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  1. #291
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    Yeah!... wait *looks around* I see you all staring at us with your emotion filled eyes, but you can't take us all down! *looks back*... guys? S**t. *Runs away*.

  2. #292
    Senior Member fecaleagle's Avatar
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    Just an update...Somehow I've pretty much moved on completely...that was fast and seemingly impossible. What gives? I thought it takes tons of time to heal these things? Could it be because I was betrayed and lost all respect for my ex, making the process a breeze? I actually kind of feel good, like I dodged a bullet. I look forward to finding a better girl soon, like a challenge of some sort. The other night I burned all of our pictures and felt no emotional response when looking at them...it was almost like I was looking at a picture of myself and a stranger, so so weird. The only thing that I felt was confusion..not emotional confusion but the need to know why things turned out the way they did. It's even harder to figure it out since in the grand scheme of things and during this stressful period, I did everything right. I don't mind one bit having her out of my life because time has really put a perspective of who she was throughout our relationship and how blind I was, but I guess I'm just frustrated by the lack of honesty as to how exactly this all happened and why. I have to accept that it's just one of those things that I'll never know. People tell me it doesn't matter, so I've been trying to listen but sometimes I just can't turn off my analyzing brain. Just rambling I guess, which is something I don't do. I guess this whole situation plus my interaction on this forum has really made me locate and pinpoint my Fi and I feel like I'm well on my way to developing it as best as a tertiary function can be developed. I bet this sounds strange to ENFPs, just thought I'd share and get your input! I'm determined to figure out the ENFP and end up in a relationship with one (a good one this time)
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  3. #293
    Junior Member ludius's Avatar
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    I can't believe I read this whole thread in a single sitting. It's like watching a love story movie. I'm 27 and I've never been in a relationship that's why reading something like this that involves ENFP and INTJ is so much interesting.

    Note: I can't believe it too that I even registered to this forum just to post this message. LOL!

    EDIT: @fecaleagle, Here's the final and the most (or only) useful advice that you have to get from this thread: Why not try another enfp? This time, a *gay* enfp

  4. #294
    Senior Member Ratsimoan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fecaleagle View Post
    Just an update...Somehow I've pretty much moved on completely...that was fast and seemingly impossible. What gives? I thought it takes tons of time to heal these things? Could it be because I was betrayed and lost all respect for my ex, making the process a breeze? I actually kind of feel good, like I dodged a bullet. I look forward to finding a better girl soon, like a challenge of some sort. The other night I burned all of our pictures and felt no emotional response when looking at them...it was almost like I was looking at a picture of myself and a stranger, so so weird. The only thing that I felt was confusion..not emotional confusion but the need to know why things turned out the way they did. It's even harder to figure it out since in the grand scheme of things and during this stressful period, I did everything right. I don't mind one bit having her out of my life because time has really put a perspective of who she was throughout our relationship and how blind I was, but I guess I'm just frustrated by the lack of honesty as to how exactly this all happened and why. I have to accept that it's just one of those things that I'll never know. People tell me it doesn't matter, so I've been trying to listen but sometimes I just can't turn off my analyzing brain. Just rambling I guess, which is something I don't do. I guess this whole situation plus my interaction on this forum has really made me locate and pinpoint my Fi and I feel like I'm well on my way to developing it as best as a tertiary function can be developed. I bet this sounds strange to ENFPs, just thought I'd share and get your input! I'm determined to figure out the ENFP and end up in a relationship with one (a good one this time)
    I'm glad you moved on. I'm, also, glad you didn't count enfps out. Yeah, look for a more healthy enfp-who's ready to be in an open honest relationship. But don't worry about personality type because you might find happiness in another personality type.
    [SIGPIC] [/SIGPIC]

    Death must be so beautiful. To lie in the soft brown earth, with the grasses waving above one's head, and listen to silence. To have no yesterday, and no to-morrow. To forget time, to forgive life, to be at peace."
    — Sylvia Plath (The Bell Jar)

    "Remember, remember, this is now, and now, and now. Live it, feel it, cling to it. I want to become acutely aware of all I’ve taken for granted."
    — Sylvia Plath

  5. #295
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    Quote Originally Posted by fecaleagle View Post
    Basically I said we should break up just to hurt her, and apologized, but she says that it was still a breakup because she was heartbroken for a day. Even though I had no intentions on breaking up I was just being an idiot, and have expressed that to her. Anyways, I told her how much she means to me and that what I said were simply words, without of my true emotions attached. Since then, she has been acting super cold to me. She says we are taking a break, and that she wants to work on getting back together, but her actions says otherwise, like we are breaking up but she needs to be 100% sure or something. Then, all the sudden she claims that she doesn't think that I think she is the girl for me and that we should break up. It really seems like she is being super vindictive for no reason, and hurting my feelings much more than I could have hurt hers, since she has been doing this for 2 weeks. I've agreed that I will communicate more and force myself not to overreact in these rare times. I've even expressed how I want to spend the rest of my life with her because we are perfect for eachother, but it seems like she doesn't believe me or something! Or thinks that I do not know what I want. Ha, an INTJ not knowing what they want? I feel like she thinks that I'm trying to trick her or something, which would make NO sense for an INTJ to do! If I wasn't 100% sure I wanted to fight any obstacle for us to be together because I know I've found my soulmate, I wouldn't even be trying right now. My default mode, naturally, is single-mode, and I know that being in a relationship hasn't changed that. So the fact that I'm still in it should say everything. However, I have truly reached my breaking point. I don't hold any negative feelings for her, but I can't help but feel that her love for me was never or will never be as strong as mine was for her, and am struggling to understand how she can stand to see me suffer past a point of justice.
    As an ENFP, I don't believe she's trying to make you suffer, or giving any form of revenge. When words hurt, they tend to resurface in our minds over and over again. I know, because I remember every single painful word my ex told me 2 years ago, also remembering where I was at the time and what I was doing. I don't know if she remembers what you said exactly, but it must still affect her the same way.

    You must know that ENFPs tend to withdraw themselves from most types of conflict right? Well, she has probably givin in to her own fight against fear. She's afraid of getting hurt again, and it will probably take her a good while to get over it. I think the best chance you would've had of getting her back is by slowly starting over again: be her friend and show her you're there for her.

  6. #296
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    Quote Originally Posted by Neko Meika View Post
    As an ENFP, I don't believe she's trying to make you suffer, or giving any form of revenge. When words hurt, they tend to resurface in our minds over and over again. I know, because I remember every single painful word my ex told me 2 years ago, also remembering where I was at the time and what I was doing. I don't know if she remembers what you said exactly, but it must still affect her the same way.

    You must know that ENFPs tend to withdraw themselves from most types of conflict right? Well, she has probably givin in to her own fight against fear. She's afraid of getting hurt again, and it will probably take her a good while to get over it. I think the best chance you would've had of getting her back is by slowly starting over again: be her friend and show her you're there for her.
    I guess closure after 6 or so years of being confused is a good thing...
    Im out, its been fun

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