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  1. #11
    Senior Member paradox fox's Avatar
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    Do you ever feel like you are very weird, very odd, and if you let people see what you are really like you will never be accepted or even be shunned?

    YES YES OH GOD UNBELIEVABLY YES

    Do you find you hold parts of yourself back from others, understanding they will find them unacceptable?

    Yes. I try to test out what I can do/say around certain people, make sure we trust each other, then go from there. Also, my INTP friend always says she wishes I would speak my mind more often. I'm never ever bluntly honest with people, I always gotta sugar coat it.

    Do you hold back parts of yourself in fear of overwhelming others with your emotions, your intensity, your depth of thought or feeling, or your insights they may not "get"? (I could see all of these things from the different NF flavors)

    Yeah. I tell myself I shouldn't feel ashamed about silly Ne thoughts but I always end up embarrassing myself.

    *cue wavy flashback*

    One time I was with 2 friends in Starbucks, a guy that I really liked and a girl I didn't know real well. In the car we were talking about paintball, and at s-bux I looked up at the ceiling (there were all these pipes up there) and imagined tiny people playing paintball. My friends started giving me this look: O_o and asked me what the hell I was doing, so I nonchalantly told them about it. But their reaction made me feel really embarrassed. And I was on the phone with the guy a few weeks later and he brought it up again (not being mean about it), and I was like hush up I'm still embarrassed about it.


    Can you describe what your "core", your truest self feels like? What face would you choose to show the world if you knew that you would be unconditionally accepted for everything that you are?

    My truest self? Today I'll say I'm a wad of contradictions held together with glue. I've got shiny, colorful little pieces with ugly, messed-up crud right next to them. I wish I didn't have to worry about people not being able to see the shine because of the shit. But I kind of want people to see all of it. If you want the good parts of me, you gotta understand the bad parts of me. They're inseparable. But don't worry, I'll clean it off as best I can before I hand it to you.

    That made no sense. Sorry guys.
    Just because I'm an INFP doesn't mean I'm emo!

  2. #12
    Senior Member Rebe's Avatar
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    "Do you ever feel like you are very weird, very odd, and if you let people see what you are really like you will never be accepted or even be shunned?"

    I guess unconsciously. I don't really think about it in a conscious way...I don't share openly because I don't want any part of my life or me to be judged. I know some of my weaknesses, but not all and I hate to leave a weak spot without protection and be blind-sided. This does not have to do with weird/odd traits as much as weak traits. A lot of this is unconscious. I am a private person and am very careful about how I portray myself, but if someone asks me why, I couldn't explain thoroughly. Hmmm...

    "Do you find you hold parts of yourself back from others, understanding they will find them unacceptable?"

    I follow social norms. I envy girls who are extremely bubbly and outgoing and does not care how they wave their arms and show excitement in their voices. I am often very controlled, yes.

    "Do you hold back parts of yourself in fear of overwhelming others with your emotions, your intensity, your depth of thought or feeling, or your insights they may not "get"? (I could see all of these things from the different NF flavors)"

    Yes. I can't always clearly explain my thoughts. I know things by uhm an intuitive gut (versus a sensing gut). I am not a good verbal speaker, a very good writer, but zero on the public speaker part. Yes, I like to explain things step by step and if they don't get step 1, I stop there. By steps, I mean layers.

    "Can you describe what your "core", your truest self feels like? What face would you choose to show the world if you knew that you would be unconditionally accepted for everything that you are?"

    I believe a person is defined not just by their core, but by all their layers combined together. So, even if I explain my core, that doesn't mean that is my 'truest self'. My truest self is a combination of what I hide and don't hide, what I can and cannot explain in a few quick sentences, what I accept and do not accept about myself. I will probably be a lot warmer than I am and reach out more to people instead of being so cautious. But my inner core of compassion and dreaminess and romanticism must be combined with my outer core of hyper-criticalness, judgemental-ness and reservation and dark looks to form the truest me.

  3. #13
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Orobas View Post
    Do you ever feel like you are very weird, very odd, and if you let people see what you are really like you will never be accepted or even be shunned?

    Do you find you hold parts of yourself back from others, understanding they will find them unacceptable?

    Do you hold back parts of yourself in fear of overwhelming others with your emotions, your intensity, your depth of thought or feeling, or your insights they may not "get"? (I could see all of these things from the different NF flavors)

    Can you describe what your "core", your truest self feels like? What face would you choose to show the world if you knew that you would be unconditionally accepted for everything that you are?

    (and yes other people besides NFs can answer too... We like all types round these parts!)
    Yes.

    Yes.

    Yes.

    Hard to explain and something I only show to people who've known me and never judged me in all that time. Or..those that are around me 24/7 as I cannot keep it it hidden all the time,which then tends to lead to problems.

    I do show who I am all the time as well.. I just omit a *lot*. Satine Light, you might say. Not worth the hassle to explain yourself over and over.
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  4. #14
    A passer by yvonne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Orobas View Post
    Do you ever feel like you are very weird, very odd, and if you let people see what you are really like you will never be accepted or even be shunned?
    yes, i feel like i am odd, but probably i'm not as odd as i (at times) think i am, though. i am trying to learn how to accept things better... so far this is going better than any of my previous attempts, as i am actively trying to avoid fooling myself and seem to be doing a better job at self-control...

    Do you find you hold parts of yourself back from others, understanding they will find them unacceptable?
    yes i do. i reveal stuff gradually to test what is acceptable to others.

    Do you hold back parts of yourself in fear of overwhelming others with your emotions, your intensity, your depth of thought or feeling, or your insights they may not "get"? (I could see all of these things from the different NF flavors)
    yes and i find this is the only way to go about it for me. i think most of my friends think that i am sympathetic. most of them don't know how much i think and that i also have dark thoughts sometimes. also my emotional life is pretty private. i like being all Ne with some of my friends who enjoy that sort of thing :P

    Can you describe what your "core", your truest self feels like? What face would you choose to show the world if you knew that you would be unconditionally accepted for everything that you are?
    my truest self... it's a work in progress, i suppose. my truest self thinks non-stop. it sometimes goes beyond the structured life i am trying to lead... it makes up theories, plays with and arranges thoughts and feels deeply. at times it pushes and pulls itself. it feels sensations in the moment when i let go. i think, as well as others have said, that i consist of all the parts that make up me. i feel at peace with the me i am showing others when i feel at peace inside.
    Enneagram 5w4.

  5. #15
    78% me Eruca's Avatar
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    Do you ever feel like you are very weird, very odd, and if you let people see what you are really like you will never be accepted or even be shunned?

    To be weird is not to be normal. And what is normal is defined by what the average or most common behaviour is in society. So yes, I am weird, I am odd. But being different isnt a bad thing. In my past I have fallen all too easily into the trap of knowing that being different isnt a bad thing, and yet still feeling like I am *less* than the average person, merely a dysfunctional, flawed form of the average. Such thoughts are inevitable if we do not love our differences. Pretending that our differences make no difference is simply ignoring the problem and can cause much cognitive dissonance.

    Once we truly appreciate our eccentricities they become protected from outside criticism. A good place to start is to know that it is okay not to be perfect. We know we have reached this healthy level when we have the same compassion for others as we do for ourselves.

    Do you find you hold parts of yourself back from others, understanding they will find them unacceptable?

    I will hold back my opinions pretty often, which to me seems all well and good. I don't really hold back parts of myself unless it truly seems unwise to let out said parts. I certainly dont hold back parts of myself because they might receive social disapproval. If I suspect myself of doing just that I imagine myself in the same situation but pretend no social disapproval will arrise. If I go through with showing myself in this imaginery situation--in which no social disapproval can take place--then I will show myself in the real situation in which such disapproval can take place.

    Do you hold back parts of yourself in fear of overwhelming others with your emotions, your intensity, your depth of thought or feeling, or your insights they may not "get"? (I could see all of these things from the different NF flavors)

    Sometimes I avoid sharing thoughts that another might not understand or appreciate. I used to do this to avoid criticism, now I do it because I dislike making other people feel silly or stupid.

    Can you describe what your "core", your truest self feels like? What face would you choose to show the world if you knew that you would be unconditionally accepted for everything that you are?

    My "essence" is complicated. It is for the most part a natural extension of those things I find to be good. For example, to be kind is good, so my essense is to be a kind person. To be modest is to be good, so my essence is to be a modest person. If these things werent my essence, I wouldnt admire them and aspire to them so. Of course, my ideal self is ambitious. But if it wasnt ambitious it wouldnt be worth it would it!

    I feel Im pretty close to my ideal face. Some things in me still have to be hidden. I rarely share my dreams for example, and other stuff has to be hidden from unpleasants who would use it against me.
    I hope I'm wrong, but I believe that he is a fraud, and I think despite all of his rhetoric about being a champion of the working class, it will turn out to be hollow -- Bernie Sanders on Trump

  6. #16
    78% me Eruca's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by paradox fox View Post

    One time I was with 2 friends in Starbucks, a guy that I really liked and a girl I didn't know real well. In the car we were talking about paintball, and at s-bux I looked up at the ceiling (there were all these pipes up there) and imagined tiny people playing paintball. My friends started giving me this look: O_o and asked me what the hell I was doing, so I nonchalantly told them about it. But their reaction made me feel really embarrassed. And I was on the phone with the guy a few weeks later and he brought it up again (not being mean about it), and I was like hush up I'm still embarrassed about it. [/I]
    If one of your friends was the one to make such a comment, would you disapprove? Or would you laugh and think they were cool?

    Why, then, do you measure yourself by a different standard?
    I hope I'm wrong, but I believe that he is a fraud, and I think despite all of his rhetoric about being a champion of the working class, it will turn out to be hollow -- Bernie Sanders on Trump

  7. #17
    is an ambi-turner BRMC117's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Orobas View Post
    Can you describe what your "core", your truest self feels like? What face would you choose to show the world if you knew that you would be unconditionally accepted for everything that you are?
    I have spent my entire life helping people and being malleable to every one elses feeling and ideas that I really have a hard time figuring out who I am... the only thing I can think of would be that I wish all of my family and friends would accept me being gay
    "I put the fires out."
    "you made them worse."
    "worse...or better?"

  8. #18
    Senior Member Yloh's Avatar
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    Do you ever feel like you are very weird, very odd, and if you let people see what you are really like you will never be accepted or even be shunned?

    I've never been into the mainstream like most people are, so I automatically know I am different from most people. In a lot of ways, my differentness comes from me being an N vs the S people. A lot of things people like to talk about tend to be very S oriented subjects (celebrities, sports, what is going on, the next concert, etc). Every now and then I can jump into some S related subjects, but, for the most part, S related subjects just bore me. My favorit S subjects are not mainstream, so that doesn't help too much.

    Being around other Ns makes talking much easier because we tend to share common interests. Also being around Ss who like the same non-mainstream subjects as me are also easy for me to talk to.

    Because I never truly took the time to embrace myself on a lot of subjects Ss enjoy, I feel like I can be a boring person. I love talking with other people, but I can sit silent in a whole group because the subject being talked about is either A: something I have no interest in, B: something I know nothing about, or C: both. I fear other people feel the same way on the subjects that interest me (in other words, I don't care too much for their favorite subjects while they don't care too much for my favorite subjects), so never bringing up my favorite subjects is a common senario.

    This bothers me less now than what it use to be because I know there are people who enjoy the same subjects as I do. There are just less of them. Actually taking the time to learn about what interests other people has been very helpful as well.


    Do you find you hold parts of yourself back from others, understanding they will find them unacceptable?


    Truly, I love being open, honest, and blunt. Problem is, there are people who are very critical and close minded.

    I can't stand close minded people, and I almost never open up to them because being shot down just doesn't appeal to me. I don't care if you have made your decision as long as you have took the time to see all of the angels, or at least listen to a different side.

    Critical people are different as constructive criticism is very useful. For those people, they have to prove to me they truly care and earn my trust. Thing is, if you do nothing but criticize with no encouragement, you will have a hard time getting me to open up.

    I will admit, you have to show me you truly care about me before I can begin to open up to you. Some people do this very quickly while others take more time.

    Do you hold back parts of yourself in fear of overwhelming others with your emotions, your intensity, your depth of thought or feeling, or your insights they may not "get"? (I could see all of these things from the different NF flavors)

    As I said, I love being open, honest, and blunt. I use to be super open with everybody, but I have overwhelmed them with with my emotions, my intensity, my depth or thought or feeling, and/or my insights others may not "get". Learning by doing is my best method of learning and this is a lesson learned the hard way. This has caused me to see if you truly care, before you can see my deeper side.

    Can you describe what your "core", your truest self feels like? What face would you choose to show the world if you knew that you would be unconditionally accepted for everything that you are?

    My core self would like to tell you what I think and/or how I feel at any given moment. The reasons listed above is what is stopping me.

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