fecaleagle (hahaha i just actually realized your user handle, gross), i think what is happening here is that there is a way that you are speaking that is very differently interpreted by us Feelers. anyone feel free to correct me if i'm wrong or misinterpreting your issue with the way he posts.
you guys tend to value efficiency in your speaking. I've noticed that the INTJs i know tend to be very choosy with their words, often taking a lot of time to think through what they're thinking in order to articulate their own thought process in the most efficient way possible (Ti).
Well, this can be very true for ENFPs too. we can spend a lot of time carefully choosing words, not so much to articulate what we are thinking, but what we are FEELING, and sometimes we invest a lot of energy trying to articulate these things in a way that is sensitive to the person we are talking to. I know that i've made a couple posts where i've had to re-write things because i thought "wow, maybe this was a little harsh, this guy is just trying to understand, i should try to soften this up a little bit".
the reason i (and maybe others) see a lot of pride in your posts is because you are dealing with this issue on a very intellectual level from your intellectual perspective. which is cool, you have a lot to offer through that. it's very much needed in these kinds of situations. JUST NOT RIGHT NOW. if i were this ENFP, the way i would start to let my guard down again is if i saw that you were trying your best to deal with this issue on an emotional level and maybe then follow up by dealing with it intellectually. Try to put yourself in her shoes. Try and actually feel what you think she might be feeling based on the situation and her reactions. You are on step 2 and trying to move on, while she is still on step 1 and feeling pretty bad. That's why it might come off to a lot of us as "why won't she just move on and forgive me? can't she see MY good intentions?" because you're kinda coming from your perspective of being on step 2. if that makes any sense, lol.
You have very good points, and there's always two sides to a story, but when someone is hurt it's harder to see their side. We already know why you did what you did (and she probably does too), so when you keep explaining yourself and your thought process like you are in your posts, it can come across as making excuses. The words you choose still indicate to me that you are approaching this from your intellectual perspective and, therefore, your perspective. I think if you try your best to get yourself into her emotional perspective as best you can, this will come out in your posts.
i hope this makes sense
THIS THIS THIS THIS