User Tag List

123 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 57

Thread: INFP + INFP

  1. #1
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Posts
    669

    Default INFP + INFP

    Is it common for INFP's to be attracted to other INFP's romantically? I have never, ever in my life been attracted to another INFP in terms of any sort of relationship, though I am very attracted to INFP's as friends, since we connect very well.

    I think two INFP's together would, more often than not, be a disaster, and I can't see how any two INFP's could be interested in each other romantically if they are so much alike. (Unless, maybe one or both was not a strong INFP and more balanced toward the middle.)

    Thoughts? Have you ever known two INFP's to be attracted in more than a 'good friends' capacity?
    I-71%, N-80%, F-74%, P-96%

  2. #2
    Senior Member Eckhart's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    ???
    Socionics
    ????
    Posts
    1,097

    Default

    There is this one person. I am not sure about her type to 100%. Sometimes I think she is more extroverted (and all my other introverted friends would sure say so too), but then I also see enough indications of introvertedness, especially when being with other extroverted people or in bigger groups. Heard often enough that less introverted people keep up the "entertaining" part among other introverted people and so seem extroverted (can see it on my self sometimes even), I think it is the same here. I tend to say it is INFP.

    Yeah, I totally fell in love to her, hopelessly lost. And I still am, although I know already for long there is no really realistic chance anymore that something more will happen out of it. Still being some kind of friends though, probably would be much more close if I hadn't messed up things by being so damn passive, since she made enough approaches of at least a closer friendship in the beginning.

    A disaster however it never was.

  3. #3
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    4w5 sp/sx
    Socionics
    IEI Ni
    Posts
    7,661

    Default

    When INFP globalchatter was around, a lot of INFPs expressed that they felt another INFP would be their ideal match. However, that was in theory, as many did not know any other INFPs to date.

    I've personally met only one INFP guy (he tested INFP anyway), and we did not mesh in person. I think we both found each other dull, despite many shared interests. He struck me as self-absorbed and thoughtless, but that may be an age/maturity thing (he was several years younger than me).

    Online, most of the INFP guys I've talked to give me a friend vibe. I could see us being buddies, but romance seems unlikely.

    I talked to this guy briefly when I was younger, and he may have been INFP, but it's hard to say for sure. I rather liked him, but we were both too painfully shy and it seemed like we both stalled at the starting line. There was some post on this board where the person compared two INFPs to two cars at a intersection with no light; each keeps waiting for the other to go first . I thought that sounded pretty accurate.
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

  4. #4
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    MBTI
    INFP
    Posts
    256

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Eckhart View Post
    There is this one person. I am not sure about her type to 100%. Sometimes I think she is more extroverted (and all my other introverted friends would sure say so too), but then I also see enough indications of introvertedness, especially when being with other extroverted people or in bigger groups. Heard often enough that less introverted people keep up the "entertaining" part among other introverted people and so seem extroverted (can see it on my self sometimes even), I think it is the same here. I tend to say it is INFP.

    Yeah, I totally fell in love to her, hopelessly lost. And I still am, although I know already for long there is no really realistic chance anymore that something more will happen out of it. Still being some kind of friends though, probably would be much more close if I hadn't messed up things by being so damn passive, since she made enough approaches of at least a closer friendship in the beginning.

    A disaster however it never was.
    Ekhart, it may not be too late. If it's one thing I've come to learn is that things change in romantic situations. Sometimes they don't die but are fermenting. She may still be open to you approaching her for a romantic relationship. As you say, it's not been a disaster of any kind, so that's good. And, you're still in love with her. She may still have those feelings for you.

    As for another INFP, I think my friend is an INFP or INFJ, I haven't decided yet. For that matter, he may be an E but I don't think so as he becomes animated for a while but then closes down (like me). Personally, I love the understanding with another INFP. I won't ever get involved with another ST or SP again---there's too much work with too little reward. I'm very intuitive and need someone who is intuitive as well. Otherwise, communication can be a challenge as they don't understand where I'm coming from and I grow tired of explaining. Of course, there are always exceptions, that's just my personal experience and feeling at this point.
    Last edited by Lauren; 01-19-2010 at 09:42 AM. Reason: Edited to say "INFJ"

  5. #5
    Reptilian Snuggletron's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    10
    Posts
    2,233

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post
    There was some post on this board where the person compared two INFPs to two cars at a intersection with no light; each keeps waiting for the other to go first . I thought that sounded pretty accurate.

  6. #6
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Posts
    669

    Default

    Eckhart, I agree with Lauren! You should pursue it and see what happens. Maybe you'll be the first INFP + INFP success story I've heard!
    I-71%, N-80%, F-74%, P-96%

  7. #7
    jump sleuthiness's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    54 so/sp
    Socionics
    IEI Ni
    Posts
    1,860

    Default

    I don't know if this thread topic is asking a question that hasn't been asked on this forum dozens of times before.

    Regardless, I'm finding myself becoming slowly infatuated with an infp woman who works as a librarian. She has pretty much everything I'm looking for: decent amount of ambition, good balance of humor and realism, charm, grace, and a shrewd intellect (she's always, always reading between the lines, which can be both cute and annoying at times - like giving a kitten a ball of yarn to paw around). Above all, I love her inherent kind/tenderness. Conversations tend to stretch and stretch and stretch, bouncing from enthusiasm to anger to joy again, all within one talk. We might start the morning by playfully kicking/pushing each other around on the couch or reading enneagram material and arguing about it to whatever. It's getting to the point where I'm sifting through every possible scenario that'll get us moving in the right direction, because I want (approaching "need") her in my future.

    thinking of you

  8. #8
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Posts
    669

    Default

    Candylandjoe, that's really sweet.

    (I did search for similar threads before I posted this, but I didn't really come up with much. If this is a duplicate, I'd be happy for someone to give us a link to what's already been discussed.)
    I-71%, N-80%, F-74%, P-96%

  9. #9
    /X\(:: :: )/X\ BlueSprout's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    pfni
    Enneagram
    4
    Posts
    571

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post
    When INFP globalchatter was around, a lot of INFPs expressed that they felt another INFP would be their ideal match. However, that was in theory, as many did not know any other INFPs to date.

    I've personally met only one INFP guy (he tested INFP anyway), and we did not mesh in person. I think we both found each other dull, despite many shared interests. He struck me as self-absorbed and thoughtless, but that may be an age/maturity thing (he was several years younger than me).

    Online, most of the INFP guys I've talked to give me a friend vibe. I could see us being buddies, but romance seems unlikely.

    I talked to this guy briefly when I was younger, and he may have been INFP, but it's hard to say for sure. I rather liked him, but we were both too painfully shy and it seemed like we both stalled at the starting line. There was some post on this board where the person compared two INFPs to two cars at a intersection with no light; each keeps waiting for the other to go first . I thought that sounded pretty accurate.
    Like some of the GC posters, theoretically at least, I can't see myself with a non-INFP. It probably just means I'm not ready for a relationship, though. On one hand, another INFP just seems like an easier fit to the way I approach and live my life. He/she wouldn't force me to be far more outgoing, active, goal oriented or disciplined than I already am. On the other hand, that lack of conflict has little bearing on the values and interests that I would also like to share with a SO.

    I totally relate to a lot of what you've experienced and concluded. Unfortunately, I find the few other INFPs I know pretty unstimulating sometimes. I definitely don't experience raw attraction with them, either. The cars passing at an intersection with no light analogy really makes sense to me as well. The first move would have to be made by the other person 9 times out of 10 - and I assume that other INFPs often have just as many reservations about putting themselves out there as I do.
    Type: INFP Enneagram: 4
    Fi>Si>Ne>Te>Fe>Se>Ti>Ni

    °cataplum!

  10. #10
    Senior Member Eckhart's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    ???
    Socionics
    ????
    Posts
    1,097

    Default

    @Lauren / Wiley: That's really nice words you give me, thank you. But well, she is already in a relationship with some guy, and we don't hear very much anymore from each other. I only know that she has not totally forgotten me and probably she would see me as a friend still, but I guess she surrendered (may it be for a close friendship or really a romantic relationship, I don't know exactly, she never said me) on me already, which I can understand. The most important thing for me anyway is that she is happy, whether it is with me or with someone else, even though it hurts me that she is with another.

    But well, I will still look how it goes, what else is there left for me, since I never felt like that for any other person.

Similar Threads

  1. [INFP] Questions for and about INFPs.
    By Cindyrella in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 233
    Last Post: 12-06-2017, 11:56 PM
  2. [INFP] An INFP's Dilemma or Just Mine?
    By Meursault in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 51
    Last Post: 05-23-2016, 03:30 PM
  3. [INFP] INFPs, is that you?
    By Tayshaun in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 48
    Last Post: 06-14-2015, 07:52 PM
  4. [INFP] Questions for INFPs about INFPs
    By marm in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 26
    Last Post: 01-02-2010, 01:48 AM
  5. [INFP] INFPs, think you're special?
    By JivinJeffJones in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 12-05-2008, 04:22 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO