Self-improvement is one of the main focuses for people of the NF temperament. In ENFJs, this is curtailed to self-actualization. Telling someone that 'who they are is the problem' is an egregious offense to an ENFJ.
You are not just your type.
Besides you let others have that power over you? You know what I'd say to someone who would tell me "you're doomed" ? I'd laugh at them.
I think what LadyJaye meant to imply was that being a Fe-dominant man is obviously very different and probably "harder" than being a Fe-dominant woman in our society. She's probably right too. Doesn't render self-actualization impossible.
It's great once you get past all the fake shit though and everyone's cards are on the table so to speak.
Glad I am not the only one! I hate fake stuff. That is why I always like to encourage people to come to my parties... I only ever invite real people. Everyone always comments how much they enjoy meeting real and nice people.