It's nice to have that confirmed by an Fe-user. You have no idea how long I've been confused by that, while growing up and later on. They seem so polite and sweet and so sure of themselves you just feel like you somehow deserved what thye're doing, since they're like the 'nice' ones..so it must've been you that somehow fucked up (and the worst part is, they notice they have this effect on you and know how to make it worse and worse even, and feel justified in doing so!). It's also why I wanna get to the bottom of what is Fe, so I can differentiate, and not feel guilty or like I didn't try everything when I don't get on with a Fe-user.
Fwiw, I too can very much understand why someone would *not* wanna be near an exploding Fi-user. Or one that completely lost himself and got stuck in a FiSi loop, as they're like a broken record of negativity. Fi has its very very ugly moments.
...mmm...which beckons the question. Pit, I can see when a Fi-user is going toxic, but also...why. I understand why they're in that predicament often, as I've been there. And, for that matter, I also notice the scared and confused individual underneath it. Instead of actually getting annoyed at them (or I might at first, but quickly catch on), I tend to feel love for them. I feel empathy at that point. And my heart goes out to them, as I know what it's like. That does NOT mean however I'm unaware of the damage they can do and the thread they can pose to your own sanity. Those that are so jaded that they insist on staying in that loop however (out of choice, not coz they don't see a way out), however get on my last nerve as well.
Is it like that for you with Fe-users who display this kind of behavior as well? And if so..could you plz plz plz tell me what it is that makes them do that? What fears and problems and insecurities cause it? How that behavior comes to be? And what on earth makes them so arrogant about the fact they're right in the way they're behaving while making someone else miserable (or do they just appear that way?) IN other words..do they piss you off, or do you find yourself smiling understandingly at them and realizing what's going on and by default somehow know how to handle the situation?