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  1. #1
    Member SinistralPal's Avatar
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    Default Contention: ENTP female + INFJ male

    So, there is a thread on here that basically goes on and on about how AWESOME AND AMAZING the ENTP + INFJ dynamic is. However, this thread seemed to be from a male ENTP perspective on INFJ females (and according to INTP posts on the thread, the love of INFJ women has been brought up by many ENTP males).

    So, my question is, does this "perfect" relationship dynamic still hold true for ENTP female + INFJ male?

    In my opinion, classic female and male roles in relationships in an ENTP female + INFJ male dynamic would be extremely skewed. An ENTx male is the stereotypic epitome of this classic "maleness" - he's logical, intelligent, he loud and dominant. He's the bread earner and the "master of his domain". And the INFx female? Again fits the stigma of this kind, nurturing, gentile soul. She is that proverbial damsel in distress waiting for her brave knight.

    Now look at ENTx women. Aggressive, dominant, analytical, cunning. Now, combine this with the nurturing INFJ romantic, and you've got yourself quite the male/female role-reversal so to speak. This, in my mind would almost epitomize the "modern" relationship of the woman more likely to fall into the "bread earner" role in family, and the male counterpart being more likely to play the role of "stay at home dad". Maybe this can work, but could it last? Or would the parties involved become too uncomfortable with these "roles"?

    Also, in my opinion, ENTx women vs ENTx men, tend to have a stronger developed Fe/Fi function, and seem to be very attuned to social expectations and dynamics, much in the same way an NF would. Therefore, would they feel comfortable with a man with also a high amount of NF? Or would they feel uneasy about "emotional overload"??

    Are ENTx women between a rock and a hard place, or can this type of relationship thrive??

    (Please do not be offended by any of my blatant stereotypes in this post. It was to serve a point by using hyperbole rather than be offensive.)
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  2. #2
    Queen hunter Virtual ghost's Avatar
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    You mentioned INTJs deliberatly in this post or that T is a typo ?

  3. #3
    Member SinistralPal's Avatar
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    Gah, thanks. xxxP = does not check over work. /facepalm. Edited now!
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  4. #4
    Queen hunter Virtual ghost's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SinistralPal View Post
    Gah, thanks. xxxP = does not check over work. /facepalm. Edited now!
    The reason why I came into this thread is because I have heard that ENT women have a number of problems when it comes to romance. So they are looking for someone that is pretty similar but someone that is low on "drama"
    since that makes them uncomfortable. Especially since they as women should comfort their SO most of the time.


    In other words long ago there was a thread which said that female ENTPs should be looking for INTJs.


    Just saying.

  5. #5
    Crazy Diamond Billy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SinistralPal View Post
    So, there is a thread on here that basically goes on and on about how AWESOME AND AMAZING the ENTP + INFJ dynamic is. However, this thread seemed to be from a male ENTP perspective on INFJ females (and according to INTP posts on the thread, the love of INFJ women has been brought up by many ENTP males).

    So, my question is, does this "perfect" relationship dynamic still hold true for ENTP female + INFJ male?

    In my opinion, classic female and male roles in relationships in an ENTP female + INFJ male dynamic would be extremely skewed. An ENTx male is the stereotypic epitome of this classic "maleness" - he's logical, intelligent, he loud and dominant. He's the bread earner and the "master of his domain". And the INFx female? Again fits the stigma of this kind, nurturing, gentile soul. She is that proverbial damsel in distress waiting for her brave knight.

    Now look at ENTx women. Aggressive, dominant, analytical, cunning. Now, combine this with the nurturing INFJ romantic, and you've got yourself quite the male/female role-reversal so to speak. This, in my mind would almost epitomize the "modern" relationship of the woman more likely to fall into the "bread earner" role in family, and the male counterpart being more likely to play the role of "stay at home dad". Maybe this can work, but could it last? Or would the parties involved become too uncomfortable with these "roles"?

    Also, in my opinion, ENTx women vs ENTx men, tend to have a stronger developed Fe/Fi function, and seem to be very attuned to social expectations and dynamics, much in the same way an NF would. Therefore, would they feel comfortable with a man with also a high amount of NF? Or would they feel uneasy about "emotional overload"??

    Are ENTx women between a rock and a hard place, or can this type of relationship thrive??

    (Please do not be offended by any of my blatant stereotypes in this post. It was to serve a point by using hyperbole rather than be offensive.)
    You are using female nurturing stereotypes on males... Why would a male INFJ stay home and let you work? INFJ males are natural networkers and do exceptionally well in society with people. Especially once they hit thier stride and get over their intial awkwardness and shyness in life. I am dating an ENTJ female right now and I make way more money then she does, we work well together because we both do our own thing and get together on the stuff that we share in common. Sex, horror movies/snuggling on the couch, dinner at cool new places etc.

    I would say it really depends on the male, I am a very nurturing person, but I would say I am more nurturing to peoples physical needs then their emotional needs because I like to be practical and logical. For my part in the relationships I have I would say I dont come off as nurturing so much as just really generous and emotionally available. I still retain my masculinity, even if I can get emotional about stuff at times. I am sure this is true of most INFJ males, especially since the nature of Ni kind of detaches us slightly fro reality, so we are a little cooler then people realize sometimes.
    Ground control to Major Tom

  6. #6
    Member SinistralPal's Avatar
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    In other words long ago there was a thread which said that female ENTPs should be looking for INTJs.
    *Moment of revelation* Ah-ha! INTJ's!!
    *Moment of apprehension* Ohh...all those ENFP's clamouring to get the limited INTJ supply.
    *Moment of revelation* Mass genocide...


    ...and so, deep into the night, SinistralPal works tirelessly drafting plans to put her ideas into action...
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  7. #7
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    and..the infj females i know are definitely not the damsel in distress type. they are very self sufficient competent people and will not need the "man" to do stuff for them.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  8. #8
    Member SinistralPal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lady X View Post
    and..the infj females i know are definitely not the damsel in distress type. they are very self sufficient competent people and will not need the "man" to do stuff for them.
    Please note my comment at the end of my post: (Please do not be offended by any of my blatant stereotypes in this post. It was to serve a point by using hyperbole rather than be offensive.)

    I actually know an INFJ female VERY well....my mother. In a way, yes, she is extremely self-sufficient, yet, she does need comfort and protection in her family dynamic. We do get along very well, but I am not sure if I could date/marry that type. However, that being said, I have very limited experience with INFJ males...
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  9. #9
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    oh sure not in the least offended. i was just saying that isn't quite the dynamic as i see it. i would see the entp guy being more dependent on the infj then the other way around...just loosely based on my infj mother and enfp dad
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  10. #10
    Member SinistralPal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Billy View Post
    You are using female nurturing stereotypes on males... Why would a male INFJ stay home and let you work? INFJ males are natural networkers and do exceptionally well in society with people. Especially once they hit thier stride and get over their intial awkwardness and shyness in life. I am dating an ENTJ female right now and I make way more money then she does, we work well together because we both do our own thing and get together on the stuff that we share in common. Sex, horror movies/snuggling on the couch, dinner at cool new places etc.

    I would say it really depends on the male, I am a very nurturing person, but I would say I am more nurturing to peoples physical needs then their emotional needs because I like to be practical and logical. For my part in the relationships I have I would say I dont come off as nurturing so much as just really generous and emotionally available. I still retain my masculinity, even if I can get emotional about stuff at times. I am sure this is true of most INFJ males, especially since the nature of Ni kind of detaches us slightly fro reality, so we are a little cooler then people realize sometimes.
    It is true, I fell into the same faux pas I was criticising. Mia colpa. As mentioned in my earlier post on this thread is that I have experience with my own INFJ mother, and limited experience with INFJ males. I would say that my mom is self-sufficient, and I would say pulls in a higher salary than my dad. However, she can be...emotionally demanding at times. I heard this from other NF males - they require a lot of attention and affirmation in the relationship. One friend of mine sited this as the reason for his divorce.

    Interesting comments though Billy. Have you found any of these sorts of problems in your relationship? How do you feel you and your SO handle arguments and emotional stresses? You mentioned you are more "emotionally available" - to me this implies more "receiving". Do you find your ENTJ tends to instigate emotional conversations more then?
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