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  1. #31
    Senior Member Lateralus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GirlAmerica View Post
    Would you/have you? Under what circumstances? What do you actually consider cheating?
    I never have, never will. I don't even allow myself to get into a situation where there's temptation.

    Sex with someone outside of the relationship is obviously cheating, as is falling in love with someone else. Everything else is fuzzy, circumstantial.

    I've immediately broken up with every girl that's ever cheated on me, but I'm starting to think that's because I knew they weren't right for me, anyway. Given the right circumstances, I would work things out with someone who cheated if I thought they were worth it.
    "We grow up thinking that beliefs are something to be proud of, but they're really nothing but opinions one refuses to reconsider. Beliefs are easy. The stronger your beliefs are, the less open you are to growth and wisdom, because "strength of belief" is only the intensity with which you resist questioning yourself. As soon as you are proud of a belief, as soon as you think it adds something to who you are, then you've made it a part of your ego."

  2. #32
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sakuraba View Post
    I know an ENFJ who cheated on her two past boyfriends.

    They're not all angels you know

    Aw, c'mon! I dropped straight outta heaven and you know it!

    I kid. I jest. *adjusts tarnished halo and rumpled wings* Good thing that old lady broke my fall!
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
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    Dramatic>Sensitive>Serious

  3. #33
    homo-loving sonovagun anii's Avatar
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    At first I was thinking... the NFs who've cheated (emotionally, physically, or otherwise) won't respond due to fear of getting strung up. So the replies will be skewed and not reflecting of reality.

    Then I saw a couple brave souls share their painful revelations... I admire you for that.

    Never say never people. You just can't know... you can think you know what you'd do... but never say never.

  4. #34
    unscannable Tigerlily's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by anii View Post
    At first I was thinking... the NFs who've cheated (emotionally, physically, or otherwise) won't respond due to fear of getting strung up. So the replies will be skewed and not reflecting of reality.

    Then I saw a couple brave souls share their painful revelations... I admire you for that.

    Never say never people. You just can't know... you can think you know what you'd do... but never say never.
    Unless I am brain damaged or just plain out of my mind, I just won't do that to my Husband. Believe me I have had this conversation with many people over the years and I am one hard headed lady, like a rock! I've even had disputes about this very subject prior to even getting married when I worked in a hair salon and 10 years later with a Husband and three children I haven't faltered.
    Time is a delicate mistress.

  5. #35
    Senior Member alcea rosea's Avatar
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    NF's and cheating

    I haven't and I won't.

  6. #36
    Senior Member Lateralus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by anii View Post
    Never say never people. You just can't know... you can think you know what you'd do... but never say never.
    For me, it's still never.

    If infidelity isn't against an NFs value system, I could see an NF cheating. Otherwise, it's entirely believable that they wouldn't. NFs generally take their values very seriously. I know there are certain lines I just can't cross and cheating is one of them.
    "We grow up thinking that beliefs are something to be proud of, but they're really nothing but opinions one refuses to reconsider. Beliefs are easy. The stronger your beliefs are, the less open you are to growth and wisdom, because "strength of belief" is only the intensity with which you resist questioning yourself. As soon as you are proud of a belief, as soon as you think it adds something to who you are, then you've made it a part of your ego."

  7. #37
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    I wouldn't. I couldn't. It would make me SICK. I mean, physically ILL.

    I'm not saying that I haven't had my head turned by a taken man (I never know it until AFTER he's gotten my attention, so please don't anyone think I go after married/engaged guys...) but I could never "go there" with one. I feel bad enough making any sort of sustained eye contact with them, much less CHEAT.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
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  8. #38
    mrs disregard's Avatar
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    I would never, ever cheat. I am straight-forward.. and cheating is passive-aggressive (for women.. at least). It is just so cowardly! If I was cheated on, the last thing I would do is do that whole sit down, justify what happened, confront him thing. I would call him, say it's over. Please don't try to convince me otherwise. Now, I am an open-minded person.. and I understand that I will probably be in a situation where I will want to cheat some day.. but I always consider the motives of others.. So this is the train of thought that would run through my head: What does some guy I'm about to sleep with have to offer me? What is he doing other than seducing another man's woman? He's a lowlife.. and then I couldn't possibly respect him anymore. Then, all chances of him getting with me are out the window. I have been on the other side of this ordeal.. I have been the girl approached by a very (unsingle) close friend of mine, and they attempted to persuade me of their love for me. Bah! I had none of that. Friendship over.

  9. #39
    Senior Member Chiharu's Avatar
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    I see the potential in NFs in general, and particularly in myself. However, my father cheated on my mother (amid a slew of other offenses), broke up our family, basically disowned my brother, and I haven't seen or spoken to him in years. After seeing first hand what cheating can do, I would never do it. Not that I wouldn't be tempted, but I know I couldn't live with the backlash of guilt and self hatred. I don't see the point in cheating anyway. If the person you're with isn't enough to prevent you from seriously considering cheating, break up with them.

    As to what I consider cheating... that's tougher. Some forms of emotional cheating are waaayy worse that actual, physical cheating. I'd rather my SO bed a slew of cheerleaders than spend a significant portion our relationship wishing they were with someone else.

  10. #40

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    No, I have not. If I ever did, my partner's condemnation wouldn't even ripple the tidal wave of remorse and regret that I'd set upon myself.





    (Wow! Talk about gravedigging. )
    Last edited by iwakar; 02-23-2011 at 08:33 PM. Reason: Wow
    "The purpose of life is to be defeated by greater and greater things." - Rainer Maria Rilke

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