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  1. #11
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    I don't think I've directly been called intense or deep before (probably because most of the time I don't really advertise much of what's going on inside or it never sees the light of day); however, growing up people usually thought I was sad or serious, and both impressions tended to keep people at a distance, I think.

    I have realized that I get the best feedback from others when I kind of squish down my introverted/contemplative nature, and keep that - my more natural, default state - under wraps. People respond very favorably to my more carefree, excitable, enthusiastic, playful, extroverted self (which is totally understandable, enthusiasm/passion is infectious no matter who's concerned - I respond the same way to it), which certainly sees the light of day maybe 30% of the time, and is definitely an important part of who I am, but then I've had it happen where they like that a lot, and then respond quite negatively/distastefully to my other sides, and want my happy side to come out again pronto. It's just interesting. Does depend on the type of person I'm interacting with; obviously some love all sides.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  2. #12
    Senior Member paradox fox's Avatar
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    The first thing I thought when I saw the title was this:
    INFJ, intense and deep,
    How do you get any sleep?
    Just because I'm an INFP doesn't mean I'm emo!

  3. #13
    facettes de la petite mor Words of Ivory's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by paradox fox View Post
    INFJ, intense and deep,
    How do you get any sleep?
    Most of the time I don't.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    "Life calls out the meaning of pure jubilance,
    if you'll only take the time to hear it."
    ~ Words of Ivory ~

  4. #14
    Senior Member Tiltyred's Avatar
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    Ambien

  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Words of Ivory View Post
    Calling INFJs deep and intense is a bit little calling the ocean a shallow paddle pool. Understatement of the century.
    For a second I thought you were saying that INFJ's AREN'T deep and intense. Lol.



    My mom actually claims to be an INFJ. They're a pretty rare type, but she seems to fit it well. People never really understand her on the surface and sometimes if you take a few minutes to talk to her, you may get the idea she's nuts. She sometimes admits that she feels like she is from "Mars" because no one has ever really understood her...and I believe it, seeing as the way my friends and casual acquaintances often respond to her. But when you really sit down and talk to her, she is so intuitive and full of good wisdom and it can be really helpful. At first she seems stubborn, opinionated, and rude and there is no WAY you can ever convince her that she's wrong on something, which caused me a lot of stress, especially as a kid. But once you give her a chance to really explain herself, she makes a lot of sense and almost always turns out to be right in her predictions.

    I have a question. Is it common for an INFJ to not realize when they have lost someone's interest...or to not pick up on cues? One thing I always noticed is that she would become so wrapped up in whatever deep topic she was interested in, she wouldn't recognize the nonverbal cues that people were giving to try and get out of the situation. That they needed to get somewhere or had simply lost interest in listening. I would realize they were doing it and try to convince her it was time to leave, but she just never really caught on. She gets so deep into her thoughts and discussions that trying to pull her out of whatever she's focused on is like trying to wake someone up from a coma.

    I know that INFJ's make up less than one percent of the population. But I'm pretty sure she is one.

    Do you respond in a serious or inquisitive manner to often light-hearted remarks?
    This always really annoyed me, lol. If I want to ask a simple question, I better expect to have an hour to spare. And I often make a joke or say something sarcastic thinking she will laugh and she ends up taking it literally and actually ANSWERING the question. Even if the answer is so...obvious. I guess it doesn't occur to her that the answer is just as obvious to anyone else as it is to her, and she's very patient and detailed about answering it. She's great for advice...although not always so much for humor, especially sarcasm. xD

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spastic_Blondie View Post




    I have a question. Is it common for an INFJ to not realize when they have lost someone's interest...or to not pick up on cues? One thing I always noticed is that she would become so wrapped up in whatever deep topic she was interested in, she wouldn't recognize the nonverbal cues that people were giving to try and get out of the situation. That they needed to get somewhere or had simply lost interest in listening. I would realize they were doing it and try to convince her it was time to leave, but she just never really caught on. She gets so deep into her thoughts and discussions that trying to pull her out of whatever she's focused on is like trying to wake someone up from a coma.

    I know that INFJ's make up less than one percent of the population. But I'm pretty sure she is one.



    This always really annoyed me, lol. If I want to ask a simple question, I better expect to have an hour to spare. And I often make a joke or say something sarcastic thinking she will laugh and she ends up taking it literally and actually ANSWERING the question. Even if the answer is so...obvious. I guess it doesn't occur to her that the answer is just as obvious to anyone else as it is to her, and she's very patient and detailed about answering it. She's great for advice...although not always so much for humor, especially sarcasm. xD

    If you're mom is anything like me, and it sounds like she is, she is probably well aware of other people's reactions, but she just can't help herself. Because I do not often let myself get wrapped up in discussing a topic, the few times that I do it's like I have to get it all out and say everything that I've been thinking about all at once. I think INFJs spend so much time listening to other people and processing their thoughts that it's like a reservoir of ideas builds up in their brains. Unlike most people, who can absorb and release thoughts in a steady stream, INFJs just absorb and absorb and absorb until eventually the dam breaks and everything comes spilling out. So it's entirely likely that after she's finished one of these episodes she is completely embarrassed and promises herself that she won't do it again. But of course, she has very little control over it, so it inevitably will happen again.

    On the sarcasm thing, I do this all the time. I totally understand that a remark is intended to be sarcastic and light, but because I also love knowing how things work, I usually have a serious answer that I just have to share as well. I've been working on biting my tongue more in these situations, but it's a really hard impulse to control. INFJs are just used to having all the answers!

  7. #17
    Senior Member Clonester's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Words of Ivory View Post
    Calling INFJs deep and intense is a bit little calling the ocean a shallow paddle pool. Understatement of the century.

    Do you ask lots of questions? Do you respond in a serious or inquisitive manner to often light-hearted remarks? Do you randomly start deep and thought-provoking conversations with little incentive from other people? Do you point out a lot of things you notice to people? Are you extremely forward and open about your opinions and observations?

    If the answer to even half of those is "yes", you already have your answer.
    Lol, I'm answering yes to all of those on behalf of my INFJ workmate. Thankfully he has a willing listener in an ENFP.
    ENFP Male: E-74% N-95% F-58% P-84% 3w2
    "I feel there are two people inside me - me and my intuition. If I go against her, she'll screw me every time, and if I follow her, we get along quite nicely." -Kim Basinger

  8. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by paradox fox View Post
    The first thing I thought when I saw the title was this:
    INFJ, intense and deep,
    How do you get any sleep?
    tell me about it... i finally fell asleep at 4am and had to be up at 6. argh!

  9. #19
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    INFJ`s can also walk on water, and OUR farts O brotha....rose peddles! most my deep thoughts are on the SHXXXER!

    (who wants to buy a vow or a letter?)

  10. #20
    Starcrossed Seafarer Aquarelle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KLessard View Post
    I have been told I was intense too, and it hasn't always been positive. Sometimes it means you are taking things too much to heart and seeing depth people hadn't intended and they will get annoyed at you for dramatizing the situation. Other people are enchanted that you are seeing deeper and complex elements in a situation and will compliment you on it.
    I totally hear this!! I know I'm intense and a deep thinker, and for the most part I like that about myself. BUT, I also am terrible at taking criticism - I take things much too personally and can sometimes make mountains out of molehills.

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