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  1. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by fecaleagle View Post
    I was saying things I couldn't even control and I knew I didn't mean them when I was saying them but I just felt really really hurt. My words were harsh, yes, and I did not mean any of what I said, I guess I was in protective mode. Anyways, I ended up overreacting and "breaking up" with her. I woke up the next morning regretting the "decision", but tried to hide my regret because of pride. Basically I said we should break up just to hurt her, and apologized, but she says that it was still a breakup because she was heartbroken for a day. Even though I had no intentions on breaking up I was just being an idiot, and have expressed that to her.
    ...
    I am very emotional right now, and super hurt because a smart girl is about to make a dumb decision because she is emotionally overwhelmed, and time doesn't seem to be helping. It's only causing her to dwell on her fabricated versions of such events
    Quote Originally Posted by fecaleagle View Post
    Especially given what I've read about ENFPs making ridiculously bad judgment calls a lot of times. That sounds like something an INTJ would say (which would even be considered as coming off as cocky by our own standards lol), and I would trust a decision like that more with an INTJ over an ENFP, all else held equal. I just really believe that thinking is more likely to arrive at the correct decision than feeling, so hopefully she will implement her Te function, which I am glad has been developing as we have dated
    what

  2. #52
    Senior Member fecaleagle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lady X View Post
    whoa did you really just call him self righteous and then go on to belittle the way an enfp processes information while saying how much better your approach is and laughing about it like it was cute for anyone to assume otherwise???
    Let us assume that the tables were turned. That I was her and she was me. Since my INTJ process in this situation would allow me to arrive at the conclusion that she really does love me (because it would be true since I do love her, in every sense of the word), and if the ENFP process fails, then yes my approach is much better because two people who love eachother end up together. Now if she does make the "right" conclusion, then her ENFP method is indeed valid, but not as efficient since it is more painful for both parties. Nowhere in my posts did I belittle how an ENFP processes information. Just saying how I don't think it is correct how this ENFP is analyzing this precise situation. How can I adore an ENFP yet not like how she processes information. That is like the most important thing in our compatibility. Am my "hehe" was in regard to how messy feelings can be.

  3. #53
    Post-Humorously stalemate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fecaleagle View Post
    Let us assume that the tables were turned. That I was her and she was me. Since my INTJ process in this situation would allow me to arrive at the conclusion that she really does love me (because it would be true since I do love her, in every sense of the word), and if the ENFP process fails, then yes my approach is much better because two people who love eachother end up together. Now if she does make the "right" conclusion, then her ENFP method is indeed valid, but not as efficient since it is more painful for both parties. Nowhere in my posts did I belittle how an ENFP processes information. Just saying how I don't think it is correct how this ENFP is analyzing this precise situation. How can I adore an ENFP yet not like how she processes information. That is like the most important thing in our compatibility. Am my "hehe" was in regard to how messy feelings can be.
    Being right isn't going to gain you anything here.

  4. #54
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fecaleagle View Post
    Let us assume that the tables were turned. That I was her and she was me. Since my INTJ process in this situation would allow me to arrive at the conclusion that she really does love me (because it would be true since I do love her, in every sense of the word), and if the ENFP process fails, then yes my approach is much better because two people who love eachother end up together. Now if she does make the "right" conclusion, then her ENFP method is indeed valid, but not as efficient since it is more painful for both parties. Nowhere in my posts did I belittle how an ENFP processes information. Just saying how I don't think it is correct how this ENFP is analyzing this precise situation. How can I adore an ENFP yet not like how she processes information. That is like the most important thing in our compatibility. Am my "hehe" was in regard to how messy feelings can be.
    let me explain something to you that you may not be programed to grasp...but saying you love someone means nothing if they do not feel loved by you. it doesn't mean it isn't true... it does not mean her way of processing is failing her. it means it is insignificant if it can't not be felt in the way she needs.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  5. #55
    Senior Member fecaleagle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by stalemate View Post
    Being right isn't going to gain you anything here.
    Well I agree because in the end all I want is for us to be together and happy again. I have spoken my heart without trying to tell her what to think, and told her she can have her time and I'll wait because she is so important to me. The only thing I do regret is initially trying to share my logic and facts of the situation, I hope I didn't make it seem as if I was discounting her emotions or trying to manipulate her with logic, but I don't think it came off as that way because I was very genuine. I stopped with the logical arguments when we talked after I read this thread and how it could be perceived as bad, so thanks for the insight But at the same time, if it doesn't work out, then I know that I should we weary in being in a relationship with an ENFP since I know that their process is capable of drawing an incorrect decision of such magntitude (that I don't love her).

  6. #56
    Filthy Apes! Kalach's Avatar
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    If the NFP posts in this thread are an indication, then NFPs tend to keep themselves secret. All those posts included some kind of rule that NFPs have deep inner stuff that other people can trip over which lets the NFP recoil, blah blah blah. In other words, stuff they don't say until too late. Which sounds like a weird relationship. So either they're talking about what happens at the beginning of relationships, or they're talking about built in fail points for any relationship.

    Ergo....


    something happened earlier--that eight month ago thing--and the ENFP in question has been waiting, looking for confirmation of some righteous pattern.



    This hypothesis brought to you by partial information, shallow analysis, and internet authority syndrome.
    Bellison uncorked a flood of horrible profanity, which, translated, meant, "This is extremely unusual."

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  7. #57
    Senior Member fecaleagle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lady X View Post
    let me explain something to you that you may not be programed to grasp...but saying you love someone means nothing if they do not feel loved by you. it doesn't mean it isn't true... it does not mean her way of processing is failing her. it means it is insignificant if it can't not be felt in the way she needs.
    Explain to me how one night of words can make someone feel like you were not loved, after all hightened emotions settle down. Especially if all actions and time together before hand did make her feel loved. During this whole process I have tried to show her that I love her, not really just saying it. In fact, I was not one to say "I love you" in the relationship much, I just tried to show it via my actions and it was working.

  8. #58
    Retired Member Wonkavision's Avatar
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    Jesus Christ.

    I just read through the whole thread.


    Fecal, your whole approach to the situation is completely insane.

    I don't even know where to begin.....and I doubt it will do any good.


    Basically, at this point, I can't believe you are serious.

    Something tells me that you are a troll and eventually you're going to reveal that this thread is a big joke.

    I hope.

    Otherwise, I think you need serious help.
    __________________


    I'M OUTTA HERE.

    IT'S BEEN FUN.

    TAKE CARE.

    PEACE OUT!!!


  9. #59
    Post-Humorously stalemate's Avatar
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    Let's approach this from a different angle. In your opinion, is she above or below the Vicki Mendoza diagonal?


  10. #60
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    listen...i have no idea how your girl feels...i'm simply saying that one has to genuinely feel loved and respected and be able to trust her emotional self with you...she has to feel it...if this night changed that for her. then it did...i'm not saying it did but it is not just a simple matter of logic.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

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