User Tag List

Results 1 to 9 of 9

  1. #1
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    4,226

    Default Fi: Internal vs external affirmation?

    Hi guys-

    this is a weird question so I am not sure I will phrase it quite the right way so please feel free to correct or redefine.

    Many ENFPs I have ever met have a tendency to seek external affirmation and feedback. This intuitively makes sense for me-I tell you how I feel about an issue, you mirror that, and feel the same way, thus I know what I felt was "okay" or maybe "not okay". Maybe I over reacted or under reacted, I dunno. Sometimes it really is just plucking the Fi connectivities as well-"Is this person still my friend?" I have tried to recognize this as I have aged.

    Since Fi is internal, I assume we are using our external emotional response to a situation to build/prune the Fi rules-the branches of our Fi value systems maybe? But since we are extroverted we will do this partially externalized since we have to "think on our feet"?


    So do other enfps do this same thing? Does this^^ or parts of it sound familiar?

    How do INFPs validate that they are feeling the "right" thing in response to an issue? How do you know if your value or subsequent emotive response being analyzed by Fi is correct since you are introverted? What do you compare it against?

    (This may make no sense at all....)

  2. #2
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/so
    Posts
    18,086

    Default

    makes perfect sense. there are quite a few issues that i've thought enough about that i'm very clear on but there are others that are new and i might occasionally process them out loud making statements or questions in an exploratory way as i define them...bouncing them off of others varying perspectives....and sometimes i am clear but can't verbalize my reasoning to someone else so i discuss it with someone in hopes of finding more words to express the feeling...if that makes sense.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  3. #3
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    Enfp
    Enneagram
    497 sx/so
    Socionics
    IEE Fi
    Posts
    14,657

    Default

    It's about setting a baseline for yourself and being in touch with reality. That's what makes you do that. Also, many of us get forcefed some Fe, and as F's we're more sensitive to what others think, in our own way as we tend to value their opinions and happiness.
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  4. #4
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    4w5 sp/sx
    Socionics
    IEI Ni
    Posts
    7,661

    Default

    If I grasp what you're getting at, I don't tend to seek external validation for my emotions or values.

    My emotions are weighed against my values to see if they are appropriate. This is why my emotions are not always in-line with what is expected socially. However, this does not mean all of my emotions are rationalized. More often than not, Fi reasoning wins out, by searching for the meaning in the emotion & the best way to use that information so as to promote positive internal emotion & to not intrude on other people's mental peace.

    My values are based on broad, sort of hazy yet sure, core concepts of right and wrong; the values being somewhat specified so as to fit my needs as an individual. I turn inward to reason through a feeling & see if it is valid by how it relates to those base concepts, I consider many angles so as to be sure I have the right one (I often play devil's advocate with myself), I consider what outcomes similar values have led to in the past, I consider any indications of how these values could play out in the future, and lastly, I seek out external facts which validate the feeling (yes, that's right, I tend to not seek out facts which could invalidate it - inferior Te! ).

    Only when I am totally stumped do I seek external validation; most of the time, it's not figuring out how I feel or whether it is right, but figuring out how to act that stays in accord with the feeling. Maybe I feel I am missing possibilities, or I don't like my options and want some more input. I prefer to get ideas from people or to bounce ideas back & forth than to get validation, basically. Not to say that validation is not nice, but it's not necessary to be sure of what I feel.

    More often than not, I may feel deep down that something is wrong or off, but I have a desire anyway, and I look to other people to justify the desire. This rarely leads to anything good.

    Oh, and not to say I do not value other people's opinions & input. Often I seek input, not to validate my feeling, but so as to act in a way that does not trample someone else's feeling.
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

  5. #5
    A passer by yvonne's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    MBTI
    INfP
    Enneagram
    5w4
    Posts
    564

    Default

    *ponders*

    i'll use a metaphor. imagine a circle in your head. the circle has a solid centre and it sort of gets hazier gradually from that centre. the centre is the core of my Fi. everything that i encounter/ experience in life that i "take in" sticks to the far side of the circle. from there i bring them to test in the centre. they either pass, or fail the test. this is a constant, continuing process and the centre, while fairly solid, also is fluid.
    Enneagram 5w4.

  6. #6
    RETIRED CzeCze's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    MBTI
    GONE
    Posts
    9,051

    Default

    I think Fi and Ti are both ways to reason. Both take external cues and fact(ors) and mash them down into a 'correct answer'.

    I think for an Ne dom, the constant gathering of moar info or need to externally find clues is to be expected.

    I think for Fi doms, the internal mashing process takes longer and more is drawn directly from the psychic-emo soup of Fi.

    Or am I just making that up?

    “If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.” ― Oscar Wilde

    "I'm outtie 5000" ― Romulux

    Johari/Nohari

  7. #7
    lab rat extraordinaire CrystalViolet's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    XNFP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    2,170

    Default

    No, I have to ask some times, just to make sure my reaction isn't disproportional. Like the time I was really offended at some one talking on their mobile in the bathroom. Mostly it's checking to see if what I'm about to do is socially accpetable...I like to check before I'm about to offend people, LOL. Some times I need a calming opinion before I go on a minature crusade, but mostly it's because I need more information before acting on the Fi itch.
    Currently submerged under an avalanche of books and paper work. I may come back up for air from time to time.
    Real life awaits and she is a demanding mistress.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  8. #8
    Banned
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    6w5
    Posts
    3,278

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Orobas View Post
    Hi guys-

    this is a weird question so I am not sure I will phrase it quite the right way so please feel free to correct or redefine.

    Many ENFPs I have ever met have a tendency to seek external affirmation and feedback. This intuitively makes sense for me-I tell you how I feel about an issue, you mirror that, and feel the same way, thus I know what I felt was "okay" or maybe "not okay". Maybe I over reacted or under reacted, I dunno. Sometimes it really is just plucking the Fi connectivities as well-"Is this person still my friend?" I have tried to recognize this as I have aged.

    Since Fi is internal, I assume we are using our external emotional response to a situation to build/prune the Fi rules-the branches of our Fi value systems maybe? But since we are extroverted we will do this partially externalized since we have to "think on our feet"?


    So do other enfps do this same thing? Does this^^ or parts of it sound familiar?

    How do INFPs validate that they are feeling the "right" thing in response to an issue? How do you know if your value or subsequent emotive response being analyzed by Fi is correct since you are introverted? What do you compare it against?

    (This may make no sense at all....)
    Fi is only my dominant function so it is not the only function at work when I make a decision, an evaluation or Heaven forbid, a judgment on something.
    Fi might get the final say, but not before I have consulted my thoughts and considered the feelings of others and potential consequences.
    There is also history I can draw on.
    I also don't mind asking others for advice.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Rebe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    4sop
    Socionics
    IEE
    Posts
    1,505

    Default

    My friends all complain that I ask for advice, but I never take them. This is especially true in 'relationship' issues. That's one issue I struggle the most with and cannot readily say this is the right thing for me to do/say.

    I only do what my friends advice if it makes 'sense' to me. Now, what that 'sense' is made of, I am not sure, probably Fi. On one hand, I believe in the importance of 'experience' but on the other hand, I have hardcore values that these 'experiences' tend to collide over. So I seek out my friends to see if I am overreacting, how 'normal' people deal with it... I never follow someone's advice above my own. Making mistakes is important to determine our own boundaries and reactions, not just society norms or whatnot.

    For less personal issues, I do the same thing. Ask for their opinions and then shift that through my own opinions and sharpen my position. With broad issues, I like to read up on sources. It would make me happy if my friends agree with me, but it is not absolutely necessary, esp. if I believe without a doubt about my stance.

Similar Threads

  1. Please explain the difference between the internal and external world
    By ygolo in forum Philosophy and Spirituality
    Replies: 28
    Last Post: 02-20-2017, 06:10 AM
  2. Fi/Te vs Ti/Fe
    By Emperor Enigma in forum What's my Type?
    Replies: 34
    Last Post: 06-26-2014, 12:20 AM
  3. Let's Discuss Te/Fi,Fi/Te vs. Ti/Fe, Fe/Ti
    By Thalassa in forum General Psychology
    Replies: 29
    Last Post: 02-04-2010, 02:30 PM
  4. Fi/Te vs. Ti/Fe?
    By Cloudblue in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 01-15-2010, 10:09 PM
  5. internal versus external orientation
    By psyche in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 08-24-2009, 09:29 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO