Does anyone else find this?
In a nutshell, due to what people perceive as my easy-going personality (which I would say is a combination of a genuinely easy-going personality, and a somewhat unhealthy ability/habit of keeping all my frustration and annoyance inside and most preserving a calm exterior), I get along extremely well with almost everyone almost all the time. There may be relatively few people Iím very close to (though there are some), but whether youíre a work colleague, or some other casual acquaintance, or a casual friend, or a very close friend Ė it is more than likely that you and I have never had a major disagreement or friction, or if we have, itís really been pretty mild and hasnít lasted long at all.
Now for the backfiring part. I feel like because things are so smooth most of the time, when someone IS annoyed with me, or when someoneís really hurt me, or I have a major disagreement with someone Ė it destroys me and it may very well destroy the relationship. I am the opposite of people who say ďbecause I have a volatile temper [or because my friends and I all have very different and strong opinions, or whatever], Iíve had many big blow-ups with my friends over the years, and sometimes weíve stopped speaking to each other for extended periods of time, but in the end itís always resolved and weíre the best of friends again.Ē I feel that with rare exceptions, if that sort of thing happens (which of course it very seldom does), the relationship may have no chance of recovering. I'm not talking about minor things, because I really do let those go - sometimes even a little too much!
Am I making sense? I guess Iím saying that since there isnít usually much conflict in my life, when there is, I take it even more seriously than I should and get so scared and angry and upset that I may just want to stay out of the other personís way for the rest of my life.
Anyone else find this? How do you deal with it?