, this one's for you. I've noticed your 'INFJs need to accept other, critical, perspectives' gets my hackles up BIG time. So I figured I'd ask you for what that means, specifically.
What I hear when I read that the way you word it is 'INFJs do hurtful stuff occasionally. If so, Others have the right to tell them that they're assholes/arrogant bastards/hateful bitches/unloving self-centered critters and INFJs have to take that on board as the truth.'
If that's also what you mean, I don't actually think that's a healthy thing for INFJs. Anecdote: All the time I still lived at home, my mother told me I was arrogant and unloving. I tried to resist that perspective with all my might, because that perspective blocks me from taking on other roles in life. Being arrogant and unloving is incompatible with being a friend, a good classmate, a fun acquaintance, a loving partner, a caring mother, etc. (Of course I never completely managed to resist her perspective - she's my mother, after all, so she must both be right and have my best interests at heart. Right?) And that did completely block me from trying to get into mutually fulfilling relationships for a while - I figured that since I was unloving and arrogant, the best I could hope for was being tolerated.
So maybe that's just the wording, but I don't think it's healthy for INFJs to take on judgements into their self-identity like that. Much better to have a self-concept that says 'I'm a loving person, and loving people don't have to be perfect but they do need to fix things when they break them and learn from the situation in which the things got broken.'