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  1. #221
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    I haven't had a chance to read the whole thread, but I just want to put in a good word for ENTPs! When I was younger, I was hurt by a few of them, but I've learned that, at least for me, they are the people that I can have the deepest most passionate connection with (for whatever reason) and the feeling of balance is...extraordinary. There are down sides, of course, but I've come to be able to recognize ENTPs immediately and have made several of them, along with their INTP cousins, my very good friends.

    I think the thing an INFJ needs to remember is that ENTPs are *very different* than you are. Their initial flightiness or unwillingness to commit does not mean they are not capable of very committed, passionate, loving relationships. The trick really is to not jump at initial signs of interest, even if you become lovers. When an ENTP is ready to commit to you trust me, he will let you know and never let go, but not a minute before.

    I definitely think it's about maturity. As a mature INFJ, it's become much easier for me to give people the space to be who they are without feeling like I'm sacrificing or surrendering a part of myself in the process. When I was younger, I wore my heart on my sleeve for almost anyone and, naturally, got stomped on. A mature ENTP is more likely to have spent a lot of time chasing both women and his own projects and maybe even be searching for something more. He may be more ready to take and cherish what you have to give him.

    That said, there is a lot about this that is individual. My sister, an INFJ, is dating an INTP. As far as I can see, they are seriously, deeply in love, but they have broken up and gotten back together *so many times* and well...there's nothing in her life that's not high drama. I've introduced her to MBTI and it seems to have helped them both a bit, but I think she just lives in an even higher key than I do (and I live in a higher key than most). I think she might be too easily hurt if she tried dating an ENTP.

    But anyway, INFJs (especially the ladies), we need to be better at protecting our hearts and not giving them freely until someone has really built us a safe space for them in their own hearts. Just because we are so willing to give does not mean everyone is equally able to respect, understand, and protect the gift.

    Long and short of it is I think I am going to keep loving ENTPs for the rest of my life. Hope I can marry one!

  2. #222
    Once Was Synarch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by abyssinia View Post
    I haven't had a chance to read the whole thread, but I just want to put in a good word for ENTPs! When I was younger, I was hurt by a few of them, but I've learned that, at least for me, they are the people that I can have the deepest most passionate connection with (for whatever reason) and the feeling of balance is...extraordinary. There are down sides, of course, but I've come to be able to recognize ENTPs immediately and have made several of them, along with their INTP cousins, my very good friends.
    Yes. Balance. It's what life is all about isn't it? A journey toward harmonious existence. Harmony with each other. Harmony with the world. Harmony with ourselves. The last one is particularly hard for me, but with help from the people I am close to it seems attainable.

    I think the thing an INFJ needs to remember is that ENTPs are *very different* than you are. Their initial flightiness or unwillingness to commit does not mean they are not capable of very committed, passionate, loving relationships. The trick really is to not jump at initial signs of interest, even if you become lovers. When an ENTP is ready to commit to you trust me, he will let you know and never let go, but not a minute before.
    Very true. I think it works because INFJ's give us space yet hold us close.

    I definitely think it's about maturity. As a mature INFJ, it's become much easier for me to give people the space to be who they are without feeling like I'm sacrificing or surrendering a part of myself in the process. When I was younger, I wore my heart on my sleeve for almost anyone and, naturally, got stomped on. A mature ENTP is more likely to have spent a lot of time chasing both women and his own projects and maybe even be searching for something more. He may be more ready to take and cherish what you have to give him.
    "The fool who persists in his folly will become wise." - William Blake

    That said, there is a lot about this that is individual. My sister, an INFJ, is dating an INTP. As far as I can see, they are seriously, deeply in love, but they have broken up and gotten back together *so many times* and well...there's nothing in her life that's not high drama. I've introduced her to MBTI and it seems to have helped them both a bit, but I think she just lives in an even higher key than I do (and I live in a higher key than most). I think she might be too easily hurt if she tried dating an ENTP.
    Typology renders the complex too simple sometimes. It is important to remember that things depend largely on the individual. Helpful to remember.

    But anyway, INFJs (especially the ladies), we need to be better at protecting our hearts and not giving them freely until someone has really built us a safe space for them in their own hearts. Just because we are so willing to give does not mean everyone is equally able to respect, understand, and protect the gift.
    Good metaphor.

    Long and short of it is I think I am going to keep loving ENTPs for the rest of my life. Hope I can marry one!
    Good luck finding the right person whoever it is and whatever type they may be! I am sure you will. You sound very solid.
    "Create like a god, command like a king, work like a slave."

  3. #223
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cypocalypse View Post
    Is there a big dispcrepancy between an INFJ and an ENFJ?

    I have one really close ENFJ friend (most of what I can triangulate about INFJs come from her, really, since the one INFJ girl I know, I don't know much).

    About feeling neglected by an ENTP...

    Compared to the sophistication of an ENFJ's social life and an ENTP's various line of interest, I think that if I'd ever be with an ENFJ, I'd feel neglected. Really.

    Would there be complete turnaround if the girl's an INFJ instead? Just wondering.
    INFJs often feel neglected by ENTPs. ENTPs feel neglected sometimes by ENFJs (or at least I have). Does that mean that an INFJ would feel really really neglected by an ENFJ?
    "Excellence is the result of caring more than others think is wise, risking more than others think is safe, dreaming more than others think is practical and expecting more than others think is possible." - Mac Anderson

  4. #224
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    I never have.

  5. #225
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    Quote Originally Posted by aphrodite-gone-awry View Post
    Many INFJs partake in extramarital affairs or open relationships all the time, despite their Fe. Jung himself had many relationships with other women even though he was married and his wife knew, but didn't necessarily approve or like it. (i read he even had one of his intimate colleagues over for dinner every sunday!) Sometimes I do think it is related to immaturity if another spouse is involved (on the other end). Most INFJs that I know of who have extra lovers are in a relationship themselves (with some 'understanding') and see single people.
    Jung is most often typed INTP. He typed himself as dominant introverted thinking if I recall correctly, so his Fe would be inferior, not the same animal as in the INFJ at all.

  6. #226
    Senior Member lunalove's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by abyssinia View Post
    I haven't had a chance to read the whole thread, but I just want to put in a good word for ENTPs! When I was younger, I was hurt by a few of them, but I've learned that, at least for me, they are the people that I can have the deepest most passionate connection with (for whatever reason) and the feeling of balance is...extraordinary. There are down sides, of course, but I've come to be able to recognize ENTPs immediately and have made several of them, along with their INTP cousins, my very good friends.

    I think the thing an INFJ needs to remember is that ENTPs are *very different* than you are. Their initial flightiness or unwillingness to commit does not mean they are not capable of very committed, passionate, loving relationships. The trick really is to not jump at initial signs of interest, even if you become lovers. When an ENTP is ready to commit to you trust me, he will let you know and never let go, but not a minute before.

    I definitely think it's about maturity. As a mature INFJ, it's become much easier for me to give people the space to be who they are without feeling like I'm sacrificing or surrendering a part of myself in the process. When I was younger, I wore my heart on my sleeve for almost anyone and, naturally, got stomped on. A mature ENTP is more likely to have spent a lot of time chasing both women and his own projects and maybe even be searching for something more. He may be more ready to take and cherish what you have to give him.

    That said, there is a lot about this that is individual. My sister, an INFJ, is dating an INTP. As far as I can see, they are seriously, deeply in love, but they have broken up and gotten back together *so many times* and well...there's nothing in her life that's not high drama. I've introduced her to MBTI and it seems to have helped them both a bit, but I think she just lives in an even higher key than I do (and I live in a higher key than most). I think she might be too easily hurt if she tried dating an ENTP.

    But anyway, INFJs (especially the ladies), we need to be better at protecting our hearts and not giving them freely until someone has really built us a safe space for them in their own hearts. Just because we are so willing to give does not mean everyone is equally able to respect, understand, and protect the gift.

    Long and short of it is I think I am going to keep loving ENTPs for the rest of my life. Hope I can marry one!
    I think you have a beautiful soul. You sound forgiving, caring, intelligent, and pure! :-) Yes, you should take good care of your gentle soul...and keep loving everyone (including you!)...your love is powerful!! :-) Thank for sharing with us!! luna~

  7. #227
    Once Was Synarch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by heart View Post
    Jung is most often typed INTP. He typed himself as dominant introverted thinking if I recall correctly, so his Fe would be inferior, not the same animal as in the INFJ at all.
    Yeah, I agree. He seems pretty extreme and egotistical in his letters. Actually, if you are a fan of Jung I do not recommend reading his letters. He sounds like a paranoid, angry looney tune.
    "Create like a god, command like a king, work like a slave."

  8. #228
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Synarch View Post
    He sounds like a paranoid, angry looney tune.
    Aren't we all....

  9. #229
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    Quote Originally Posted by Synarch View Post
    Yeah, I agree. He seems pretty extreme and egotistical in his letters. Actually, if you are a fan of Jung I do not recommend reading his letters. He sounds like a paranoid, angry looney tune.
    But it's the contradictions and little hypocrisies that make people so interesting. Jung is no different.

  10. #230
    Babylon Candle Venom's Avatar
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    oh god, not ANOTHER one of these goddamn INFJ/ENTP love fest threads!!!


    we get it. you guys are the most special, weirdest and misunderstood types on the planet, and unless you guys are allowed to have the "romance novel-esque" connection, love itself will simply not exist......

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