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[MBTI General] relationship problem...

Rebe

New member
Joined
Nov 15, 2009
Messages
1,431
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4sop
to be in one or not to be in one...with an istp. i have been thinking and thinking about this for weeks and i am 50/50. some moments i'm all like YES, let's do this! live my life and be happy! and other moments I'm all like this makes no sense whatsoever and have no chance of succeeding

reasons for it being an extremely illogical choice: (if I am intj, i would be done with this very quickly)

- we will be geographically separate from each other for most of the year, say 80% of the year

- the age difference is huge, i am still in college and he is in his late twenties, though he acts like a young twenty :newwink:

- we are not the most compatible when it comes to interests...though we enjoy spending time together and have topics to talk about and we feel very natural toward each other, never any awkward-ness or shyness

- sometimes we are just not on the same page and can't connect the way I did with an NT intellectually, not to say that he is not smart, he is, very much so. he doesn't understand me well and can't foresee my reactions.

- i am a planner (where are we going, physically and mentally) and he likes to be extremely spontaneous

- i feel...i Know that all the perks of a relationship cannot be done over the phone, i don't like phones, he doesn't like phones, it's just not a work-able idea

why i would say yes:
- he apparently likes me a whole lot and is willing to work this out
- and i quite like him too
- and i always try to live and experience life, that's better than being cautious and plotting every single future moment
- and it may be about time i give something a chance and be hopeful :shock: and trust someone :shock:

If we were in the same town and if I didn't have this big problem that I think I should tackle on my own (health related), I would definitely give it a chance. But that'd be an ideal situation and oh dear, life is not all simple and pretty.

I am stuck between reason and emotion. I can't listen to either. Maybe I can listen to one of you. Anyone? Hmm? :cry:
 

am_i_evil666

New member
Joined
Apr 3, 2008
Messages
325
I say try it. Forget of all the reasons not to. If it works, great! If not...at least you won't regret not trying it.
I know it's easier to say it than to do it, but think, what do you have to lose?

You have stated all the reasons it might not work out, but maybe you should weigh what you have to lose or to win trying. If you really want a rational approach.
 

TopherRed

New member
Joined
Jul 28, 2009
Messages
1,272
MBTI Type
ENFJ
Enneagram
2w3
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
Ooo...just saw this one after I launched mine. :)
 

Rainne

One day and the next
Joined
Mar 7, 2010
Messages
875
MBTI Type
ISTP
Give it a shot. If it doesn't work out, whatever.
 

Sarcasticus

Circus Maximus
Joined
May 3, 2008
Messages
1,037
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
5w4
I would have a hard time with a long-distance relationship but I've seen others make them work.
 
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