User Tag List

Page 1215 of 1261 FirstFirst ... 215715111511651205121312141215121612171225 ... LastLast
Results 12,141 to 12,150 of 12602

Thread: What are you feeling right now?

  1. #12141
    Junior Member Array Draconic's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    MBTI
    Ayyy
    Posts
    10

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Morning Star View Post
    Pretty much this: Thoughts From The Heart: An Open Diary: Entry #9: Battling Inner Demons

    I've just felt... defeated, these days. I feel like I'm a monster right now who can never love or be loved, and the thought of it really sucks...
    ISFJ here
    Just know that all humans deserved to be loved despite anything negative they do. Just don't give up cause those demons don't define you as a whole.
    "When I am king, you will be first against the wall
    With your opinion which is of no consequence at all"
    ~Radiodead

    Completely ISFJaded

    I am the roots that hold the tree together
    As well as the wind beneath your wings
    (Poetry expert)

  2. #12142
    Healer-in-Training Array Morning Star's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/so
    Socionics
    EII Ne
    Posts
    1,349

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Draconic View Post
    ISFJ here
    Just know that all humans deserved to be loved despite anything negative they do. Just don't give up cause those demons don't define you as a whole.
    Welcome new member thanks dear
    Only she who attempts the absurd can achieve the impossible... and then some.

    MY BLOGS: https://freestylelines.blogspot.com/, https://tfthdiary.blogspot.com/
    TWITTER: https://twitter.com/angel_ss1
    TUMBLR: http://angelight1.tumblr.com/


  3. #12143
    Member Array flourine's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    MBTI
    KTAJ
    Enneagram
    2hu
    Socionics
    lol None
    Posts
    39

    Default

    The Ecstasies of Gold.

    COMPLETELY SERIOUS SIG

    kaleidoscopic, turbulent, assertive, judging
    Alignment: Chaotic Apple | Lawful Orange
    Type: 14 billion different ones
    Functions: ALL
    Enneagram: 37w34 - -324w3 - 78w-43 smh/spo
    Grysltherravenhufflshoff - Divergendauntwithoutabnecandor - All other factions/houses in existence
    Temperament: PhlegChlorSangWatermelons
    Pastafarian Gnostic Agnostic Ignostic Theistic Atheistic
    [Insert Jargon Deep Quotes Here lololol]
    Art Credits: Presumably kaoru (for the pic)

  4. #12144
    Senior Member Array Mvika's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    4w3 sx/sp
    Socionics
    IEE Ne
    Posts
    186

    Default

    Wondering for the n+1th time (where n is the last number on the positive side of the number line), why I can't have the freedom of an adult without the concomitant responsibilities?

    I know, I know... But still. I feel as if I can wear that hat from time to time, but cannot sleep in it.
    When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.
    When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.


    -Kahlil Gibran in The Prophet

  5. #12145
    santa's elf Array theforsaken's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2015
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    269 sx
    Socionics
    IEI Fe
    Posts
    1,554

    Default

    Kind of bitter.

    #yaaaaassss

  6. #12146
    Healer-in-Training Array Morning Star's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/so
    Socionics
    EII Ne
    Posts
    1,349

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by theforsaken View Post
    Kind of bitter.
    Oh dear hope you'll be fine
    Only she who attempts the absurd can achieve the impossible... and then some.

    MY BLOGS: https://freestylelines.blogspot.com/, https://tfthdiary.blogspot.com/
    TWITTER: https://twitter.com/angel_ss1
    TUMBLR: http://angelight1.tumblr.com/

    Likes theforsaken liked this post

  7. #12147
    Happy Dancer Array uumlau's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    953 sp/so
    Posts
    5,559

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Mvika View Post
    Wondering for the n+1th time (where n is the last number on the positive side of the number line), why I can't have the freedom of an adult without the concomitant responsibilities?

    I know, I know... But still. I feel as if I can wear that hat from time to time, but cannot sleep in it.
    Phrasing the answer so that an ENFP can understand it at a gut level:



    "With great power comes great responsibility."

    OR, even more aptly ...



    “People have forgotten this truth," the fox said. "But you mustn’t forget it. You become responsible forever for what you’ve tamed. You’re responsible for your rose.”

    These responsibilities never go away, but when they're assumed out of love, they're quite fulfilling and remarkably easy to bear.
    An argument is two people sharing their ignorance.

    A discussion is two people sharing their understanding, even when they disagree.

  8. #12148
    Senior Member Array Mvika's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    4w3 sx/sp
    Socionics
    IEE Ne
    Posts
    186

    Default responsibility, yes; power, no. :(

    Quote Originally Posted by uumlau View Post
    Phrasing the answer so that an ENFP can understand it at a gut level:



    "With great power comes great responsibility."



    These responsibilities never go away, but when they're assumed out of love, they're quite fulfilling and remarkably easy to bear.
    Thank you, Uumlau! I agree that responsibilities are just the other side of coin. I think one of the problems some ENFPs like myself face is that we don't feel the POWER that supposedly comes with the adult stance. I have always lost out whenever I have agreed to, "let's sit down and discuss this like reasonable adults." And this was not because what I wanted was unreasonable or even close to what was merited (using opinions from impartial sources here). When I agree to pay now and fly later, I always find myself in the grip of usury and the paying never ends. I am in my 30s now and still don't have a reliable game face or a standard opening move. I love most people (individuals) and am usually well-liked , but unlike my SFJ and NFJ or even ENTP friends, don't know how to practically benefit from this "people touch." At work, I am seen as either too task-oriented and hyper-focussed, or as too flighty and not ambitious enough. So despite working very hard, having solid accomplishments and powering through many a crises ( at the expense of alienating people by being hard as nails), I am still not taken seriously in "adult" matters.
    So it feels like the old trap set by my SJ parents-- video games after homework where the homework takes up all the free time. If you call their bluff and decide to play a little, then there is the confirmation bias about enfps. I think growing up only works for the types with natural gravitas or at least, well-developed Fe.
    When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.
    When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.


    -Kahlil Gibran in The Prophet

  9. #12149
    Happy Dancer Array uumlau's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    953 sp/so
    Posts
    5,559

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Mvika View Post
    Thank you, Uumlau! I agree that responsibilities are just the other side of coin. I think one of the problems some ENFPs like myself face is that we don't feel the POWER that supposedly comes with the adult stance. I have always lost out whenever I have agreed to, "let's sit down and discuss this like reasonable adults." And this was not because what I wanted was unreasonable or even close to what was merited (using opinions from impartial sources here). When I agree to pay now and fly later, I always find myself in the grip of usury and the paying never ends. I am in my 30s now and still don't have a reliable game face or a standard opening move. I love most people (individuals) and am usually well-liked , but unlike my SFJ and NFJ or even ENTP friends, don't know how to practically benefit from this "people touch." At work, I am seen as either too task-oriented and hyper-focussed, or as too flighty and not ambitious enough. So despite working very hard, having solid accomplishments and powering through many a crises ( at the expense of alienating people by being hard as nails), I am still not taken seriously in "adult" matters.
    So it feels like the old trap set by my SJ parents-- video games after homework where the homework takes up all the free time. If you call their bluff and decide to play a little, then there is the confirmation bias about enfps. I think growing up only works for the types with natural gravitas or at least, well-developed Fe.
    I see that you've gotten in touch with your "ESTJ" side. From what I've observed, based on function theory and overall patterns with types, each type has a stress mode that is indicated by both the tertiary and inferior functions, Te-Si for the ENFP. (The INTJ stress mode is ISFP - the techno-nerdy INTJ under stress becomes the moody heavy metal rocker or the isolated cat lady.) So ENFPs tend to switch between a "funloving but kind of flighty" mode and a stressed-out "hard as nails", very much powering their way through a crisis, as you put it.

    Both of these are the "real you". There's nothing wrong, here. It's just that for a lot of people, these two halves never really "talk together" when one is younger. It's almost always one or the other, and it often feels like one is good and the other is bad. The trick is to figure out how to be both at the same time, more or less. Jung considered this kind of melding with one's shadow an ideal psychological state.

    The trick is to spot how the ESTJ side of you is fucking up, and looking at the kinds of problems ESTJs have to deal with can help you cope with that side of yourself. It isn't that real ESTJs are better than you at this stuff so much as they started working on this side of themselves FIRST, whereas for you, you've had to work your way up to it. In the other direction, ESTJs are having to learn how to deal with their ENFP side as they get older: imagine being used to being so responsible, when suddenly you can't help but just goof off and enjoy the feelz. It's just as scary for them.

    Eventually, you can get your ESTJ side tuned up enough that the daily grind doesn't stress you out so much. The main thing is that you have to face it head on. Not torture yourself whenever you fail, but rather just go in and do you best and muddle through like everyone has to at first. Upon doing so, you'll discover your hidden talents in this area, and learn how to use them without pissing off everyone around you, just the same way the ESTJs eventually have to learn how not to piss off everyone around them.

    Eventually, you can use this as a counterweight to the main flaw I see in ENFPs. I think ENFPs fall victim to their ability to charm other people. It's a pattern I see over and over: they charm others in their life and get exactly what they want, without even realizing it. Then when they don't get what they want, or someone calls them on going too far, they become very hurt (for a short while). So they end up with all the short term advantages of being able to charm people, but struggle with the long term advantages because they don't realize why people like them in the first place.

    This is not a riff against ENFPs, btw, just pointing out cause and effect: every trait that is a strength implies a corresponding weakness. Being kind of bad at initiating connections with other people (i.e., not being charming) implies that one puts a lot more effort into maintaining the connections one has. Being kind of good at initiating connections with people makes one (unconsciously! - quite unconsciously) not readily learn how to maintain connections. That's why I included the fox's quote. It isn't JUST about power. It's that everything GOOD in our relationships with other people comes from being able to master both creating and maintaining connections, but when we start out, only one of these (if any!) is easy for us.

    Essentially, ENFPs need to learn how to turn down their charm - which is turned way up because it is being used as kind of a defense - and deal with people a bit more honestly. That word "honestly" might seem out of place: ENFPs tend to have a very high integrity and tend to be very honest overall (if a bit flighty). The problem isn't that they lie a lot to other people, but that they lie to themselves (as all humans do - different types just tell different lies). The lie that ENFPs believe is that they have to turn on the charm in order to make the people around them happy. The truth is that ENFPs turn on the charm to cancel out the negative emotional vibes around them that they are so very sensitive to. ENFPs can just sense the emotional energy in a room, and it can make them hyper. The charm is used to tweak others emotionally until they vibe something that suits the ENFP better. This isn't some sort of evil manipulation, it's an automatic defense.

    Once an ENFP realizes that this is what is going on, the rest kind of works out. Others' emotions become much less threatening, and the need to turn on the charm is less (but you can still turn it on for fun!). And you realize that you can become great friends with people without charming them.

    I think this dynamic is why there is often an attraction between ENFPs and INTJs. On the ENFP end, the INTJ does two things that make him/her swoon. 1) The INTJ takes the ENFP seriously. ENFPs are so used to being thought of as flakey that they love this. 2) The ENFP's usual charm tactics don't actually work on INTJs. (Not that an INTJ wouldn't react at all, but the reactions tend to be completely different.) Once you realize that by toning down the charm, people will automatically take you more seriously, and you'll start to see connections that weren't visible before.
    An argument is two people sharing their ignorance.

    A discussion is two people sharing their understanding, even when they disagree.
    Likes Mvika, N/A liked this post

  10. #12150
    Senior Member Array Mvika's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    4w3 sx/sp
    Socionics
    IEE Ne
    Posts
    186

    Default

    I am going to print this out and read it every morning for a week. It is as if you could look into my soul, Uumlau. Very scary if I were a less open person. For once, I did not get so caught up with my Fi that I forgot to appreciate that this gift of understanding and advice was an utterly selfless and good (not nice--hate that word!) offering. Simply-Thank you.
    Can I reply to this in detail in two parts (a) the birth of ESTJ in the ENFP, (b) ENFP's stunted emotional growth? Would this be the right place for it? Would it be too much information? I am never sure of when my Ne-Fi has removed me from normal and proper social sphere, so these are not "formality" questions. I trust your judgment on this. Please let me know!

    As an aside, my mother, with whom I have the most deepest and strongest and rawest emotional relationship but an oil-n-water mental connection, is an ESTJ! It would be interesting to do some systematic research on how many ENFPs were raised by ESTJ parents (especially of the same sex.)
    When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.
    When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.


    -Kahlil Gibran in The Prophet

Similar Threads

  1. [ISTP] Why am I feeling so emo?
    By sLiPpY in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 34
    Last Post: 03-25-2016, 09:16 PM
  2. [NF] Introverted Feeling vs. Extraverted Feeling
    By Silence11 in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 145
    Last Post: 08-17-2014, 08:56 PM
  3. [MBTItm] If you're feeling down...
    By Koocoomoo in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 10-12-2013, 03:02 PM
  4. [MBTItm] why do I get the feeling
    By whimsical in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 24
    Last Post: 04-22-2009, 11:37 AM
  5. Feeling like you're alone
    By substitute in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 57
    Last Post: 10-15-2008, 12:36 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO