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  1. #61
    Kraken down on piracy Lux's Avatar
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    I bond with some people quickly, it is rare but amazing when it happens. With others the bond takes more time. Both can be strong bonds for me. Regarding the people I bond with quickly, I tend to have more of an initial connection with and the bond seems more intense and usually stronger. But it is situational as well.
    "It is not length of life, but depth of life." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

    "Thought breeds thought." ~ Henry David Thoreau

  2. #62
    Uniqueorn William K's Avatar
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    This thread's title reminds me of a Super Glue advertisment
    4w5, Fi>Ne>Ti>Si>Ni>Fe>Te>Se, sp > so > sx

    appreciates being appreciated, conflicted over conflicts, afraid of being afraid, bad at being bad, predictably unpredictable, consistently inconsistent, remarkably unremarkable...

    I may not agree with what you are feeling, but I will defend to death your right to have a good cry over it

    The whole problem with the world is that fools & fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts. ~ Bertrand Russell

  3. #63
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post
    Even in person, several of my closest friends developed through writing. Probably why most of my closest friends are long-distance now. We met in person & began a friendship in the usual way, but when they moved we got closer through letter/email communication.
    Its funny. Most of my close irl friends are entps-once we part ways we dont stay in touch-but if we meet up after years, we are back to laughing like crazy. I dont trust anyone with my emotions typically, so it is real weird here as I do share emtotions-which is sharing my core self-my soul I guess?

    Quote Originally Posted by yvonne View Post
    i find this bit hard, because i start to care about people very quickly, if they share their feelings with me. i have to be careful with my fi, though... because it gets a bit difficult, if you find yourself in it too deep.
    Yeah. If you make me talk about my emotions by asking questions about them-I feel those emotions. To describe them is to feel them-thus I will begin to bond with you just via sharing. It's part of the reason I started the "what are you feeling" thread. I need to understand how to openly share emotions-very scary for an enfp for some reason. I also need to be able to do so and not develop deep bonds with those I am sharing with-which is actually making me tear up right now. Just the thought of sharing the emotion, with a generic "other human", no person in particular, makes me emo. ewwwww......

    I would love advise and guidance on how to handle this better.

  4. #64
    A passer by yvonne's Avatar
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    yeah... it's a bit hard, because you pick up emotions and take them to your heart... even here it's not just words. i thought it would be easier here, as we don't know each other, but it isn't, lol. the "what are you feeling" thread is great! it's easier there, i think. it still makes me feel like i am sharing an emotion, but it's generic enough that it's easier.

    it's not a wish not to bond, it's just that i can't keep bonding deeply with people, because then i'd miss them and think about them all the time and i can't miss them, because they're on the internet, lol.
    Enneagram 5w4.

  5. #65
    Striving for balance Little Linguist's Avatar
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    I find it quite easy to connect with people now, but it was not always the case. It has been more of a learned trait for me; however, now it comes so naturally that I do not even think about it.

    One interesting aspect of this ability is that it happens much more easily and naturally in real life than online. When I teach, when I am out and about, I find people open up to me much more than online.

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