Quote Originally Posted by Tiltyred View Post
Speaking for myself, it's important to name and define because if I can't, I just go around in circles wondering why I feel so miserable, why I feel so victimized, why my self-confidence is shot, why the ache in the pit of my stomach, what's wrong with me that I can't do better, etc etc. If someone can tell me, well, it's because you're suffering abuse, here is the definition of abuse, these are the specific behaviors you've been dealing with, then I have something to work with. It gets very mixed up in there because I don't want to see what I don't want to see in a loved one, and I'm very likely to take the blame upon myself for anything that goes wrong. If I can categorically pronounce it abuse, I can at least read about it and find a way to cope or a reason to get out. The defining gives me a rock to stand on.
Absolutely, wholeheartedly, agree and relate to this.