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  1. #11
    ~*taaa raaa raaa boom*~ targobelle's Avatar
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    have I physically cheated on anything no or on anyone no... could I no.

    have I considered it yup, have I emotionally cheated on someone yup. It was hell though, it's not something that you ever think you can do, not something that we can even realize in the moment, we wake up one day and are hit with it like a ton of bricks. At least that was how it was with me.
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  2. #12
    Senior Member chippinchunk's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wedekit View Post
    If you mean relationships:

    Never. The first (and only) person I dated cheated on me and I don't ever want to feel like that again, much less make someone else feel like that. Ironically, they promised me a week before they would never hurt me. (And they wonder why I don't trust anyone?)

    No matter how much I love someone, if they are unfaithful I won't be able to forgive them, and I'll be sure to make that very clear to everyone I date. I take promises seriously, and I take commitment even more seriously. If they are so unhappy with me that they would cheat on me, I hope they at least pay the courtesy of breaking up with me before they do it.
    AGREED! I think the same way.

  3. #13
    *ears perk up* wolfmaiden14's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GirlAmerica View Post
    Would you/have you? Under what circumstances?
    Technically, I have. Though, it was REALLY young and it was nothing serious, so I don't know how much weight it really holds. I was in eighth grade and he was in sixth, I think it was a friendship misunderstood as attraction(Well.. okay, obviously it was since a couple years later he came out as gay. XD), and it was pretty much all but officially over and I met someone and kissed him. (Which was my first kiss. -.-) So... I guess that counts. Though trivial, I still feel guilty and refuse to ever do anything like that again.

    Especially now, I don't often find people attractive, so when I do love someone, all the attention goes to him. I rarely even notice other guys when someone really has my heart.

    What do you actually consider cheating?
    Anything that would be intimate under the circumstances. It really all depends on context. I mean, even take cuddling. It's one thing to maybe, run your fingers non-chalantly through the hair of a platonic friend who has put their head on your leg or shoulder or something. It's another to put your arm around someone you find attractive or who finds you attractive and revel in being able to do so. It's one thing to get a few kicks out of flirting with someone you find attractive, another to be extra extra friendly and touchy and actually try to get them to fall for you.

    So, I guess it really doesn't matter what you're doing, so much as the intent behind it. If you do any sort of action with the hope of showing or gaining physical attraction, it's being unfaithful. Though, I know that might be a kind of strict and unrealistic definition, and it probably wouldn't deeply bother me unless it got to the point of reeeally intimate cuddling and/or kissing. It would also depend on the seriousness of the relationship, and what boundaries each individual set up.
    Forming characters! Whose? Our own or others? Both. And in that momentous fact lies the peril and responsibility of our existence. - Elihu Burritt

    Member of the Maverick's Biker Club - Now crashing through walls instead of just..walking into them.

  4. #14
    Resident Snot-Nose GZA's Avatar
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    I think I cheated on a french quiz in grade 5, but I didn't feel good about it, it felt really empty. I don't cheat to win or anything... the only time I cheat is when I use the "cheats" in video games


    ...I'll let myself out

    As for relationships, I've never been in one, but I can't imagine myself cheating.

  5. #15
    RETIRED CzeCze's Avatar
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    I love the Bob Dylan quote that goes something like, "to live outside the law you must be honest."

    My relationships and arrangements with people are built on honesty and adapatability - they could not survive otherwise.

    The agreements people have in each relationship is unique for that relationship. Some people have pretty liberal open relationships, but fidelity and loyalty are two different things. Even if you are 'allowed' to sleep with other people outside your relationship it is still possible to cheat if you break your agreement.

    So for me, cheating means knowingly doing anything outside the agreement or anything your reasonable partner would feel betrayed, hurt and/or angry by. Usually this is compounded by lying and so much creative justification like "I didn't want to tell you because it's not important/I didn't want to hurt you/ etc." More than the cheating itself the lies and excuses the cheater tells pisses me off more.

    More than anything I think this is COWARDLY and I despise emotional cowardice.

    So I'm very forthcoming and direct.

    And no, I would never cheat. If anything I would end things with someone if I really thought I wanted to pursue something else.

  6. #16
    *ears perk up* wolfmaiden14's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CzeCze View Post

    So for me, cheating means knowinglydoing anything outside the agreement or anything your reasonable partner would feel betrayed, hurt and/or angry by. Usually this is compounded by lying and so much creative justification like "I didn't want to tell you because it's not important/I didn't want to hurt you/ etc." More than the cheating itself the lies and excuses the cheater tells pisses me of more.
    THERE! That's the definition I was working towards.. but my own personal spin and preferences got in the way. XD Thank you Cze.
    Forming characters! Whose? Our own or others? Both. And in that momentous fact lies the peril and responsibility of our existence. - Elihu Burritt

    Member of the Maverick's Biker Club - Now crashing through walls instead of just..walking into them.

  7. #17
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GirlAmerica View Post
    Would you/have you? Under what circumstances? What do you actually consider cheating?
    I did cheat on a couple of tests when I was younger. But I only looked over using my periphery vision, I didn't turn my head over towards them at all. It's not my fault the desks weren't spaced far enough apart. When I was older, I didn't do so as much (I haven't cheated since 9th grade). Partially because I began to think it might be wrong, and partially because I make a point to understand things well enough that it wouldn't give me an advantage to do so anymore. I like to think it's more the former, but I have to confess the latter has a lot to do with it.

  8. #18
    RETIRED CzeCze's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfmaiden14 View Post
    THERE! That's the definition I was working towards.. but my own personal spin and preferences got in the way. XD Thank you Cze.
    Aw, no problem.

    And I LOOOOVE this emoticon -->

  9. #19
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    iv'e cheated on all 3 of my b/f's. two physically and one emotionally.but only towards the end when i know its not working. thats when my will power is zero.

  10. #20
    Senior Member Eileen's Avatar
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    i haven't technically cheated, but i've felt guilty--as if i was cheating. this is because i was in this non-committal sexual thing that i was really unhappy with because it was emotionally unrewarding. so i went out on some dates, ended up meeting someone i liked a lot, and ended the non-committal thing before i started any kind of sexual relationship with the new person. i felt guilty, though i was upfront in telling the guy who didn't want commitment that i'd met someone else. i should have ended the non-committal thing simply because i was unhappy and not because it was convenient because i'd found someone else.
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    "I can never be what I ought to be until you are what you ought to be. You can never be what you ought to be until I am what I ought to be. This is the interrelated structure of reality." -Martin Luther King, Jr.

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