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  1. #181
    Senior Member Nameless's Avatar
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    Okay, I've always been kind of confused about this...if you read all of the ENFP profiles (or those of any type) they always say your "match" is your opposite...ISTJ, or whatever. But I never find myself attracted to my complete opposite...it's more like the NF-NT thing...

    So why do personality profiles suggest that you go find your opposite type? Is that for a team-based matchup, like that way you have everything covered and make up for the other person's weaknesses? They don't mean that complete opposites make good friends/relationships, do they?

  2. #182
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    Actually our match is the INTJ...the Mastermind. We need to share that intuition so we don't drive each other mad.
    Friends don't let friends park; accidents cause people.

  3. #183
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nameless View Post
    Okay, I've always been kind of confused about this...if you read all of the ENFP profiles (or those of any type) they always say your "match" is your opposite...ISTJ, or whatever. But I never find myself attracted to my complete opposite...it's more like the NF-NT thing...

    So why do personality profiles suggest that you go find your opposite type? Is that for a team-based matchup, like that way you have everything covered and make up for the other person's weaknesses? They don't mean that complete opposites make good friends/relationships, do they?
    I know I can't really relate at all to my complete opposite. It's like speaking another language. I would think you'd have to have someone that you felt understood you in order to be happy. At least I have to.

  4. #184
    Senior Member Apollonian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tophsquatch View Post
    Actually our match is the INTJ...the Mastermind. We need to share that intuition so we don't drive each other mad.
    *LAUGH* ... irony. Though it is likely the case that an ESFP would be far more annoying than an ENFP, ENFPs sharing intuition have the benefit of being able to develop a close kinship with the INTJ before undermining his phlegmatic peace of mind with random spontaneous insanity.

    (Please note I am being satirical rather than literal and the above statements may not be representative of you.)

    I would enjoy some more ENFP friends, but I am not sure I can ever imagine dating one successfully. ESFPs would be even worse, in my opinion, so I simply think that "those websites" which proclaim the opposites-attract theory are simply wrong or at the very least overgeneralizing.

  5. #185
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    Quote Originally Posted by Apollonian View Post
    *LAUGH* ... irony.
    I would enjoy some more ENFP friends, but I am not sure I can ever imagine dating one successfully. ESFPs would be even worse, in my opinion, so I simply think that "those websites" which proclaim the opposites-attract theory are simply wrong or at the very least overgeneralizing.
    There's a communication that the eN provides; namely we both communicate ideas, and abstractly at that...strangely enough, we intuitvely understand each other...even if the ideas we discuss come from two completely different sources (ENFP- Diplomacy; People and Emotion, INTJ- "Techie Stuff" or as I like to call it "everything else").

    ENFPs are natural dipomats...yes we're crazy, but we control it more around you because you calm us and we can feel your mood. You, on the other hand, begin to enjoy our spontaneity and see that it doesn't undermind your "phlegmatic peace of mind" because we know you desire that "bubble" to maintain your sanity, so we don't try to invade it (we can read you from afar, so we don't need to). This is speaking very generally of course, but it's got a ring of truth to it.

    Of course, immaturity, on our part, or yours will not speak greatly toward unity of any sort.

    I got all of this from "Please Understand Me, II" by Dr. David Keirsley; he wrote the book based on Jung's, Isabella Myers' and her daughter Dr. Briggs' research. There was also a bit of "The Pygmalion Project, Vol. 3; Idealists" thrown in there...though I forget the author.

    Please, let me know if you have any further insights Apollonian; I'd love to be proven wrong here. When I first learned my mate was an INTJ, I had the exact reaction you did.
    Friends don't let friends park; accidents cause people.

  6. #186
    Resident Snot-Nose GZA's Avatar
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    I think the websites that theorize romance are not to be taken seriously. Not only because they are likely wrong due to the infinite number of variables in each person and how they interact with others, but also because it would be criminal to take such a beautiful thing like romance and ruin it with theory and systems. Bleh!

  7. #187
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    Quote Originally Posted by GZA View Post
    I think the websites that theorize romance are not to be taken seriously. Not only because they are likely wrong due to the infinite number of variables in each person and how they interact with others, but also because it would be criminal to take such a beautiful thing like romance and ruin it with theory and systems. Bleh!
    Romance can be analyzed, theorized, even predictied with a surprising amount of accuracy. In any event, romance should be open to analysis as everything else in this universe.

  8. #188
    Senior Member alcea rosea's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GZA View Post
    I think the websites that theorize romance are not to be taken seriously. Not only because they are likely wrong due to the infinite number of variables in each person and how they interact with others, but also because it would be criminal to take such a beautiful thing like romance and ruin it with theory and systems. Bleh!
    I agree. Beautifully described.

    The other thing with the type matching theories is that by believing it 100% you limit down your options dramatically.

  9. #189
    Member cheap's Avatar
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    And such an NT and (concurring) NF response to GZA's post too. I don't really buy into the theory either, and I definitely don't want knowledge of type to influence any kind of biased early dismissal or clouding of fair judgement of a potential *gold* mate.

  10. #190
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    I go by the creedo that "maturity conquers difference", but truthfully I do believe that there are types that will do better together (generally) than others; it'll be an easier process of maturing together is what I'm saying and a more interesting one.
    Friends don't let friends park; accidents cause people.

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