was younger, but the disappointment/reality of how nobody is really ever enough like Tom Waits to satisfy me eventually set in. Yes, I have indeed resigned to being a hermit with cats. Because if I can't have Tom, what's that point.
    Oh I completely understand, once I learned that it was indeed possible to create a miniature sun which I could then implode myself in.
    Well it really just took the shine off of any other relationship; to be part of a supernova

    Quote Originally Posted by Z Buck McFate View Post
    (And thanks to the stupid restraining order, I can't even get close enough anymore to try to feed him enough pizza to create a clone. So yeah, cats.)
    That is pure genius, who knew that the worlds exponential population growth was down to the increase in pizza consumption? Don’t worry about the restraining order though, it’s only a matter of time until an INFJ manages to feed him enough pizza; at which point I’m sure mass production will start.
    Even when the sun is shining, I can't avoid the lightning Oh, where did the blue skies go? And why is it raining so?

  5. #595
    To here knows when... Array Odi et Amo's Avatar
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    Does anyone, especially in an unhealthy period, daydream about others to maintain some feeling of closeness?
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  6. #596
    Senior Member Array autumnandtherain's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Odi et Amo View Post
    Does anyone, especially in an unhealthy period, daydream about others to maintain some feeling of closeness?
    Yes. That's kind of a default unhealthy thing that I do. I'm trying to get better at not doing that though because when I do I usually just end up feeling sad and apathetic.

  7. #597
    Fantasticality. Array Forever's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Odi et Amo View Post
    Does anyone, especially in an unhealthy period, daydream about others to maintain some feeling of closeness?

    Definitely. That works with disintegrating 1's as well too. Second that @autumnandtherain
    Why you looking for a harmony?
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  8. #598
    Junior Member Array goldrule2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Arclight View Post
    Just look at my friend list.. I like INFJs a lot.

    But the biggest issue with INFJs is right there in Fidelia's OP..

    Those are character flaws, not other people's "misunderstandings"
    You can spin it and justify it all you want. INFJs tend to have a very one way view of humanity. It never occurs to them that they might be the problem.

    No INFJ.. you are not perfect nor are you emotionally and morally pure.

    The Clue is in your humanity, and it's OK to be weak and flawed. Other people are not crazy or overstepping the boundaries for noticing. Other people still love and care about you even though they notice and mention things. And heaven forbid, if they don't follow the 19 rules of approaching an INFJ when presenting criticism.

    All this talk of insight and Fe and it's astounding how little you understand people sometimes.
    ********

    YOU are SO right Arclight !!!!! Thank you; spot on!!

    I have 2.5 INFJ friends --2 friendships for a very long time and the .5 friendship still formulating I think --good gawd - I really do wish my .5 acquaintance would recognize what the push me pull me/disappearance thing can do to friends . . . that would be true compassion I think. And . . . . perhaps step out of that INFJ "I am hiding behind a rock just observing you" for a while thing . . . many of us non-INFJs have also gone through that "developmental phase", but after a while we grow up and get over ourselves. . . . sorry to be so harsh but stepping of one's comfort zone is hard but carries many benefits in my experience.

  9. #599
    Junior Member Array goldrule2's Avatar
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    Speak for yourself uumlau I am very infjish when it comes to any INTP nerdishness; I keep that well hidden.

  10. #600
    Junior Member Array goldrule2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Arclight View Post
    I would prefer if you did not paraphrase me here. I called them "Character flaws" because that is what they are, They can not be fixed or altered because they are not seen as such. The 1st step to change and growth is admitting it is needed.

    There is nothing wrong with being flawed, because it is a universal truth of the human condition.
    I will say it again.. It's a one way insight into humanity. " I see into you, I see into me, I see you better than you can see yourself, and you can't see into me at all."
    Bravo arclight!!

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