Every time I go to family reunions, or I meet old (or new) acquaintances or when I speak to strangers and I tell them about my life, they always tell my I fucked up my teenage years and therefore also the rest of my life. Why have I fucked it up?
- I've been in a fight with almost everyone I've met the last 6 years, because I was just trying to be honest and stay myself.
- My love life is totally fucked up and I'm attracting the wrong kind of men.
- I've continued a hobby that I've already had since I was 6 (writing), which made my peers hate me because sometimes I found it more important than homework.
- I don't get drunk every weekend, because alcohol makes me feel like I'm locked inside my head.
- I've never learnt to see what's so arousing about vomitting.
- I've never learnt to appreciate Uggs and skinny jeans.
- I've never learnt to resist ditching friends if I got tired and because of this I stood in the way of my own popularity.
In fact, I don't mind all of these things. I even like these things about myself. Then why am I posting this? BECAUSE ALL THE PEOPLE WHO TRY TO MAKE ME BELIEVE ALL THESE THINGS ARE A HUGE PROBLEM ARE ANNORYING THE HELL OUT OF ME! AAAAARGH!!!
Old friends and acquaintances.
Strangers who I have a talk with.
Almost everyone I speak seems to have a problem with the way my life went. They tell me that I should change my life before it's too late, because otherwhise I won't be able to get babies anymore. And I'm only 18! WTF?! So, appearantly this is what I'm supposed to do:
- Be normal.
- Collect friends and have shallow friendships with them.
- Get drunk.
- Vommit and be happy with it because it's normal.
- Have these shallow friends pick out a decent, boring boyfriend for me.
- Get married.
- Get babies. Two babies, to be exact.
- Get myself a nice office job and pretend it's what I've always wanted to do.
- Work until I'm 67.
- Retire and go hiking with fake teeth and kaki bermudas.
That's fucking boring! Dude! That's not what I want to do with my life! But why do I take all of this so personally? I don't want to take it personally, but I can't help it. I do feel offended, because this way it seems like I'm some kind of lame robot. Now I wonder:
How on earth can I make sure that I don't take these boring expectations too personally? If I take it personallly, everybody thinks I do care and then they try to help me! HEEEEELP!!! :eek::horor: