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  1. #31
    mrs disregard's Avatar
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    I love to socialise, I just don't get "involved" with most people.

  2. #32
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by disregard View Post
    Yeah, I'll never know for sure if it's nature or nurture, but I think it's nature due to coming from a long line of loners.
    Yeah, who knows.. if you're from a long line of loners, then their nurturing method would be very loner-ish as well!! haha.

    My family is the same. Both of my parents are insanely introverted (my dad moreso than my mom - he hardly speaks, and I know very little about him), as is my brother. No one really knew anything about each others inner lives growing up. I'm probably the most extroverted of the bunch, which doesn't say a whole lot.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  3. #33
    Professional Trickster Esoteric Wench's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by disregard View Post
    See, what you really mean EW, is that you would be screwed if your closest friend got hit by a bus, because you aren't as independent as I am. Not an insult, that's just how you are.
    Ahhh, disregard. Let me share with you a couple of observations:

    I feel like I really got under your skin with my previous post. That certainly wasn't my intention, but since you have made FIVE separate responses to my one passing comment, it's hard for me to not think that I hit upon a nerve. Once again, that was not my intention.

    Now as to the nerve I presumably touched upon when I asked you if you weren't like all human beings in that you, too, needed friends:

    First of all, I'm a fiercely independent person who needs no one else to define her. It may have taken me 35 years to get there, but I am completely comfortable in my own skin and am a self-contained juggernaut of coolness. So my motivations for making this comment have nothing to do with me being extraverted or an ENFP or anything else except for my life experience.

    I feel like I've learned from the school of hard knocks that we all need people. This includes you, too.

    Once again, our need for people has nothing to do with being introverted or extraverted. It has to do with HUMILITY. It has to do with living long enough and having enough crap happen to you that you realize that no one can do it alone. And, that everyone needs more than one person in their support network.

    I completely accept that you don't feel like you need any other friends. But this is not what I take issue with.

    I argue that regardless of your inherent desire to have lots of friends or one friend, you need to have more than one close friend. Again, this isn't because I think you're secretly pining away for more friends but afraid to tell anyone. It's just that limiting oneself to a single close friend seems like a short-sited strategy to succeeding in life... it is not a well-balanced, pro-active approach to facing life's obstacles.

    However great your baby is, he has his bad days. He has his weaknesses. He may become embroiled in his own issues that will take up all his time. He is encumbered by his own biases. He may get hit by a bus.

    I'm not casting aspersions on your baby. I'm just stating that all human being have their foibles and their circumstances that they can't control.

    You need more than one friend NOT for the obstacles you anticipate. You need more than one friend for the obstacles you DON'T anticipate. Because sometimes the load is too heavy for only two backs to bear.

    That is all I meant to say. And I tell you this not as my opinion, but as a universal truth based upon my experience.

  4. #34
    mrs disregard's Avatar
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    EW, I can't stomach unsolicited advice.

    I don't dislike you, I just bristle when I hear it. Especially when age is mentioned.

    You don't know what I've been through and I wouldn't presume to know what you've been through, so mind your own business.

  5. #35
    mrs disregard's Avatar
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    I mean, what prompted you to tell me how to live my life? Was I lamenting my lack of inner-circle friends? No, I was not.

    My personal life is just the way I want it, yet here you are telling me I'm doing things wrong and will inevitably regret it.

  6. #36
    Senior Member The Outsider's Avatar
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    I hate to say it, but it wouldn't really matter to me if I suddenly lost all my friends. I would be sad of course, as it's a natural emotional response, but in no way do I depend on my friends.

  7. #37
    Senior Member The Outsider's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Esoteric Wench View Post
    universal truth based upon my experience.
    Lol.

  8. #38
    Post-Humorously stalemate's Avatar
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    I have just a few close friends and a ton of more shallow relationships like what was described in the OP.

  9. #39
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by disregard View Post
    I mean, what prompted you to tell me how to live my life? Was I lamenting my lack of inner-circle friends? No, I was not.

    My personal life is just the way I want it, yet here you are telling me I'm doing things wrong and will inevitably regret it.
    Long did I live before I accepted and cherished advice from those wiser than I. You too can use some advice. Take it from a 25 year old.

    (Totally kidding! I hate that, too. Very belittling!)
    06/13 10:51:03 five sounds: you!!!
    06/13 10:51:08 shortnsweet: no you!!
    06/13 10:51:12 shortnsweet: go do your things and my things too!
    06/13 10:51:23 five sounds: oh hell naw
    06/13 10:51:55 shortnsweet: !!!!
    06/13 10:51:57 shortnsweet: (cries)
    06/13 10:52:19 RiftsWRX: You two are like furbies stuck in a shoe box

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  10. #40

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    Quote Originally Posted by shortnsweet View Post
    Long did I live before I accepted and cherished advice from those wiser than I. You too can use some advice. Take it from a 25 year old.

    (Totally kidding! I hate that, too. Very belittling!)
    You guys sound over sensitive... wait... feelers!!

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