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  1. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by MafiaAngel180 View Post
    Lol I have a thing for introverted guys who are socially awkward and nerdy. I can't help it!! When I think of E-men, I think of trouble makers who pick up anything. :P I'm going to hear it now, huh? I would love to be proved wrong here. Seriously!
    Whoa whoa whoa whoa….. wait a minute…. I don’t know what kind of e-men you know, but speaking for myself and the ENFJs that I know, we are the pickiest bastards around… (Definitely too picky in most cases) Even the slightest little action or comment can turn us off. We will definitely start a conversation with anyone, but further than that we are extremely picky.

    i.e. – I met a girl the other day at my college, and we instantly clicked. We talked for about an hour and everything was fine until she made the statement that she didn’t like animals. As soon as she said that, it was like the “click” switch was turned off and immediately I was uninterested. I tried to force myself to look past that small comment, but I just couldn’t. So even though we connected in most areas it still didn’t matter. If I don't connect with someone on a deeper level then it just isn't gonna happen. Maybe when I was younger I could look past the deeper connection thing, but now that i'm older, a deeper connection is actually the thing that I crave most. With ENFJs there is a definite difference between being outgoing and simply just picking anybody up. Just because we are outgoing and can talk to anyone doesn’t mean that we want to.

    I think what you’re referring to are the younger e-men who don’t fully know who they are yet. They are the ones that will pick up anything. But the older more mature ENFJ man that knows exactly who he is would never do this.

  2. #52
    Member MrRandom88's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MafiaAngel180 View Post
    Lol I have a thing for introverted guys who are socially awkward and nerdy. I can't help it!!
    And the sex is ________.

  3. #53
    Guerilla Urbanist Brendan's Avatar
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    About a 50:50 mix.
    There is no such thing as separation from God.

  4. #54
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    Quote Originally Posted by MafiaAngel180 View Post
    Lol I have a thing for introverted guys who are socially awkward and nerdy. I can't help it!! When I think of E-men, I think of trouble makers who pick up anything. :P I'm going to hear it now, huh? I would love to be proved wrong here. Seriously!
    Nah, I really don't think that's true. Although most men, whether or not they are extroverted, in my opinion, do go after whatever seems most physically attractive to them, there are extroverted men out there who do seek deeper connections. There are quite a few that I've met, and some that I still talk to.

    In terms of men just going after anything they can get, that's just a horny guy looking for a quick fix when they can't get anything else. Lol. I really don't think it relates that much as to whether or not the guy is extroverted or introverted, but the extrovert would be quicker to pursue what he wants for the night.

  5. #55
    Crazy Diamond Billy's Avatar
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    I was pursued mostly up through college because I was a bit shy to talk to anyone, so the only way anyone got into my nickers was if they pursued me! :P

    Now its much more even. I am getting much better at putting out the energy in a direct enough fashion to not fall into traps.
    Ground control to Major Tom

  6. #56
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    So we have a nice consensus on the issue. Nf's are more likely to be pursued, with some liking the 50/50 effort, and a few girls with attraction to shy guys

    After dating an ISTP i find myself doing a good amount of the pursuing in the relationship. Has anyone else taken a lesson from another type in this regard?

    Any more stories?

  7. #57
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    Quote Originally Posted by RedruM View Post
    Whoa whoa whoa whoa….. wait a minute…. I don’t know what kind of e-men you know, but speaking for myself and the ENFJs that I know, we are the pickiest bastards around… (Definitely too picky in most cases) Even the slightest little action or comment can turn us off. We will definitely start a conversation with anyone, but further than that we are extremely picky.

    i.e. – I met a girl the other day at my college, and we instantly clicked. We talked for about an hour and everything was fine until she made the statement that she didn’t like animals. As soon as she said that, it was like the “click” switch was turned off and immediately I was uninterested. I tried to force myself to look past that small comment, but I just couldn’t. So even though we connected in most areas it still didn’t matter. If I don't connect with someone on a deeper level then it just isn't gonna happen. Maybe when I was younger I could look past the deeper connection thing, but now that i'm older, a deeper connection is actually the thing that I crave most. With ENFJs there is a definite difference between being outgoing and simply just picking anybody up. Just because we are outgoing and can talk to anyone doesn’t mean that we want to.

    I think what you’re referring to are the younger e-men who don’t fully know who they are yet. They are the ones that will pick up anything. But the older more mature ENFJ man that knows exactly who he is would never do this.
    I have an Ex who is an ENFJ and is a complete doormat for anyone who comes his way, no real standards to be seen. Is that a younger ENFJ problem?
    Last edited by Patches; 12-20-2013 at 02:06 AM.

  8. #58
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dahlila View Post
    I have an Ex who is an ENFJ and is a complete doormat for anyone who comes his way, no real standards to be seen. Is that a younger ENFJ problem?
    Hmmmmm... that's a tough one. I really don't want to generalize about age, but it is definitely a maturity thing. A young ENFJ that hasn't really discovered himself or found his place in the world can definitely have this problem. Of course there are younger ENFJs that aren't doormats, so the main issue has to do with experience and maturity. An immature ENFJ that lacks life experience can definitely be a doormat. All of the ENFJs that I know grew up in rough neighborhoods, so out of necessity we had to "toughen ourselves up" so that people would not try and take advantage of our kindness. It's fairly easy to take advantage of an immature ENFJ, but a mature ENFJ that knows exactly who they are would never let this happen. So I guess it kind of has to do with age, because with age comes maturity. (for most people). But I guess there are some of us that just mature faster than others. For myself I had to mature real fast in order to ensure my survival.

  9. #59
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    Hmmm; I'd rather pursue; but that's probably because I am male and I am ENFJ, so I sort of feel that I *should* pursue? I'd also feel slightly weird being pursued too, especially by someone I don't think I can return the feelings for
    hmm

  10. #60
    Symbolic Herald Vasilisa's Avatar
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    I'm typically pursued.
    But when I am loving you back, I delight in doing little acts of love that can melt your heart.
    the formless thing which gives things form!
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