[INFP] how an infp is perceived by the general public...

[Saslou]

How i see INFP's -

Spaced out
Intelligent
Caring but so reserved
Weird but in a cool way
Dry humour
Out of place
Sometimes preachy
Seriously miss the trees sometimes

I am trying to understand you guys better.

So many of them don't seem to realise that I not interested in morale debate, and try to engage me in some issues that is important them, but tedious to me. If they feel the need to discuse such things, then fair enough, but I do wish that they would choose their target audience a bit more carefully, i.e. someone else.

Lol .. I do understand what you mean about the moral debate. I don't mind at all having that debate, it becomes an issue for me when it is being forced down my neck and they are not open to other ideas. Instantly dismissed even if it does hold some ground. I don't know, maybe only one person is allowed to have the great ideas.

 

[The Outsider]

I hate moral debates myself. I usually just go along with what the other person says, as it doesn't matter to me. I don't like making huge issues out of nothing.

 

[Andy]

Haha, personally I'm not offended by this (no one can be interesting to everyone) although I'm sorry your INFP friends bore you. I have often wondered how INTJs feel about having their tertiary Fi engaged in conversation. I don't usually do the whole moral debate thing, but I do often communicate with IxTJs at the level of Fi by talking to them about their deep personal emotions/experiences and sharing my own. Communicating with my tertiary Si gets tiring pretty quickly, so I can see how this would wear on an IxTJ ... although my IxTJ friends never seem bored by it ... hmm ... maybe I can't read people as well as I think.

Engage an INTJs Fi in conversation? That is a difficult task. Not because our feelings don't exist (they do, of course, regardless of what some people might think) but rather that we tend to be extremely private people. I certainly am. It is very rare that I decide to share my inner feelings with anyone, and when I do there are only a select few I would do it with. Possibly just the one in fact. Anyone else who tries is likely to get brick walled, presented with a fasade of surface details to satisfy their curiosity without really telling them anything at all.

 

[Ally9224]

Sometimes preachy

Haha I like that. My INFP S.O. is very passionate and goes off in a rant at times. I love it. It's so cute

 

[Saslou]

Haha I like that. My INFP S.O. is very passionate and goes off in a rant at times. I love it. It's so cute

Ahhhh .. The passionate rant .. Oh yeah. It is funny/cute when you are observing it yet not partaking in the discussion yourself. I'm just unable to take it seriously but it is cute. Lol

It is sad though from what i have observed that you see the fire, passion and <Insert strong emotion here> yet this array of emotion, from what i have seen is only mostly demonstrated when in rant mode. They seem more alive at that point. Not to say they are not alive at any other time but it is nice to see something other than reserved and quiet

 

[Sizzling Berry]

Whatever you say!!! Patients I work with seem to love me .

But I have a question - have you taken into consideration that INFPs tend to behave in a different way in a group and in a 1 to 1 situation? I've noticed that reactions to us hugely differ depending on the circumstances we interact in - say if somebody has ever had a private conversation with us.

And about your ISFJ friend - weird in a not pleasant way - talking about judgemental... And INFPs are always the ones to worry if they aren't so.

 

[Ally9224]

Ahhhh .. The passionate rant .. Oh yeah. It is funny/cute when you are observing it yet not partaking in the discussion yourself. I'm just unable to take it seriously but it is cute. Lol

Lol yes, at the beginning of our relationship she hated when I would rationally and objectively respond to her rant (i would ask questions for clarification because often her thoughts are all over the place when she's in rant mode) and it would make her angry because to her it came off as if I was disregarding her emotion. But really, i've always admired her passion and wanted to partake in a discussion. Now, Im more in touch with my Fi and i've learned (somewhat) how to put more emotion into an objective response. And other times I don't say anything because she only wants to vent but I've had a hard time differentiating between the two. =]

It is sad though from what i have observed that you see the fire, passion and <Insert strong emotion here> yet this array of emotion, from what i have seen is only mostly demonstrated when in rant mode. They seem more alive at that point. Not to say they are not alive at any other time but it is nice to see something other than reserved and quiet

This is true but I think that once an INFP gets to trusting you, you get to see this more often and not just in rant mode.

 

[OrangeAppled]

Haha I like that. My INFP S.O. is very passionate and goes off in a rant at times. I love it. It's so cute

Oh, I do rants if I'm among people I feel close to ; that's just a way of venting when my idealistic side is frustrated with the realities of the world....but I don't corner people into moral debates; that's way too confrontational, so I'm unlikely to initiate a discussion like that.

 

[Eckhart]

Haha I like that. My INFP S.O. is very passionate and goes off in a rant at times. I love it. It's so cute

So THAT's why people so often seemed amused to see me ranting

 

[Ally9224]

So THAT's why people so often seemed amused to see me ranting

I'm amazed at how quickly you INFPs can shift your moods. I'll be having a laid back discussion with my INFP and once I hit one of her values she goes in full rant mode. Lol, sometimes she'll be like "well, i dunno where that came from. But do you understand what I'm saying?"

<33 INFPs

 

[Snuggletron]

what do you people think our values are?

G-spots?

 

[Ally9224]

what do you people think our values are?

G-spots?

Only if I'm purposefully trying to set you off?

Heh.

EDIT: Not quite, G-spot = pleasure, pleasure, pleasure. Making an INFP angry? not so much.

 

[Parrish]

I hear laid-back a lot, also independent, too serious, childish (haha, such a paradox), nice when I want to be. And my grandma keeps asking me why I`m sad/angry when I really wasn`t. A female friend described me as a "laid-back-independent-cool-hippie chick." I`m so NOT cool, haha If she meant it in the body-temperature-way, then yes, yes I am.
I didn`t get the intimidating yet.

Weird was also used to describe me previously. It was usually meant in a good way, I think. An EXFP-ex-something told me once that he knows I know I`m weird and that I like it. I do

 

[nogracejane]

Well I usually get the idea that others (high school) find me "smiley", nice, innocent, harmless (haha...), and easy to approach. I probably have an image of a push-over as well. I'm really quiet in class and generally shy. I'm probably socially awkward.

Some SJ's probably find me boring or lethargic, but I just shrug them off. Friends are usually surprised if say something "not so innocently" or even the fact that I listen to screamo. Oh, and I get that "sad" image too.

 

[Seymour]

Came up in conversation at work today that people who don't know me think I'm "aloof." That always surprises me to hear, since I don't feel aloof.

I've also gotten (from people who don't know me well): shy, quiet, innocent, wise, sweet, intimidating, calm

Mostly I think being on the quiet side before one gets to know people provides a blank slate for plenty of projection. Add in a little NFP spaciness/wierdness and it's almost a Rorschach test.

 

[chris1207]

I've had limited experience with most types, including INFPs, but that that I've had has been quite pleasant. There's something so sexy about the female INFP's I've known. The fact that they're misunderstood makes them seem vulnerable and, as an ENFJ, I have a hero complex. I like the idea of protecting their feelings and destroying their enemies!

 

[OrangeAppled]

I've had limited experience with most types, including INFPs, but that that I've had has been quite pleasant. There's something so sexy about the female INFP's I've known. The fact that they're misunderstood makes them seem vulnerable and, as an ENFJ, I have a hero complex. I like the idea of protecting their feelings and destroying their enemies!

What I love about ENFJs is almost every single one I have ever met never misinterprets my shyness as being aloof or unfriendly. It's very refreshing to have people assume a positive over a negative.

 

[purplesunset]

I've had limited experience with most types, including INFPs, but that that I've had has been quite pleasant. There's something so sexy about the female INFP's I've known. The fact that they're misunderstood makes them seem vulnerable and, as an ENFJ, I have a hero complex. I like the idea of protecting their feelings and destroying their enemies!

Dude, are you a masochist?

If you go into hero mode with an INFP female, you're basically writing your own death wish. Well, this applies to NF females in general, but especially with INFP females.

What will happen is this:

You will be smitten by her sweetness and vulnerability.

You will then go into ENFJ hero mode and want to protect her. She falls hard in love with you, while constantly pointing out her flaws because of her vulnerability which you mentioned above.

As she starts to trust you, she will dump all her deep rooted emotional problems unto your bosom. Until one day, she will reflect on it, and start to feel a bit too vulnerable from baring herself so much to someone else. And perhaps even a bit ashamed at baring so much of herself to another person.

Then the resentment will slowly begin. In order to not feel so vulnerable/ashamed anymore, she will start to close up to you, until she eventually just dumps you, and walks away, leaving all her baggage behind in your heart. You will be left with all the emotional mess she had previously confided to you.

This mess is comparable to a broken vase, but even if you do repair the broken vase, there is no owner to return it to, because she's already moved on to give another broken vase to some other unfortunate bloke.

That my friend, is the story of the ENFJ hero, and the INFP damsel in distress.

 

[OrangeAppled]

Dude, are you a masochist?

If you go into hero mode with an INFP female, you're basically writing your own death wish. Well, this applies to NF females in general, but especially with INFP females.

What will happen is this:

You will be smitten by her sweetness and vulnerability.

You will then go into ENFJ hero mode and want to protect her. She falls hard in love with you, while constantly pointing out her flaws because of her vulnerability which you mentioned above.

As she starts to trust you, she will dump all her deep rooted emotional problems unto your bosom. Until one day, she will reflect on it, and start to feel a bit too vulnerable from baring herself so much to someone else. And perhaps even a bit ashamed at baring so much of herself to another person.

Then the resentment will slowly begin. In order to not feel so vulnerable/ashamed anymore, she will start to close up to you, until she eventually just dumps you, and walks away, leaving all her baggage behind in your heart. You will be left with all the emotional mess she had previously confided to you.

This mess is comparable to a broken vase, but even if you do repair the broken vase, there is no owner to return it to, because she's already moved on to give another broken vase to some other unfortunate bloke.

That my friend, is the story of the ENFJ hero, and the INFP damsel in distress.

I think this only happens if the ENFJ does not confide in the INFP also. One-way confiding can feel vulnerable and create resentment, but where there is a mutual sharing of feelings and mutual support, trust and closeness may result.

Of course, no one wants to be "saved" so much as supported while they become their own hero. Being "saved" may seem nice in fantasy, but I admit it would probably feel patronizing, and it would inevitably be disappointing for both involved.

Oh, and this also assumes the female INFP has "baggage". While everyone has their flaws, I don't think all INFPs are so flawed they go dumping on their SO in every relationship. Maybe the ones who seek being "saved" do that, but I don't think that's type-related.

 

[Southern Kross]

Yeah, I don't think I tend to come off well in general. I don't seem to know how to sell myself . I think there are mainly 2 ways I am perceived depending on how well people know me:

Early impressions: dull, awkward, unsociable, harmless, ditzy, shy, goody-two-shoes, weird

Later impressions: laid-back, absent-minded, nice, talkative, withdrawn/solitary, intense, nerdy, overthinks everything, weird

Needless to say, my close friends and family tend to realize that there's more to me than the above. The early impressions really bug me because they often put people off me and I feel helpless to change their perceptions. I especially hate when I seem dull and ditzy