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  1. #31
    Professional Trickster Esoteric Wench's Avatar
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    I adore my ISTP (aka my Socionics dual) boyfriend. He is undoubtedly and unequivocally awesome. That being said, I sooooo still daydream about finding a healthy and heterosexual INFJ male to connect with. Damn it. I've got better odds being gay.

    OK... this ENFP just bitch-slapped herself. My dual is amazing. I'm soooo lucky to have him. However,without contradicting guidance, I must tell you that I prefer to date INFJs and INTjs. And over 50% of my serious relationships have been with either of these very rare personality types. We just seem to have this effortless communications.

    - Esoteric Wench

  2. #32
    Junior Member The Curator's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ratsimoan View Post
    I love you guys . You're just misunderstood. I must admit that sometimes, my infj's friend gets on my nerve, nevertheless, he's still a beautiful person with a lot a lot of potential. I really really would like to date a healthy infj.
    The difference between the healthy and unhealthy INFJs is so large, I had a run in with a very unhealthy female INFJ and it was not a good experience, at all. She was so easily hurt by every single thing and manipulated peoples emotions so much, including mine for a time.
    "It is an easy thing to find a man who often, opens his mouth but rarely says anything. It is a difficult thing to find a man who rarely speaks but says volumes" - Unknown Author

    "A coward is incapable of exhibiting love; it is the prerogative of the brave."
    - Mohandas Gandhi

    "Human Salvation lies in the hands of the creatively Maladjusted" - Martin Luther King Jr.

  3. #33
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    I think ethnicity is also a large factor to consider for male INFJs. I think that, as a black male INFJ, there's a whole other level of societal role instilled within us. Not only are we males, and have to play out the typical gender stereotypes, but black culture generally looks down upon those who are seen as "weak" or "sensitive". I perceive this expection from many people, both black and not. Over the years I've built up a pretty thick T outer shell, only showing my true feelings to those I feel comfortable enough around to, usually ENFJs. But even then, not completely.

    I think there needs to be more discourse of MBTI and how it applies to different ethnic backgrounds here.

  4. #34
    Senior Member quietmusician's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Obstinate View Post
    I think ethnicity is also a large factor to consider for male INFJs. I think that, as a black male INFJ, there's a whole other level of societal role instilled within us. Not only are we males, and have to play out the typical gender stereotypes, but black culture generally looks down upon those who are seen as "weak" or "sensitive". I perceive this expection from many people, both black and not. Over the years I've built up a pretty thick T outer shell, only showing my true feelings to those I feel comfortable enough around to, usually ENFJs. But even then, not completely.

    I think there needs to be more discourse of MBTI and how it applies to different ethnic backgrounds here.
    Yes, exactly. I'm a black male INFJ and I am highly aware of the fact that (judging from what I see on TV) I "need" to be something I'm not. Luckily, I don't live in an urban area because I would imagine things would be 10x more difficult for me. Growing up was hard and the xSTP coat I'd wear has worn thin as the years went by. Still, the images projected from black culture in the media do not mirror my own. And I can't relate to any of that. So thank you for bringing this up as this is very true.

  5. #35
    Badoom~ Skyward's Avatar
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    I find that I idolize or demonize ESTPs fairly quickly, but I know I don't have the energy or mind-structure to do what they do without burning out. I see all their projects and think: 'I could do with some more industry.' I just prefer to think about being industrious rather than BE industrious (but sometimes I start to steamroll at 2 in the morning when I can't sleep)


    I've learned about how odd I am compared to the 'normal folks' (I.E. the people who don't seem to go through any identity crisis because it's so easy for them to follow their friends, family, or work). I tend to find the other odd folks (SPs and Ns mostly with a couple of SJs) and make a close knit group of outsiders who could care less about the Crowd. It doesn't mean I can't interact with those people, it just takes effort for me to not alienate them with my odd thinking style. Also I am painfully unaware of many social norms, which helps them think I'm either weird or dumb
    'Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and its better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.' - Marilyn Monroe

    This is who I am, escapist, paradise-seeker.
    -Nightwish

    Anthropology Major out of Hamline University. St. Paul, Minnesota.

  6. #36
    Member Srho's Avatar
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    Male ENFJs are significantly less "emo" and more confident than male INFJs, though, which is a huge bonus. If only I could develop a shell of extraversion. Anyway, yes, I get frustrated with social norms, which makes my Fe very unhealthy. Also, I am white...

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