User Tag List

12 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 13

  1. #1
    Senior Member INTPness's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4
    Posts
    2,158

    Default ENFP's and long-distance "relationships"

    Question for Eeh enn eff pees:

    Introverts are often able to have some really great conversation through writing. Intense and fun and it builds to the point where the introverts eventually want to meet each other. My experience with ENFP's has been a bit different in that you guys seem to feed off of the energy of being with another person. And I've read posts on here that kind of say the same thing: We like people's energy, etc. Yet you guys are here posting on the internet, so you must get some enjoyment out of written communication.

    Anyways, to the point: I'd like to strike something up with an eeh enn eff pee acquaintance that I know I won't be able to see for several months. I'm totally fine with that. The written communication, for me, is my chance to get to know her slowly and, ideally, it would culminate with me taking her on a friendly date when I'm in her area.

    Does the idea of building a "written friendship" hold any value or is she more likely to think, "Just forget the pen-pal thing and call me when you get to town?"

    Thoughts?
    NTJ's are the only types that have ever made me feel emo.
    ENP's are the only types that have ever made me feel like a sensor.


    There are two great days in a person's life - the day we are born and the day we discover why. --William Barclay

  2. #2
    Senior Member Malkavia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    MBTI
    ENXP
    Enneagram
    3w4
    Posts
    296

    Default

    I think it would depend on the person. If an ENFP enjoys writing or reading and can feel emotions through words I dont think it would be a problem. The patience of waiting if its through the mail can get annoying though.

  3. #3
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/so
    Posts
    18,086

    Default

    just try it and see...i think enfps value connections of all kinds and i personally think it's cool getting to know someone you might not normally have the chance to.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  4. #4
    Senior Member INTPness's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4
    Posts
    2,158

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Malkavia View Post
    I think it would depend on the person. If an ENFP enjoys writing or reading and can feel emotions through words I dont think it would be a problem. The patience of waiting if its through the mail can get annoying though.
    E-mail would be the mode of communication. Or texts maybe at some point. For the introvert it can be ideal, but for the ENFP, maybe it's WAY more boring than hanging out with someone in person - in which case I won't bother.
    NTJ's are the only types that have ever made me feel emo.
    ENP's are the only types that have ever made me feel like a sensor.


    There are two great days in a person's life - the day we are born and the day we discover why. --William Barclay

  5. #5
    RETIRED CzeCze's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    MBTI
    GONE
    Posts
    9,051

    Default

    A few of my ENFP female friends love handwritten and old school letter writing. I like verbal and written communication, I think it's related to type and most ENFPs enjoy reading and writing emails, etc. I would say no harm in starting. She may not be very consistent writing back, but then you have that shared 'P' so maybe you don't mind and you might not be very consistent either.

    BTW, folks are really into skyping and video chatting these days, too.

    Emailing is a great supplement when you can't physically be near someone. I could write massive emails and I <3 receiving certain kinds of long, story telling emails. They are more like old school letters which I enjoyed writing when I was younger.
    “If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.” ― Oscar Wilde

    "I'm outtie 5000" ― Romulux

    Johari/Nohari

  6. #6
    Was E.laur Laurie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    7w6
    Socionics
    ENFp
    Posts
    6,075

    Default

    Sounds ok to me.

  7. #7
    Senior Member INTPness's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4
    Posts
    2,158

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Lady X View Post
    just try it and see...i think enfps value connections of all kinds and i personally think it's cool getting to know someone you might not normally have the chance to.
    Yeah, that's kind of the way I see it. Can't hurt to give it a shot. I just don't know that the things that ENFP's enjoy most about me really translate that well into writing/e-mail. With introverted intuitives, both parties enjoy the slow process of opening up and getting to know each other. With ENFP's, we usually just hit it off immediately (in person) and hit the ground running. If that's the case, I'd rather just contact her when I can see her, rather than bore her with the e-mails.
    NTJ's are the only types that have ever made me feel emo.
    ENP's are the only types that have ever made me feel like a sensor.


    There are two great days in a person's life - the day we are born and the day we discover why. --William Barclay

  8. #8
    Senior Member INTPness's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4
    Posts
    2,158

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by CzeCze View Post
    Emailing is a great supplement when you can't physically be near someone. I could write massive emails and I <3 receiving certain kinds of long, story telling emails. They are more like old school letters which I enjoyed writing when I was younger.
    That's good to know. Stories she wants, stories she'll get!
    NTJ's are the only types that have ever made me feel emo.
    ENP's are the only types that have ever made me feel like a sensor.


    There are two great days in a person's life - the day we are born and the day we discover why. --William Barclay

  9. #9
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/so
    Posts
    18,086

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by INTPness View Post
    Yeah, that's kind of the way I see it. Can't hurt to give it a shot. I just don't know that the things that ENFP's enjoy most about me even translate that well into writing/e-mail. With introverted intuitives, both parties enjoy the slow process of opening up and getting to know each other. With ENFP's, we usually just hit it off immediately (in person) and hit the ground running. If that's the case, I'd rather just contact her when I can see her, rather than bore her with the e-mails.
    well if she doesn't love emails then you'll notice in the way she responds. she'll either be pretty enthusiastic about it and ask questions to encourage more back and forth or she'll respond with something that kind of closes the topic and maybe imply that she'll just talk with you if you come in town or something.

    i should add that i have friends i email and im with and i love it...it lets me have social interaction even when i'm home...that's good for an extravert! haha
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  10. #10
    Senior Member Malkavia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    MBTI
    ENXP
    Enneagram
    3w4
    Posts
    296

    Default

    I think you should go for it. If you stay committed and write to her throughout these months I think it would mean a lot to her.

Similar Threads

  1. [INFJ] INFJ and distance in relationships
    By laudanum225 in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: 02-21-2010, 08:12 PM
  2. [ENFJ] ENFJ and long term relationships.
    By Cypocalypse in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 62
    Last Post: 10-04-2009, 08:00 PM
  3. [NT] INTP/INTJ long distance relationships
    By Risen in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 05-27-2008, 08:15 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO