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  1. #21
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sandy View Post
    OH! I forgot! ONCE, I left the house early one morning to go to a staff meeting; I was aghast when one of my male colleagues started laughing out loud, POINTING AT MY SHOES... I had inadvertently worn one black and one navy blue pump! I was livid! :blushing: I played it off well and laughed at myself! (I did this one other time, but at church!!! This time, it was one pointed toe and one rounded toe black pump -- it was awful! ) *thud*

    At one time, I had reasoned that since my feet are so small (size 5.5), it's hard to find shoes that can fit correctly. So when I found a good pair of shoes that I liked, I got a pair of each color that I could find. Never again... those dark shoes all look the same underneath the bed in a dark room. :rolli:
    Hah! That's nothing! I once wore a white tennie and a brown loafer to pick up my kids from school. And I always park and go up to the playground to collect them so I know somebody had to have noticed. Nobody said anything about it, though.

    I also once wore burgundy panties under white knit skirt to church on a day I couldn't find my slip. I was so lucky that I'd brought some pants to change into after service or I would have been stuck like that for both services.

    Quote Originally Posted by wolfmaiden14 View Post
    A-freaking-men!! Now, this may only be the first time it's hit me, but I can see it needing to happen over and over, and that's why I can't even seem to climb out this first time. Seems pointless.


    Let's face it.. society, especially American, just isn't fit for NFs. How can service-oriented types thrive within a capitalistic culture that pretty much forces you to screw over others or "beat the system" to get ahead? Not to mention teaches you not to trust anybody.. even though we want to love them. ><
    Ugh! Yes! I also hate the reality distortion field that seems to surround most organizations and institutions. They tell you completely bogus things and even get all morally superior on you about it. I'll be just standing there wondering if they actually believe the BS that is falling out of their mouth or if they think I'm a complete moron and wondering if so many people buy it that they never question it themselves. It's so frustrating! I can't even pretend to play along anymore.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  2. #22
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    Mismatched shoes and sox! ISTJ fathers! Bumping into things! Dissatifaction with Jobs! What to reply to??

    I solved the shoe problem by finding one Sears style that I like and just wearing them until the heel comes off. Then I go back and buy another pair - 10 minutes and I'm outa there. The problem now is that they seem to have discontinued this particular style ("Trudy" - sad .. I even know the name). Not that that solves the problem completely ... I still arrive at work with muddy dog paw prints on them. And then there's the dog / cat hair on my clothes.... It's not that I don't like looking good, it's just so exhausting (+expensive, time-consuming, depressing) getting there. Beauty, according to public opinion, at least, sure comes at a creative price.

    I don't think the Jobs thing is off topic at all, it's just that it is so huge I didn't mention it. It's my chronic bane, my everpresent thorn in the side. Either I'm overwhelmed or bored to tears or frustrated with the bureaucracy. Capitalistic culture may suck, but at least you know what you're dealing with and there is some degree of a modern creative progress ... Try changing a university system where the power is entrenched vertically and horizontally and there are hidden agendas at every turn! {sigh}

    Part of the career problem is my aforementioned wrong choice of career in college that I continued to follow even after I knew it was wrong for me. Now it's really hard to turn the Titanic around.

    I look back and was horrified that I actually went to business school and studied Hotel/Restaurant management (very ESxJ/P-like). I used to think it was because I loved to cook, but actually, other than occasional creative endeavors, I detest the daily grind of cooking. And that isn't just from scratch-stuff. I hate the cutting, chopping, washing of putting salads together, even though I enjoy eating them.

    ISTJ Fathers .. a whole topic in itself ... I finally started getting along with him when I learned about Type. I remember one time storming off in tears after he obsessively insisted I look at the map and go a particular route to a nearby city (and no, he wasn't even going along). Later on I learned to politely listen in a very agreeable manner, then go my own way.

    Whew.... this feels great to know I'm not so alone. Thanks for the vent!
    Be a Columbus
    to whole new continents
    and worlds within you,
    opening new channels,
    not of trade,
    but of thought.

    -Henry David Thoreau, naturalist and author (1817-1862)

  3. #23
    On a mission Usehername's Avatar
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    I used to have a lot of trouble with this stuff. As a teenager, I was absorbed in my INxJ world. I wore whatever random articles of clothing females in my family didn't want b/c I didn't go shopping.

    I feel like I've conquered it, though. I can "turn on" my Se for driving, I can consciously dress myself well now (but I'm sure it takes far more thought than most people require).

    But maybe it's just that I'm in university and have minimal responsibilities, no kids, no one to worry about but myself...
    maybe I will backtrack when my life gets more stressful. Because it takes a lot of effort now.

    --
    Actually, on Tuesday I flooded my bathroom b/c I forgot to turn off the cold water tap (I was washing my face and had hot + cold together.)
    Luckily, I noticed before I left home. I was late, but that could've been disastrous. Especially b/c my laptop was on the floor in the carpeted bedroom outside the bathroom.
    *You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
    *Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason once accepted, despite your changing moods.
    C.S. Lewis

  4. #24
    To the top of the world arcticangel02's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by quietgirl View Post
    1. Dates, dates, dates and more dates. What day is it again? I have no idea.
    Yep, I'm pretty bad at that. Whether it's monday or tuesday or whatever isn't so bad, because I usually have distinctive, different things to do on each day, but I'm hopeless with dates. For example, when I'm working, I often have to write out gift cards for people, which expire a year from whenever they buy them. But honestly, omg, I can do 20 of these within an hour and still have to look at the computer to check what the date is when I'm writing out the 21st one. Hopeless!

    Quote Originally Posted by quietgirl View Post
    2. Was the light green? Or red? I honestly had no idea.
    Hah! When I'm driving, I sometimes get almost all the way up to an intersection before my brain registers that there's traffic lights there. They're always green, thankfully (probably red lights would have me notice sooner), but I really wonder how I couldn't even have noticed that I was approaching the lights!

    Although a bit off topic, my ISFP mother always tells me that she's utterly hopeless with remembering details like that - what colour that shirt was, or whether someone was wearing earrings or not.

    Quote Originally Posted by quietgirl View Post
    4. I'm usually unaware of what my body is trying to tell me. I don't eat until I have hunger pains knawing at me, despite the time of day. I literally forget to eat.
    Yeah, this has happened to me. It usually only happens when I'm very occupied with something else, but I once started work at 3pm, and had completely forgotten to eat anything at all that day. Needless to say, that was not a fun shift. Though I don't think I've done that in a few years, now.

    Quote Originally Posted by quietgirl View Post
    5. Directions. I could get lost finding my way out of a paper box.
    Hahaha! I can pretty much guarantee that if I haven't already been somewhere many times (or even if I haven't taken that same route to get to that somewhere), and I don't have a map on hand to consult constantly, I will get lost.

    Quote Originally Posted by wolfmaiden14 View Post
    I hate when I'm looking for something, and I KNOW it's right in front of my face, but I just can't see it!
    Oh yes. My parents (both S) have a hard time believing that me and my brother (both NFs) cannot see the things in front of our eyes. Seriously. I will look for something for ten minutes, then when I finally give up and ask someone else to help me, they'll point to it (or look under the first bit of paper) and go, 'How could you not see that!?'

    Also, I have a horrible memory. I drive my parents nuts with my inability to remember to do normal household chores. I have a grand total of one (1) chore to do each day, and yet probably 5 days of the week I won't do it. Usually because it will quite honestly slip my mind. Even after my father reminding me four or five times to do it, I will usually be occupied with something else and so will 'do it later'. More often than not it never gets done.

    Schoolwork suffers from that, too. Once or twice I've forgotten I had an assignment due (or thought it was due the week afterwards), and the night before when someone mentions it, I'm like OMG. Thankfully I can do without sleep and still function. This skill comes in handy several times a semester. ^^

    But yeah, because my family is mostly Sensors, I have picked up a few small habits which make life easier for everyone involved. I write lists of things to do (so I don't forget), put all my engagements on a calendar that sits right next to my desk so I see it and am constantly reminded (otherwise I would never leave the house because I wouldn't be able to remember when I was supposed to meet people). So at least I'm usually aware of what's going on, even if I don't manage my time particularly well.

    And I am also consistantly tardy. I think I've arrived on time for work maybe a handful of times since I started working there over a year ago. I mean, it's usually only by a few minutes, and I'm always willing to cut the time out of my pay (or stay later), but even so, I'm really lucky I have fairly easygoing bosses. ^^ They tease me, but they don't get angry. Whew!

    Social engagements: you can rely on me to be a half-hour to an hour late. (Depending on how far away it is). But it just happens, somehow.

    Thankfully, I can usually make most people forgive me my absent-mindedness with a smile and some really sincere apologies. Even my parents, who should really be immune to this by now. Or perhaps they just don't expect me to be reliable in the first place.

    I sometimes wonder how I function at all in this Sensor-ish world!
    ANFP:
    Extraversion (52%) ---- Introversion (48%)
    Sensing (26%) ---- iNtuition (74%)
    Thinking (16%) ---- Feeling (84%)
    Judging (5%) ---- Perceiving (95%)

    9w1 so/sx/sp

  5. #25
    Glowy Goopy Goodness The_Liquid_Laser's Avatar
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    Details have always been my downfall. Whenever I'm in a situation where I need to spot a small detail I know that I'm screwed. I do remember one situation where I needed to find a pay phone, so I started up the car and went looking for a gas station. After explaining what I was doing, my wife said, "Why did you leave where we were? There was a pay phone right there."

    The weird thing is that I am very externally oriented, but I still can't see details. I can be very insightful in some ways and totally clueless in others. I see patterns, but not details, so I often miss things that are right in front of my face.
    My wife and I made a game to teach kids about nutrition. Please try our game and vote for us to win. (Voting period: July 14 - August 14)
    http://www.revoltingvegetables.com

  6. #26
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    I recently dropped out of a program because too many external logistics wore me down. Granted I was already in a compromised state, but the content relaxed me while the externals made me completely sick and demoralized. Being judged on externals is the bane of my existence. I'm glad there are people who excel in those areas of keeping track of details and appearances, but I'm not one I prefer not to patronized by them. Si is more alien to me than Se, so perhaps my biggest conflict is with the former.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by Introverts_Unite! View Post

    I look back and was horrified that I actually went to business school and studied Hotel/Restaurant management (very ESxJ/P-like). I used to think it was because I loved to cook, but actually, other than occasional creative endeavors, I detest the daily grind of cooking. And that isn't just from scratch-stuff. I hate the cutting, chopping, washing of putting salads together, even though I enjoy eating them.

    ISTJ Fathers .. a whole topic in itself ... I finally started getting along with him when I learned about Type. I remember one time storming off in tears after he obsessively insisted I look at the map and go a particular route to a nearby city (and no, he wasn't even going along). Later on I learned to politely listen in a very agreeable manner, then go my own way.
    My ISTJ father used to do the same exact thing. He had tons of maps in his car and would give them to me every time I ventured beyond our hometown. He'd also highlight my route. I used to tell him he should work for AAA & he would then get mad that I was joking about my personal safety. When I left home for college at 18, I got a pile of maps of every place I could possibly drive (with the route highlighted of course)

    About Cooking...

    I LOVE to cook, but I more like making new & fun things up. I also enjoy being able to eat exactly what I want to eat. I've considered saying "forget it!" to my job & going back to school and just getting certified at a culinary school but it's nice to see an INFJ's side of the business.

    I also took on management jobs right after college. Did you find the management aspect as draining as I did? What did you dislike about it (and like about it?)

  8. #28
    Senior Member Kyrielle's Avatar
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    Dates. Time of day. Day of the week. (I seriously only ever know what day it is when I have a project going. If I don't, then I start feeling suspended in time.) Even then I'm bad at dates.

    Remembering who said what. Terrible at that. It's not that I don't listen...I just can't remember. However, I will remember the jist of the conversation.

    Directions. I wish I had a sign over my head that said, "If you ask me for directions, I will only mumble a lot, look confused, and waste your time." There are a lot of tourists where I live, and they tend to ask me for directions to go to places I don't recall ever passing (eventhough I might have passed it everyday for the past year). I'm very bad at giving directions since my navigational system doesn't work on street names and stoplights. It works on landmarks that are so subtle people wouldn't understand me. If I could tell them "Turn left at the square where the trees go like this" or "Go straight until you see a small window with a weird bunch of bottles in it", I would.

    Forgetting to eat. Food could be everywhere, and, if I was doing anything interesting, I wouldn't notice it until I felt sick from hunger.

    Not caring if the jacket I wear all the time has several stains on it (from paint and ink and the like...not that you would see it...it's black, but the idea bothers some people). This drives my mother absolutely nuts. As a matter of fact, when I came home for the winter, she went crazy over the idea that I would wear a "dressy" jacket (it's not) everyday. God forbid I let my sleeve touch anything "dangerous".

    Not caring if the surfaces of things are dusty and otherwise covered in work.

    I don't seem to have a problem with mismatched stuff mostly because I have only a few pairs of shoes that are radically different from each other and the clothes I buy, are bought on the assumption I will wear them to death and be able to wear them with everything I own. I get accused by my ESFJ mother of wearing a "uniform" sometimes.

  9. #29
    Junior Member fiona's Avatar
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    Odd. I am INTJ, but driving, because it is logical, isn't a problem. It's the irrational behaviour of other drivers that makes me furious. I'd always assumed that INTJs would generally be good drivers (also because we like to master skills and hate underperforming). Also, many times I have negotiated multiple junctions while deep in thought - sometimes to the point that I have no memory of doing so (though that tends to also occur when I am deeply stressed, as in psychiatrically so). I am also very good at figuring out likely driver behaviour from age, gender and type/age of car. Old men in hats, for instance, will always do whatever is the worst possible manoeuvre as if there is no one else on the road. But I hate it when people drive dangerously, or clearly have no idea of how to indicate on a roundabout, things like that.
    It's not rocket science, it's just driving.
    But I can't remember birthdays either. Mine was yesterday and I nearly forgot it again. If I can't remember mine...

    I am aware of my appearance in a general way, but that's because i'm a) overweight and b) very ugly (b doesn't change if I lose weight, unfortunately). However, probably as a consequence my attention to my appearance is minimal - clean, hair brushed, reasonably colour co-ordinated clothes. But when I was thin I did enjoy trying on clothes - though that may have been the novelty of it.

    I have a cluttered house, but I am aware that the 'if only it was tidy then I'd be able to really achieve stuff' is a procrastination ploy, not a type issue. you can achieve in an untidy environment. Just look at Iris Murdoch.

    I have nearly lost the car, but I can usually work backwards and figure out where I left it. Logic cuts in when my senses fail me.

  10. #30
    Junior Member fiona's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by quietgirl View Post
    My ISTJ father used to do the same exact thing. He had tons of maps in his car and would give them to me every time I ventured beyond our hometown. He'd also highlight my route. I used to tell him he should work for AAA & he would then get mad that I was joking about my personal safety. When I left home for college at 18, I got a pile of maps of every place I could possibly drive (with the route highlighted of course)
    I take it that you saw his behaviour as controlling, not that he was worried?

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