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  1. #6461
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmotini View Post
    So I should probably be really happy that I'm not.

    N'est-ce pas?
    Not happy, when you should be really happy? You sit in front of me sipping your tea. Are you looking unhappy? Well, actually you are looking angry. I wonder whether you are angry at me, but then decide you are not. So we let your anger float between us. We breathe. I watch your breath blowing over the top of your tea, and I start to follow your breath. I am starting to feel turbulent with tears in my eyes as we breath together, sipping our tea.

    I find it hard to let you go, but invite you back for tea next time you should be happy, but are feeling unhappy.

    @Marmotini

  2. #6462

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    Quote Originally Posted by IllusoryReverie View Post
    It seems like a lot of people on forums like these tend to put on a very animated, childish facade a lot of times and it just ends up looking extremely odd and flaky. Like they're putting on some kind of an act while presenting the virtual version of themselves. It's annoying. I suppose a decent percent of the people who end up reading this will quickly write it off thinking, "Of course she's going to say that, she's a Four." But I'm only writing from what I've seen and I would think that anyone with a decent set of eyes and a mind would see the same.
    So what? How are you to be seen if not for an image? And what does it matter the type of image? A 4 on another forum once said something that stuck with me. Something along the lines of... A 4 that discovers the enneagram will eventually realize that trying to be true and authentic is still going for an image. It's still so very contrived. I've seen a 4w5 on another forum criticize others for similar things, accusing others of being 3s. What was ironic is the level of imagey-ness that oozed from this individual. It was in the writing, the avatar, the sig, the implications. This person was an image try-hard that accused others for being image try-hards. Still as rotten as the rest of em'.

    And I should know this. I'm the hypocrite. The fraud. The false. Even as I say this, admitting fault, it's still going for an image. How inauthentic.

  3. #6463
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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    Not happy, when you should be really happy? You sit in front of me sipping your tea. Are you looking unhappy? Well, actually you are looking angry. I wonder whether you are angry at me, but then decide you are not. So we let your anger float between us. We breathe. I watch your breath blowing over the top of your tea, and I start to follow your breath. I am starting to feel turbulent with tears in my eyes as we breath together, sipping our tea.

    I find it hard to let you go, but invite you back for tea next time you should be happy, but are feeling unhappy.

    @Marmotini
    I appreciate this very much Victor, but I figured out what was going on with me. I was trying to repress one person with another, and that doesn't work.

    I have to work through my feelings for the first person, like it or not, and be able to let them go; otherwise I'm just projecting all kinds of crap on to the second person.

    I just can't figure out why it's taking so long, if it means there is indeed unfinished business, or it's a non-grasping thing.

  4. #6464
    Member IllusoryReverie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Loki View Post
    So what? How are you to be seen if not for an image? And what does it matter the type of image? A 4 on another forum once said something that stuck with me. Something along the lines of... A 4 that discovers the enneagram will eventually realize that trying to be true and authentic is still going for an image. It's still so very contrived. I've seen a 4w5 on another forum criticize others for similar things, accusing others of being 3s. What was ironic is the level of imagey-ness that oozed from this individual. It was in the writing, the avatar, the sig, the implications. This person was an image try-hard that accused others for being image try-hards. Still as rotten as the rest of em'.

    And I should know this. I'm the hypocrite. The fraud. The false. Even as I say this, admitting fault, it's still going for an image. How inauthentic.
    Obviously everyone portrays an image of some sort but I don't think it kills to point out any irritation that you have with another's tendencies. We all feel them from time to time. This thread is titled "What are you feeling right now," right? So people shouldn't have to feel ashamed to express how they feel about something, one way or another. No matter what you say or express there will always be someone displeased with it.
    “The first progressive step by a mind overwhelmed by the strangeness of things is to realize that this feeling of strangeness is shared with all men and that human reality, in its entirety, suffers from the distance which separates it from the rest of the universe." -Albert Camus

  5. #6465
    Member IllusoryReverie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    Do I put on an animated, childish facade and end up looking odd and flaky?

    I would only know if you told me.
    I haven't been present on this particular site long enough to know that about you personally. From what I've seen of your posts you don't seem to, at least.

    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    Thank heavens for @IllusoryReverie.
    Thank heavens for the sarcasm. I wasn't pretending that I have it all together. No one does but I don't see anything wrong with expressing frustrations that we all tend to have with people from time to time.
    “The first progressive step by a mind overwhelmed by the strangeness of things is to realize that this feeling of strangeness is shared with all men and that human reality, in its entirety, suffers from the distance which separates it from the rest of the universe." -Albert Camus

  6. #6466
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    Realizing that I've never been emotionally intimate with anyone, that I want to be, and that it might not be possible. Distressing thought.

  7. #6467

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    Quote Originally Posted by IllusoryReverie View Post

    Thank heavens for the sarcasm. I wasn't pretending that I have it all together. No one does but I don't see anything wrong with expressing frustrations that we all tend to have with people from time to time.
    I'm offended.
    To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.
    ~ Elbert Hubbard

    Music provides one of the clearest examples of a much deeper relation between mathematics and human experience.

  8. #6468
    Wake, See, Sing, Dance Cellmold's Avatar
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    Divorced from reality, whatever reality happens to be once it sorts itself out.
    'Consciousness is not simply a sensory-perceptual affair, a matter of mental imagery, as the contents of our mind would have us believe. It is deeply enmeshed with the brain mechanisms that automatically promote action readiness' - Jaak Panksepp

  9. #6469

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    Quote Originally Posted by IllusoryReverie View Post
    Obviously everyone portrays an image of some sort but I don't think it kills to point out any irritation that you have with another's tendencies. We all feel them from time to time. This thread is titled "What are you feeling right now," right? So people shouldn't have to feel ashamed to express how they feel about something, one way or another. No matter what you say or express there will always be someone displeased with it.
    I was trying to throw another perspective into the mix. If you feel the freedom to express your displeasure and irritation towards others, then I am free do so as well. It was not intended as shaming, but I realize that it came across that way.

  10. #6470
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    I'm really tired and raw and a bit confused.


    Edit: Re the image discussion, I think @IllusoryReverie makes an interesting point, and there is a tendency online for people to present an image that does not convey their true selves entirely. Image construction that dominates social interaction can be frustrating and it isn't about rejecting "3's" (which is an interesting irony because to label oneself as a number is an example of one-dimensional image creation). Images are constructed to control the responses of others. This is true online or in the professional realm. People find ways to make the responses of others more consistent, and in this way they are able to control people. Some want all positive responses and so pretend to be kinder and sweeter than they actually are. Some are deliberately antagonistic so that people will react in a one-dimensional manner. Some are withdrawn so they will be left alone, others are intrusive to insure some form of attention and reaction.

    Image creation tends to call upon falseness for the sake of control. It is a form of social manipulation. While it is true that we all have to find some comprehensible way to present ourselves, there are ways to do this which seek authenticity and ways which seek manipulation. On a pragmatic level that manipulation can be necessary in a commercialized society in order to establish oneself and survive economically, but all in all I find it irritating and disappointing as well when it is false, manipulative, and controlling.
    Quote Originally Posted by Grand Admiral Crunch View Post
    It might be fine for some people, but I rather not live in a world where people think it is okay for dolphins to rape each other.

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