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View Poll Results: NF women - do you want children?

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  • I'm ENFJ - I want/have children

    1 1.05%
  • I'm ENFJ - I do NOT want children

    3 3.16%
  • I'm INFJ - I want/have children

    23 24.21%
  • I'm INFJ - I do NOT want children

    5 5.26%
  • I'm ENFP - I want/have children

    11 11.58%
  • I'm ENFP - I do NOT want children

    4 4.21%
  • I'm INFP - I want/have children

    15 15.79%
  • I'm INFP - I do NOT want children

    8 8.42%
  • I'm not NF

    6 6.32%
  • I'm not a female

    12 12.63%
  • I don't know yet or any other answer that's not in the poll

    7 7.37%
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Thread: NF women, do you want kids?

  1. #31
    4x9 Array cascadeco's Avatar
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    Oct 2007
    4 so/sp


    Well... seeing as I can't relate at all to those who have said they've always wanted kids or 'wanted 5', even at a young age (not that there's anything wrong with that, I just really cannot relate), the most accurate answer out of the two would be 'INFJ and don't want kids'.

    In recent years I've been open to the idea of having one, if I met the right person, but even if I did meet the 'right person' I might end up deciding it's something I'm not wanting. Totally ambivalent about it, leaning towards the 'no', I guess. Only thing pushing me towards 'yes' would be worrying I'd be missing out on a really amazing aspect of life.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  2. #32
    The Duchess of Oddity Array Queen Kat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009


    I'm 18 now and I'm going to college in a few months, so this wouldn't be the perfect time to get children for me. But once I finished college, I'd definately want them. There is no particular reason behind it, I just feel like they'd bring a good amount of happiness in my life. And by the way, I'm the only person in my family who is really sane. It would be such a pity to just throw away this awesome DNA of mine. Being a single mother wouldn't be that much of a nightmare, I think. When I was little, my parents didn't have any work and I spent most of my time alone. I don't even have one old memory left of my father from when I was younger than 8, except those times he yelled at my mom or at me. And after a poor early childhood and all this loneliness in my early years I still turned out to be a pretty cool person. I can't even remember any moment when I felt unhappy (except when we celebrated Sinterklaas at my grandma's place and all of my cousins got all these cool and toys and I just got lousy and cheep ones). Being a single mother wouldn't really block your children's way to happiness.
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  3. #33
    Member Array Talisyn's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010


    Quote Originally Posted by 21% View Post

    But then again, someone told me that no one ever feels they are "ready" for children, then it happens, you panic, and then you realize "Hey, I can do this after all!"
    True enough. I'm a do, but I wonder how objective that is considering I have 2 children and love them more than life. I never wanted an immense brood, but I think I've always wanted kids- at some point. I did have young parents and it was a +++ with how we relate to one another, energy level, etc compared to my friends with parents who had them past 30. However, if I hadn't met my husband at a younger age... and thus been single longer I think it would have been longer before I had kids, and I don't think that would have bothered me too much either. I really can't say.
    I want to be alive To all the life that is in me now, to know each moment to the uttermost.
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  4. #34
    Professional Trickster Array Esoteric Wench's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009


    Quote Originally Posted by ajblaise View Post
    NFs do want kids.... they just want them 10 years later than an ESFJ wants kids.
    I laughed so hard when I read this that I almost dropped my soda out of my hand. Fantastic. And, so true.

  5. #35
    Peaced Array Quay's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    6w5 sp/sx
    EII Ni


    Quote Originally Posted by HollyGolightly View Post
    I just think what I feel is so much stronger than that...I'm more than prepared to take the rough with the smooth. I don't think I would ever be able to say that my life felt meaningless or empty...and feeling will be so worth all the "not so fun stuff" that would come with being a parent.
    so true...
    Quote Originally Posted by marmalade.sunrise View Post
    hmmm...I knew when I was 17 that I wouldn't have kids until I was at least 30.
    We'll see what happens. Talk to me in ten years.
    I felt this way at 17 too. I was adamant about not having kids for at least another 10 years, and was 28 when my two were born, and I think I'm finished. Really.

    Quote Originally Posted by ElizaJane View Post
    But then are people just satisfying some need in themselves by having children? Would it be selfish to bring them into the world? (These questions were much more bothersome years ago when I considered myself agnostic though.)

    I just wonder if everyone goes through this or if people just pop out kids because that's what people do... without really thinking much about it. I'm pretty sure my sisters didn't think about it much.
    I believe the feeling is innate.

    I tend to think of my children as one of the few things I've done right my entire time on this planet.

    And I agree with popping out the kids thing too. I despise that and it seems most women I know are guilty of it. And the kids suffer and I hate watching it....wish I could steal all of those kids and go live on a ranch somewhere...

  6. #36
    Iron Maiden Array fidelia's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    1w2 so/sx


    I always thought I'd have kids. If I had been charting out my ideal life, I would have said I'd like four.

    As time has gone on though, I've realized what a huge responsibility having kids is and also how much the world has changed in a very short time. Even if I were to be up for the challenge, I don't know of anyone that has the qualities I would even want to start a marriage with. I am not interested in having kids unless I could provide them with two stable parents. At 33, I would be surprised if I ever met someone I did wish to marry, so I doubt I'll ever have kids. If I did, I wouldn't want to be having them in my 40s.

  7. #37
    Senior Member Array
    Join Date
    Apr 2010


    Right now, I know I'm definantly not ready for it. But, one or two children in the future would be nice. Though, in my family it seems to be a tradition that you have to have one child for every year you've been married...Bleh...not my bag. I'm breaking that tradition. One kid, two tops. That's it.

  8. #38
    Senior Member Array HollyGolightly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    1w2 sp/so


    Just to add...I don't want children now, I'm only 18. But if I had to answer whether I wanted children or not I would say yes, definitely. I think I wouldreally regret it if I grew old and was looking back on my life...and I never got the chance to help create a life, love it and raise it. I would really feel that I had missed out.
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  9. #39
    From the Undertow Array CuriousFeeling's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    4w5 sp/sx


    I want to have a family when I have a husband, stable career and income, and a house. At this moment, I don't have any of the three criteria listed, and I feel that I'm a bit young to have them yet.


    “Thoughts are the shadows of our feelings -- always darker, emptier and simpler.”
    ― Friedrich Nietzsche

  10. #40
    movin melodies Array kiddykat's Avatar
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    Jul 2008
    4, 7


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