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  1. #21
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    INFJs may be detached and rational, but it's like in this really nice, supportive way if that makes any sense at all. I generally tend to like them a lot.

    A select few I have encountered can be irritatingly "politically correct" like to an ungodly extreme, and that's how they can express Fe while remaining detached instead of actually reaching out to individuals.

  2. #22
    Senior Member INTPness's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nunki View Post
    Lest you think that Fe is all hugs and butterflies, I'll also mention that I can use the process as a weapon, for example, when people reject me. In those and similar cases, I begin to treat people as playthings--I push all their buttons and deliberately make a spectacle of everyone. My goal is to tear everything apart, to go absolutely wild and milk the situation for all it's worth.
    Interesting. I somehow think I've been on the receiving end of this before. My INTP reaction is to simply put the person on "mute". Literally. They can push all the buttons they want, go out of their way to get to me, even smash my car if they want, but they aren't getting any response or reaction from me because they are officially on mute. If the car gets smashed (this hasn't actually happened, just using it as an example), then they'll simply receive a police report and repair invoice in the mail. But, they won't get the "oh my gosh, you smashed my car!" reaction out of me. And it works because the person quickly realizes that they are the one acting out and lashing out - and it's only affecting them, not me. The Fe tirade isn't going to affect my day-to-day happiness.

    It's interesting how we all have our different ways of showing anger or lashing out.

  3. #23
    Badoom~ Skyward's Avatar
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    I personified my functions at one point.

    The setting is a large house/mansion.

    Ni is the Mystic who stares into various dowsing apparatuses and through his telescope to find information from unconventional sources. After years of this study he has been able to see how easily things fit together, even if not in a very obvious or logical way. ((I associate the darnedest things with other things without trying. Ti tries to find connections by researching the topic and finding where things fit together))

    Fe is the Caretaker/Muse. She is the daughter and the student of the Mystic and thus accepts his advice more readily than the other two. As a woman, she is interested in the harmony around her and especially for the guests that come to the house ((People I'm around at the time)). This works out well if she can escape the boisterous Dancer ((Se)). As time goes on, she has had increasing control over the heart of the Dancer, and have been able to sway him to her devices. She rather appreciates the Dancer's ability to entertain guests now that he is listening to her more. Before, he was more of a tyrant.

    Ti, the Lawyer, is either a headache or a blessing. When he and the Mystic begin to bicker nothing is done and it can last for a long time with no winner. Everything the Mystic says is wrong according to the Lawyer, but then again, the Mystic is the head of the house. The Mystic sometimes gets so fed up with the Lawyer that he just shuts the doors and windows, locking everyone out. Thankfully, however, business has been more fruitful as the Lawyer and Mystic have found common ground. With the Lawyer's clarity of thought and understanding of the Mystics cryptic quatrains, he can pass them to the other two.

    Se is the Dancer. He models himself as a nobles son and acts like it. He keeps the beautiful Muse by his side as much as possible and especially when there are guests. He does not allow her to talk much, and he dismisses the advice of the Mystic as frivolous nothings. He always tries to run the mansion, even if the Mystic is the true owner and builder of it. If he isn't running amok, he is finding different ways to make the house more lively, even if the other members aren't interested. The Mystic still decides whether the ideas created by the Dancer are worth implementing.

    ---

    Quote Originally Posted by 21% View Post
    Contrary to how it might seem on the outside, INFJs feel a lot, and very fiercely and deeply. Fe seeks to connect. However, being introverts, INFJs don't have that much energy to do so. I certainly don't. I get exhausted if I get too engaged with people, because I will start to feel too much, and it's overwhelming. The only way to cope is to keep most relationships at a comfortable distance, where I don't have to care too much about them. It may sound selfish, but I only truly care about some (very few) individuals. The rest is kept at the other side of the barrier. It takes a very special person (and a very long time) to get past that barrier.

    But once you're in, you'll be loved to bits
    +1! - Thats a great explanation.

    We may feel a lot, but we do not express it like the puddin' pawsy ENFs. I know INFPs are also fairly cool on the outside, but since their T function is further away from the front, its easier to see them as an F. INFJs are tactical also.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tiltyred View Post
    One reason you don't see the feeling is because I don't like to impose. My strength of feeling might not feel good to you, so I'm sensitive to how much to let out at any given time. You might not be showing all your cards, either -- most people have more going on than they let on -- so my antennae are up all the time. When I get a good solid sense of where you are, then I can show my emotions in some way that won't overwhelm you and that you might enjoy or benefit from. In the meantime, I'm content to own my own and just sit with them. Also I have to give myself time to think about what I get from you, because feeling is synonymous with being for me, and what I have a gut reaction to may or may not be true, so there's always a lag time between what I think and what I say or show. That's in an effort to do service to the relationship, whatever it might be.

    Plus I am really really interested more than anything in who the other person is. So I don't want to do anything to interfere with their true expression. I am more interested in seeing who you are than in you seeing who I am. Or, who I am is someone who wants to see who you are, and I can't look at you if I'm busy drawing attention to myself.
    This post is full of win.

    But for me, I know I myself am a total goofball male, so I crank all my functions into Humor Mode. Ni makes odd connections, Ti explains them to people who don't get it (if I'm lucky enough to have an explanation), Se is just banter and wisecracking like a New Yorker. Fe is just enjoying a feel-good vibes from people having a good time.
    'Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and its better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.' - Marilyn Monroe

    This is who I am, escapist, paradise-seeker.
    -Nightwish

    Anthropology Major out of Hamline University. St. Paul, Minnesota.

  4. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kalach View Post
    Picture this:

    you've entered a strange new realm. You crossed through a portal. Mechanistic solutions to objective problems are no longer separable from immediate affect. When you see a process run inefficiently, it hurts you directly. You suffer along with the grinding gear that slows down the engine, and you sympathise with the wrong turn that couldn't help but make the journey longer. A computer that runs slowly when you just know it could be so much better, is like a knife in your chest. You have become an INFJ of inanimate objects.
    this is really really good

  5. #25
    Junior Member rogue1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by INTPness View Post
    Interesting. I somehow think I've been on the receiving end of this before. My INTP reaction is to simply put the person on "mute". Literally. They can push all the buttons they want, go out of their way to get to me, even smash my car if they want, but they aren't getting any response or reaction from me because they are officially on mute. If the car gets smashed (this hasn't actually happened, just using it as an example), then they'll simply receive a police report and repair invoice in the mail. But, they won't get the "oh my gosh, you smashed my car!" reaction out of me. And it works because the person quickly realizes that they are the one acting out and lashing out - and it's only affecting them, not me. The Fe tirade isn't going to affect my day-to-day happiness.

    It's interesting how we all have our different ways of showing anger or lashing out.
    LOL so that is what that was I was being "muted". Fortunately, I did see that this "mute" time was not going to have a positive outcome for either of us unless I could take a step back and let my emotions calm down. Even though that was kind of a negative encouragement, it still turned out to be a positive growing experience...and an opportunity for me to learn how to better control my Fe.

  6. #26
    Senior Member the state i am in's Avatar
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    describing Fe as only something on the inside suggests undeveloped Fe. it's only a one-way street. this is a combination of many factors, 1) that infjs seem to always be the withdrawn types e4, e5, and e9, and 2) infjs almost always seem to have /sp as one of their predominant instinctual energies.

    Fe lights up, and if you've never seen an infj light up, you're only getting half the story. true most infjs are quite recessed, cautious, anxious, easily embarrassed, etc, but with enough cajoling you can get them out of their shells.

    it's true we spend much time exploring Ni, and in that sense Fe is still in a hypothetical state supported by Ti, more so than it is physically part of our bodies, we may have withdrawn into our own minds almost completely, floating somewhere in the ether. but whenever i am halfway present, people can read my mood quite easily (hence the withdrawing, when negative or unhealthy). this is bc Fe shows its cards when it is active, tangible, and at all open and in-the-moment.

    otherwise Fe is just a pressure closing in all around us. a hyper awareness about the emotional climate, the other surrounding us in all forms and guises, and full of a lot of projections based on our interpretation of events, context, social vibe, etc. this is particularly directed to one of the three withdrawn egos, e4, e5, and e9, which define what Fe is principally used for.

    i was shitty at this, and i still mostly am in larger social situations, but one on one, i can fit the tenor of the interaction very well, show that i recognize the context of the situation, what the other person feels, interpret their body language, verbal language, etc, can anticipate where they are going, clarify what they think, explore and connect with them in a wide variety of ways, adding a breadth of context and meaning along the way (perspective).

    Fe is a great rhetorical skill. it helps us find ways to understand and interpret others, and to craft our own message, communicate in diverse ways, etc. but it needs serious practice. generally speaking, i think entp perspectives on this have been more beneficial for me than anything else.

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