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  1. #41
    Professional Trickster Esoteric Wench's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by copperfish17 View Post
    Why is it that some people just... CRAVE to be "understood"? Out of curiosity.
    I think this CRAVING to be understood is a very Ne thing. For example, most ENFPs (with dominant Ne) I know would identify with this statement. Most INFPs (with dominant Fi) I know would not.

    Ne is so profoundly different from the way most people think. I think a lot of dominant intuitives feel different to the point that they might consider if something is "wrong" with them.

    So as an ENFP, I do indeed crave to be understood and to be able to share my thoughts with other people who "get it." By this I mean they see the world in similar ways that I do. This is usually people with dominant or auxillary N.

  2. #42
    Senior Member Ratsimoan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Esoteric Wench View Post
    I think this CRAVING to be understood is a very Ne thing. For example, most ENFPs (with dominant Ne) I know would identify with this statement. Most INFPs (with dominant Fi) I know would not.

    Ne is so profoundly different from the way most people think. I think a lot of dominant intuitives feel different to the point that they might consider if something is "wrong" with them.

    So as an ENFP, I do indeed crave to be understood and to be able to share my thoughts with other people who "get it." By this I mean they see the world in similar ways that I do. This is usually people with dominant or auxillary N.
    I feel exactly the same. I crave for someone to understand me, too. It's good to know I'm not the only one. I didn't know wanted to be understood is Ne thing, I thought it was because of my enneagram ( type 4).
    [SIGPIC] [/SIGPIC]

    Death must be so beautiful. To lie in the soft brown earth, with the grasses waving above one's head, and listen to silence. To have no yesterday, and no to-morrow. To forget time, to forgive life, to be at peace."
    — Sylvia Plath (The Bell Jar)

    "Remember, remember, this is now, and now, and now. Live it, feel it, cling to it. I want to become acutely aware of all I’ve taken for granted."
    — Sylvia Plath

  3. #43
    Senior Member Liesl's Avatar
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    I crave being understood too.

  4. #44
    Senior Member Vamp's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Esoteric Wench View Post
    I think this CRAVING to be understood is a very Ne thing. For example, most ENFPs (with dominant Ne) I know would identify with this statement. Most INFPs (with dominant Fi) I know would not.

    Ne is so profoundly different from the way most people think. I think a lot of dominant intuitives feel different to the point that they might consider if something is "wrong" with them.

    So as an ENFP, I do indeed crave to be understood and to be able to share my thoughts with other people who "get it." By this I mean they see the world in similar ways that I do. This is usually people with dominant or auxillary N.
    As I understand it, I am dominant Ne (75%) and I feel exactly this way. I've always second guessed every part of myself because I felt (still feel) there was something wrong with me.
    George Bernard Shaw in cartoon form.

  5. #45
    Senior Member copperfish17's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by stringstheory View Post
    I'm actually not sure I believe such an understanding is possible, really. The wide variety of experiences and knowledge that we all have as individuals transcends type methinks.
    Yes, that is true.

    i'm sort of the same actually..i often get mistaken for being "upset" in debates or discussions when i'm just kind of an enthusiastic person so i throw them in for good measure. IRL i can't use emoticons so i take full advantage on here!
    People have a VERY hard time IRL trying to tell if I’m joking or not when I make (what I think are) witty comments. It probably has something to do with my (mostly) expressionless face/voice.

    Quote Originally Posted by angelhair45 View Post
    I'm not just extending this to romantic relationships. My husband is ESTP. He genuinely loves me, but he doesn't get me or understand me the way a few friends in my life have.

    I think since I have to talk things out before I know how I feel about something, that makes me crave understanding. Usually I'm talking, talking, talking, and I know they don't "get" 50% if what I'm saying. It's such a wonderful experience when you can share your thoughts and ideas not only do they not look at you like you are a little crazy, but they even consider those ideas as possibilities themselves. It's always been an amazing experience for me when I feel understood. Probably because I always feel misunderstood. I also am and ENFP who grew up in a small town with an very well-known ISTJ for a step-father, and and ESTJ mother. Talk about feeling misunderstood. They thought I might be certifiably crazy because I was so different than they are So yeah, it's nice when people understand you.
    (No part of this is criticism, just so you know):

    Haha I grew up in a family full of SJ’s too! I can identify with most of what you’re talking about here. I am not as self-aware about such disparities in mindsets as you are however, nor do I perpetually feel misunderstood – I do think that people misunderstand me most of the time; it’s just that I’m not bothered in the least by such things. INTP apathy for the win.

    Quote Originally Posted by Esoteric Wench View Post
    I think this CRAVING to be understood is a very Ne thing. For example, most ENFPs (with dominant Ne) I know would identify with this statement. Most INFPs (with dominant Fi) I know would not.

    Ne is so profoundly different from the way most people think. I think a lot of dominant intuitives feel different to the point that they might consider if something is "wrong" with them.

    So as an ENFP, I do indeed crave to be understood and to be able to share my thoughts with other people who "get it." By this I mean they see the world in similar ways that I do. This is usually people with dominant or auxillary N.
    INTP’s have dom-Ti and aux-Ne. And in my case (if you’ve been paying attention to my sig you might have noticed this already) my Ti and Ne are about the same. In fact, my Ne marginally overrides my Ti. Which makes me think that the desire to be understood might not be a Ne thing, because I don’t really give a damn as to whether others understand me or not.

    What’s funny, however, is that even though I honestly think that I’m a very easy person to read others often find that I am “impossible to read” (some of my friends literally said that to me – including this one friend whom I’ve known since I was in 1st grade!). Maybe that has to do with my Ne?
    Enneagram: 5w4 5-9-2 (5w4 9w1 2w1) sp/so

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    The worst mistake people make in political arguments is assuming that the other side is not trying to do the right thing. This simple oversight makes productive conversation nearly impossible.

  6. #46
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    It's hard to know which thought you believe in when Ne spouts so many of them at one time... this gives the impression of hard to read, me thinks.

  7. #47
    Uniqueorn William K's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ratsimoan View Post
    I feel exactly the same. I crave for someone to understand me, too. It's good to know I'm not the only one. I didn't know wanted to be understood is Ne thing, I thought it was because of my enneagram ( type 4).
    Yeah, I agree with the enneagram 4. To me, being understood means that the other person recognizes that I have a right to my views. He might not agree with what I say but he respects that everyone is a different individual with their own perspective of the world.
    4w5, Fi>Ne>Ti>Si>Ni>Fe>Te>Se, sp > so > sx

    appreciates being appreciated, conflicted over conflicts, afraid of being afraid, bad at being bad, predictably unpredictable, consistently inconsistent, remarkably unremarkable...

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    The whole problem with the world is that fools & fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts. ~ Bertrand Russell

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